


The Boy In 4B

by NotLostAnymore



Series: Austin Heights [1]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Chatlogs, Crushes, Ensemble Cast, F/F, F/M, First Dates, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, M/M, Multi, Neighbors, POV Multiple, Slow Burn, Surprise Pairing, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Workplace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-16
Updated: 2015-11-23
Packaged: 2018-03-01 16:33:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 53,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2780066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotLostAnymore/pseuds/NotLostAnymore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryan has a crush and Lindsay won't let him forget it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was going to be a drabble one-shot but I realized that there were some legs on this story so here we go, I guess it's going to be a chaptered fic...

**TuggLife:** sooooooo u speak to 4b yet??

In theory, none of them were supposed to know who each other were. Ryan had absolutely no idea who came up with that stupid rule but the sheet telling them that there was a chatroom for their apartment building had specifically request they keep themselves anonymous. Some of them had tried harder than others to follow that rule. Ryan himself had fallen back on his Gamertag 'Mag King' which he thought was anonymous enough for anybody who didn't know him well.

'TuggLife', however, he'd guessed immediately to be Lindsay Tuggey, the girl who had moved into 5C across the hall from him. For one thing it was hardly the most coded of usernames and for another 'TuggLife' was a big fan of getting rowdy and talking about cats in the chatroom. It really hadn't taken Ryan long to put two and two together.

 **Mad_King:** It's never going to happen.

 **TuggLife:** u dont know that

 **TuggLife:** he could be dreaming about having ur babies right now

 **Mad_King:** It's only 6pm. If he's asleep now I'm worried about him.

 **TuggLife:** ur always worried about him

 **TuggLife:** he's ur bae after all  <33333333333

 **Mad_King:** Oh my god please stop.

_[PUNKELMAN is now online]_

**Punkelman:** Eyyyyyyyyyyyy partys here

 **TuggLife:** HEY BARB!

 **Punkelman:** shhhhh it's a secret

Ryan just rolled his eyes at that. There was no way anybody in their right mind hadn't guessed that Punkelman was Barbara Dunkelman, the blonde girl in 3E who held an open invitation party pretty much every other Friday night. Ryan had only been to two and that was because Lindsay had dragged him. It had also been the first time he'd met the British boy living in 4B and maybe it was just the haze of drunken memories but he'd been a little hung up on him ever since. Of course Lindsay never let him forget it, giving him a knowing smile every time they passed in the hall and making sure to quickly ditch him if she ever saw 4B approaching. It was all for nothing really though. Ryan didn't even remember 4B's name and the less he knew the better. If he'd had any kind of interest in Ryan at all then he'd had plenty of chances to make it known and he hadn't. It was that simple no matter what Lindsay said.

 **Mad_King:** Hey Punkelman.

 **Punkelman:** Whats going on in here tonight then?

 **Punkelman:** Were you two having a little private moment? ;)

 **TuggLife:** ew please no

 **Tugglife:** we were discussing mad king's crush on 4b

 **Mad_King:** 1) Rude

 **Punkelman:** 4b? Oh he cuuuuuuuuuute

_[THEROCKJR is now online]_

**Mad_King:** 2) I do not have a crush on 4B!

 **TheRockJr:** U have a crush on 4b????

 **TuggLife:** it's bad guys

 **TuggLife:** i catch him staring longingly into the distance dreaming of 4b

 **Mad_King:** You do not! That's bull!

 **Punkelman:** Heyyy Rock!

 **TheRockJr:** Somebodys defensive!

 **TheRockJr:** Hey Barb u were looking good this morning in the gym!! 10/10

 **TuggLife:** you guys banging yet???

 **Punkelman:** A lady never tells...

 **TuggLife:** thats a yes

Ryan pulled himself away from the keyboard, letting out a small groan. Lindsay was more than a little invested in the gossip that spread throughout the Austin Heights apartment complex, she was always rushing by with some new story about a hook-up or an affair. He honestly couldn't keep up so he'd just stopped bothering. It wasn't like any of that stuff bothered him anyway, he kept to himself most of the time and if it wasn't for Lindsay then he wouldn't have met half of the people she spent so long gossiping about.

Walking into the kitchen, he pulled open the fridge and grabbed himself a beer. Any other self-respecting single man in their thirties would probably be out on the town trying to get some private attention before their looks faded for good but Ryan had never been about that kind of life. He had always preferred to keep to himself and partying had always felt more like a chore than fun. He didn't mind a drink or two here or there but it was a sad fact that aside from Lindsay he didn't really have many friends.

By time Ryan came back to his laptop several more people had arrived in the chat and luckily the conversation had moved on from Ryan's interest in 4B. He refused to call it anything more than that because there was simply no way he had a crush. The idea was just incomprehensible.

 **TheRockJr:** soooooooo that's a no to tequila?

 **MJ_Rage:** dude tequilas fucking gross anyway

 **TuggLife:** i'm with michael jackson here

 **MJ_Rage:** stfu

 **Punkelman:** I will never say no to tequila

 **Punkelman:** I just object to people throwing it up over my carpet

 **LightOfTheMoon:** does it have to be friday? i work late on fridays...

 **TheRockJr:** friday's PARTY NIGHT BRO!!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** it's also make the rent night.

 **TuggLife:** maybe we could do BOTH NIGHTS

 **MJ_Rage:** keep the party going all day?

 **TuggLife:** hell yeah! why not!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** old man sorola would probably kill us

 **TheRockJr:** pffffft somebody give sorola a drink + he'll be out for days

 **TuggLife:** yo madking u still there?

 **Mad_King:** I'm here.

 **Punkelman:** You're coming right?

 **TuggLife:** yeah he is ;)

Ryan took in a sharp breath, already knowing what Lindsay's next comment would be about. He already felt like too many people knew about his silly... thing for 4B and he didn't want her spreading it any more than she already had. No matter how many times he told her that though she kept bringing it up. In fact he was beginning to get the impression she was deliberately doing it until everybody in the complex knew and he couldn't escape it. Then, before she could make that dreaded comment, a godsend occurred:

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now online]_

**Punkelman:** It just got weird in here...

 **LightOfTheMoon:** hey weird!

 **MJ_Rage:** GODDAMN IT PUN

 **MJ_Rage:** YOU MAKE THAT JOKE EVERY TIME

 **MJ_Rage:** IT'S NOT EVEN A JOKE

 **TuggLife:** u realize she does it because of ur reaction right?

 **Punkelman:** Works like a charm every time! :D

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I like it

 **AhoyWeirdness:** It's like I have my own jingle

 **Mad_King:** Hey Weird.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Your highness! Hi :)

'AhoyWeirdness' was one of the people in the chat who had actually taken the lengths to hide their identity from everybody. For once Ryan had no idea who he was talking to but he had a theory and not one he was about to share with Lindsay before she started spewing her mouth and freaking out like she always did. His theory:

Weirdness was 4B.

It had taken him a while to come to that conclusion and he still wasn't totally sure but there had been hints and he didn't think he was reading into it too much either. For one thing Weirdness spelt everything the British way, using the letter 'u' when there was really no need for it and more than once he'd used 'top' as an expression for liking something. It was the same expression he'd overheard a British voice using in the wash room one day and it was hardly common slang. Then there was the fact that Weirdness always seemed so goddamn nice and he had mentioned going to the exact same party Ryan had met 4B at. He wasn't reading too much into it... was he?

 **MJ_Rage:** ugh they're gonna be gross again

 **TheRockJr:** whens the wedding guys?

 **TuggLife:**  i'm afraid the mad king is betrothed to another

 **Mad_King:** Shut up guys!

He couldn't deny that his cheeks had turned a soft shade of pink though because as ridiculous as it sounded, there was a small part of him that liked being teased about how close he was with Weird. Well, they weren't super close but they'd had a couple of late night chats in the chatroom alone and Weird was always taking his side whenever arguments broke out. The idea that Weird might also be 4B only added to that excitement. He was honestly just surprised that Lindsay hadn't figured him out yet.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** He is? Alas my heart shall have to move on...

 **MJ_Rage:** who even talks like that?

 **MJ_Rage:** your so fucking weird dude

 **Mad_King:** *You're.

 **MJ_Rage:** YOU'RE the worst kind of person

 **MJ_Rage:** also fuck you

 **Mad_King:** Somebody's tetchy.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I think he's jealous of our love, Mad King.

 **TuggLife:** its ok mj u can cry on my shoulder

 **Punkelman:** Tuggey's on the pull!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** i ship it

 **TheRockJr:** same

 **MJ_Rage:** FUCK ALL OF YOU

_[MJ_RAGE is now offline]_

**TuggLife:** aww we hurt his feelings :(

 **LightOfTheMoon:** if you listen closely you can already hear him crying

The sudden pause of messages made Ryan laugh of loud. They were clearly all taking that message far too seriously. The only thing he could hear was the faint sound of dance music coming from one of the floors below him.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Just got real quiet in here. Did we all actually do it?

 **TheRockJr:** yup

 **Punkelman:** i hate myself for it

 **TuggLife:** i feel used

_[GUS_SOROLA is now online]_

**Gus_Sorola:** WHO IS PLAYING THAT GODDAMN MUSIC

 **Gus_Sorola:** I WILL HAVE YOU EVICTED IF THIS GOES ON FOR ANY LONGER

_[PUNKELMAN is now offline]_

_[THEROCKJR is now offline]_

_[LIGHTOFTHEMOON is now offline]_

_[TUGGLIFE is now offline]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** I have a thing. Later, Your Highness.

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now offline]_

**Mad_King:** Not me?

_[MAD_KING is now offline]_

**Gus_Sorola:** WHY ARE YOU TURNING IT UP?!?!?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miles gets the chatroom to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a result of me having muse but not wanting to move the main story along too quickly so have some development in a couple of side stories!

_[LIGHTOFTHEMOON is now online]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** helloooooooooooooo?

**LightOfTheMoon:** i don't believe it

**LightOfTheMoon:** i am alone in the chatroom

_[IMUSTACHEYOUAQUESTION is now online]_

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** oh

**LightOfTheMoon:** you ruined it! :(

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** is it just you here moon?

**LightOftheMoon:** yeh

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** k

_[IMUSTACHEYOUAQUESTION is now offline]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** well that was rude

_[MJ_RAGE is now online]_

**MJ_Rage:** sup bitch

**MJ_Rage:** wheres everybody else?

**LightOfTheMoon:** you just missed mustache

**MJ_Rage:** whoopdee fucking doo

**MJ_Rage:** that doesn't answer the fucking question

**LightOfTheMoon:** everybody's so rude tonight :(

_[TUGGLIFE is now online]_

**TuggLife:** SUP BITCHES

**LightOfTheMoon:** you two are scarily alike

**MJ_Rage:** no we fucking arent

**TuggLife:** me and mj?

**TuggLige:** we're soulmates clearly

**MJ_Rage:** i just threw up

**TuggLife:** foreplay

**LightOfTheMoon:** you two have real fucking issues

**LightOfTheMoon:** anyway Tugg wheres Mad King? you two are always in here together

**TuggLife:** he is either working or stalking 4b

**TuggLife:** probably the latter

**MJ_Rage:** why 4b tho

**MJ_Rage:** he's british

**LightOfTheMoon:** i feel like that may have been a little racist...

**MJ_Rage:** and skinny as fuck

**TuggLife:** basically if the zombie apocalypse comes he's barely even a starter dish

**LightOfTheMoon:** why is that the first scenario you go to?

**TuggLife:** its coming bro

**TuggLife:** mark my words

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now online]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** Greetings fellow citizens!

**TuggLife:** suuuuuuuuuuuuuup

**MJ_Rage:** suuuuuuuuuuuuuup

**AhoyWeirdness:** Awww Pun isn't here. I miss my jingle. :(

**LightOfTheMoon:** you two are scarily in sync

**LightOfTheMoon:** also hey weird

**AhoyWeirdness:** Mad King isn't here either :(

**MJ_Rage:** its too fucking quiet tonight

**TuggLife:** old man sorola is patrolling the corridors

**TuggLife:** he wants to find whos playing the music

**LightOfTheMoon:** isn't it pun???

_[PUNKELMAN is now online]_

**Punkelman:** I have been summoned!

**LightOfTheMoon:** HOW THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT?!?!?!?!?

**AhoyWeirdness:** I always knew you were magical, Pun.

**TuggLife:** now this is more like it!!

**MJ_Rage:** fucking great -_-

**Punkelman:** Has anybody seen Rock today?

**LightOfTheMoon:** NO BUT HOW DID YOU DO IT

**TuggLife:** nope why??

**MJ_Rage:**  he's probably being a dudebro in the gym

**LightOfTheMoon:** DO YOU HAVE A CAMERA INSTALLED IN MY ROOM OR SOMETHING

**Punkelman:** He left his boxers in my room last night

**Punkelman:** Would it be weird if I pinned them to the noticeboard?

**AhoyWeirdness:** Take it from the king of weird - yes. Yes it would.

**LightOfTheMoon:** ARE YOU WATCHING ME RIGHT NOW?

**MJ_Rage:** stfu moon

**Punkelman:** Yes I am Moon

**Punkelman:** I like your chest hair

**Punkelman:** It's pretty

**MJ_Rage:** your so fucked up pun

**Punkelman:** If you weren't so in love with Tugg I'd say we were soulmates for that very reason

**TuggLife:** lol what

**MJ_Rage:** what the fuck are you talking about

**MJ_Rage:** fuck you

**MJ_Rage:** thats bullshit

**MJ_Rage:** whatever i have things to do

_[MJ_RAGE is now offline]_

**TuggLife:** ummmmmmmmmmmm

**LightOfTheMoon:** holy shit you broke him in record time

**AhoyWeirdness:** You really ARE magic, Pun...

**Punkelman:** Dumbledore taught me well

_[TUGGLIFE is now offline]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** bye then :/

**AhoyWeirdness:** Anybody think there's something actually going on between those two?

**Punkelman:** I could ship it

**Punkelman:** Hell I already do

**AhoyWeirdness:** Rock's just coming down the street btw.

**LightOfTheMoon:** are you magic too?

**AhoyWeirdness:** Of course.

**Punkelman:** Right losers, I'm gonna go steal another pair of man panties

**AhoyWeirdness:** Happy hunting!

_[PUNKELMAN is now offline]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** Doctor Who is calling my name so I'm gonna go too.

**AhoyWeirdness:** Talk later, Moon!

**LightOfTheMoon:** bye!

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now offline]_

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** you just missed your boyfriend dude

**Mad_King:** My boyfriend?

**LightOfTheMoon:** weird

**Mad_King:** Oh.

**Mad_King:** He's not my boyfriend.

**LightOfTheMoon:** mhmmmmm

_[MAD_KING is now offline]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** liar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus points if you get who IMustacheYouAQuestion is. Then again, it really isn't hard...


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan catches Lindsay out.

Somehow Lindsay had managed to talk Ryan into going for drinks so here they were at a bar a few blocks away from the apartment complex and Ryan already had a couple of beers in him. He wasn't exactly a big drinker but that was because he didn't get the chance very often. The idea of spending more time with his work colleagues than he already did wasn't exactly appealing so he wasn't left with many options. Luckily Lindsay had all but forced her friendship on him so at least he had an excuse not to be that creepy guy at a bar on his own that nobody wanted to be seen near.

"So... you see him today?" Ryan was surprised it had taken Lindsay as long as it had to mention 4B. They'd been in the bar for a total of half an hour and the topic of his silly little crush had only just come up. This had to be some sort of record because usually it was the first thing she asked him about. Luckily she'd had some work-related bitching to do first and Ryan had been thankful for the reprieve of his interrogation. He should have known it would only be temporary though, Lindsay liked to make sure that he never forgot it.

"No," he sighed in response, shaking his head and deciding to busy himself with sipping his third beer of the night rather than looking at Lindsay. He already knew she was giving him a pointed look, observing his every action, and he didn't want to give her any more ammunition than she already had.

"I have," she admitted and before he could stop himself Ryan was looking straight at her, his head moving so fast he was probably going to get whiplash. Immediately her lips split into a big grin and Ryan internally groaned, knowing he'd screwed himself over. "He was talking to Barb in the lobby. They seemed pretty friendly, she could probably put in a good word for you if I asked..." She swirled the umbrella around her cocktail glass, eyes not leaving Ryan for a moment as she tried to catch his immediate reaction.

The offer was tempting, he had to admit. He wasn't sure he had it in him to talk to 4B first even if he was 'AhoyWeirdness' and he knew how ridiculous that sounded. He was a grown man and he couldn't even approach a guy he liked that. That was another issue in itself through - what if 4B didn't like older guys? What if he didn't like guys at all? Or what if he was put off by the fact Ryan hadn't asked him out himself? No, there were too many what ifs and he didn't want to risk his chance on somebody else making him look good.

_God, what am I talking about?_

He was starting to sound like a teenage girl with a high school crush and that was precisely the opposite of what he wanted to happen. He was supposed to be keeping it cool and ignoring his crush but that was getting increasingly hard to do when Lindsay kept bringing it up and pushing him towards approaching 4B.

"No, it's fine. I'll talk to him," he mumbled in response before catching the look of excitement in Lindsay's eyes and quickly adding, "Someday." He didn't want to pressure himself into doing it when he wasn't ready. Hell, he didn't want to do it at all.

With a pout Lindsay looked away from him and back down to her phone where she started to type animatedly. Ryan thought nothing of it at first, returning to down the rest of his drink before he realized just how often Lindsay had looked at her phone in the short time they had been at the bar.

"Who are you texting anyway?" he asked, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. Lindsay usually kept him up to date on the inner goings of her personal life whether he asked for the information or not so she was keeping awfully quiet about something.

She glanced up at him, a surprised look on her face as if she'd honestly not expected to get caught. Ryan wondered whether he should be offended that she thought he was that unobservant. "Nobody," she muttered, quickly placing her phone face-down on the table. It vibrated a second later and she snatched it up again, eyeing Ryan suspiciously as if she'd expected him to grab it. Honestly he'd been tempted.

"That's a lie," he pointed out, shaking his head at her. She just pulled a face at him and tapped out another message on her phone before sending it off with a smile.

With Lindsay preoccupied by whoever the hell had captured her attention, Ryan pulled up his own phone and with a speed that made him worry for his own sanity he had brought up the apartment complex's chatroom. At this rate he knew it would probably be easier to make it his home page but that was just another level of lame he wasn't ready to cross yet.

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

"Oh shit!" Lindsay suddenly swore across the table, looking up at him in abject horror.

**MJ_Rage:** i thought you you only drunk red wine???

**MJ_Rage:** oh

**MJ_Rage:** fuck

_[MJ_RAGE is now offline]_

_[TUGGLIFE is now offline]_

Ryan just stared from his phone to Lindsay and back again. Her phone had been slammed down on the table, her cheeks lit up in embarrassment. As the initial bout of shock started to wear off, he found himself smirking. Oh how the tables turned... "So you and MJ, huh?" he asked, making sure to sound every bit as teasing as she usually sounded when she talked to him about 4B.

"We're just chatting," she protested, betrayed by the blush that had crept across her skin. There was no way Ryan was buying into that lie and she knew it. "Shut up."

"Oh ho ho, you really think I'm letting this drop?" he asked, laughter in his voice as he waved down the bartender for another drink. Yeah, this was going to be a fun night. "Why does he know your favorite drink? Have you two been on a date?" Ryan hadn't thought it was possible but somehow Lindsay went even redder than she was before. He paused, surprised by her silence. "You have? I was just joking but - wow, how was it?" he asked, amazed at her ability to keep something to herself for once. How very unlike her.

Lindsay shook her head, protesting firmly, "We're not talking about it. Final word." She wasn't angry or annoyed but Ryan knew better to push his luck so he raised his hands in defeat with one small concession:

"Then we aren't talking about 4B either."

"Fine." There was a small pause and then: "So what's up with you and Weirdness, huh?"

Ryan was really starting to regret agreeing to drinks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will have more of the chatroom in, don't fear!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan causes issues in GTAV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently falling ill so I don't have the energy to write a full chapter. Instead accept this short chapter with some of the guys discussing gaming. Hopefully regular chapters will be back soon!

_[IMUSTACHEYOUAQUESTION is now online]_

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** MAD KING IS A FUCKING LUNATIC

**Punkelman:** Isn't that kind of suggested in his name???

**Punkelman:** Also I love your username

**TuggLife:** what did he do????

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** he fucking blew me up in gtav twelve times in twenty minutes

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** does anybody know what apartment he's in so i can kick his ass

**TuggLife:** wait u guys play gtav too?

**TuggLife:** AND U DIDNT INVITE ME?!?!?!?!?!

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** not anymore

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** i'm gonna use my xbox to bash his fucking head in

**Punkelman:** You're beginning to sound a lot like Rage...

**Punkelman:** Don't you agree Tugg? ;)

**TuggLife:** shut up

**KingOfTheBeards:** hey we should start a gtav crew!

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** only if mad king is nowhere near it

**TuggLife:** but he can be the group psycho!

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** right you're out too

**Xrayyy:** i'm all for it

**Xrayyy:** level 112 bitches

**KingOfTheBeards:** what?! i'm only 44!

**Xrayyy:** slacker

**Punkelman:** Or maybe you just need a life X-Ray?

**Xrayyy:** my feelings are hurt

**Xrayyy:** how dare you

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** xray you're in

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** i guess beard can be too

**TuggLife:** u guys suck

**TuggLife:** pun lets make an all girl crew

**TuggLife:** pretty sure red riding hood plays

**Punkelman:** Buy me the game and we'll do it.

**TuggLife:** deal

**TuggLife:** we are gonna kick ur fucking asses

**Xrayyy:** fucking bring it

**TuggLife:** oh its brung

**Gus_Sorola:** HEY I PLAY TOO

**IMustacheYouAQuestion:** fuck that

_[IMUSTACHEYOUAQUESTION is now offline]_

**Xrayyy:** gonna go blaze it

_[XRAYYY is now offline]_

**KingOfTheBeards:** i need to build a house. bye guys!

_[KINGOFTHEBEARDS is now offline]_

**TuggLife:** i have to go steal a kitten

_[TUGGLIFE is now offline]_

**Gus_Sorola:** DOES ANYBODY PLAY LAST OF US?

**Punkelman:** This chatroom is about the be...

**Punkelman:** The last of Gus

_[PUNKELMAN is now offline]_

**Gus_Sorola:** WHAT ABOUT DESTINY?

**Gus_Sorola:** HEY WHY DID YOU ALL LEAVE

**Gus_Sorola:** SCREW YOU GUYS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always points to whoever guesses who the new characters are... even if they're both super easy!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan finds himself feeling more than a little shy at the apartment complex's Christmas party.

**Punkelman:** Soooo the holiday party is tonight! You're all gonna be there riiiiiiiiiiiiight? :D

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Wouldn't miss it for the world!

 **TuggLife:** so so game

 **LightOfTheMoon:** hell to the yes

 **MJ_Rage:** i mean i have nothing better to do with my night...

 **Gus_Sorola:** I HAVE THE NOISE COMPLAINT ALREADY TYPED UP

 **Punkelman:** Tugg you know if Mad King is coming?

 **TuggLife:** dunno

 **TuggLife:** i can make him come though

 **LightOfTheMoon:** i bet u can ;)

 **MJ_Rage:** gross dude

 **TuggLife:**  i so wouldnt go there anyway

 **TuggLife:** besides he has a husband

 **AhoyWeirdness:** He does?

 **Pukelman:** YOU

 **MJ_Rage:** fuckin moron

 

* * *

 

Ryan really didn't want to go to the party. For one thing he was really not in a socializing mood to the point were he'd stayed off the chatroom all day but for another, he wasn't really a big fan of Christmas or any holiday really. All it did was remind him of all the family arguments and disappointments he'd experienced as a kid. Ever since he'd left for college and never looked back Ryan had always spent Christmas alone, never celebrating with anything more than a beer, and had never stopped. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd been given a present but it wasn't like he was crying about it. The holidays were just a crappy time and he could deal with it like the grown man he was.

Of course Lindsay had different ideas. Didn't she always?

She had known something was up when he hadn't shown up in the chatroom at all and that itself was a sign that he really needed to get a life because he couldn't have his only friend thinking that he was so lonely he spent all of his time in a chatroom waiting for people to talk with him. He did other things like... well, work and drink beer. Normal things. He was content with having a simple life but apparently at some point he had let the chatroom become a big part of that and now he was wondering if he'd live to regret it. Anyway Lindsay had shown up in his door wearing a ridiculous elf costume and thrust a jumper at him that had Rudolph on the front with an LED-light nose. The thing was absolutely horrific and Ryan just stared at it in disgust.

"There's no way I'm ever wearing that," he told her sternly as he shook his head. Lindsay had twisted his arm plenty of times before and made him do things that he hadn't planned on doing but this was going too far. There was no way he was allowing that waste of good fabric hug his body like she was clearly intending it to.

The pout was laid out in full force and Ryan was just thankful that its affect had weakened over time. The first time had led to him going to the party where he'd first met 4B and that had proven to be one hell of a moment of weakness. Now she was trying her luck again but this time Ryan wasn't prepared to give in no matter how pleading her puppy dog eyes looked.

"I'm not even going to the party anyway," he sighed, stepping back to allow her into the apartment so they weren't stuck having this discussion in the hallway. He still wasn't convinced that somebody hadn't bugged all the hallways so they could find out what was going on at any given moment. The apartment complex was full of odd personalities after all and he really wouldn't put it past some of the people he'd met in the chatroom to be like that.

"But you have to!" Lindsay insisted, matching Ryan's own frown as they rounded on each other. A fight was brewing and they both knew it but Ryan wasn't going to let her win. He always did and this time he was going to stand his ground for real. No good would come of him going to that party and he didn't want to get forced into feeling uncomfortable around a bunch of people he didn't really know in order to celebrate a holiday that he made a point of never celebrating. There was literally nothing appealing about the idea of going to that party.

Okay, that was a lie. There was 4B.

It made perfect sense that he was going to be there. He was good friends with Barbara after all, as Lindsay had pointed out to him, plus it at been at one of her previous parties that they'd first met. Ryan was still kicking himself for having as much to drink as he had that night because he couldn't even remember 4B's real name or what the hell they'd even spoken about. All he could remember was how great the younger male had looked when he was all dressed up in a nice shirt and a British accent that sent shivers down Ryan's spine. The idea that it could happen again at this party... Well, it was almost worth going for.

Almost.

"I bet 4B will be there," Lindsay continued, adding more evidence to Ryan's theory that she could actually read his mind. Seriously it was pretty scary how often she guessed exactly what he was thinking down to specific details when they were so different. Lindsay was the extrovert to his introvert and he was painfully aware of it. He had no idea how she had as much energy as she did or how he'd managed to put up with it for so long.

Shaking his head, Ryan turned around and walked to the sofa. "I'm still not going," he told her briskly, crossing his arms and looking up at the ceiling. Okay, he was sulking but why wouldn't he? Lindsay always made these bossy demands of him and they never ended up going in his favor. All they'd do was disagree and then she would sneakily find a way to trick him into doing exactly what she'd wanted in the first place. He had no idea how she did it but it always happened and he was starting to think he needed to invest in creating some kind of anti-hypnosis device just in case Lindsay was using witchcraft to mess with him. He really wouldn't put it past her either.

The argument continued for some time, Lindsay pacing the room as she reminded him that it was healthy to talk to people and that people on the chatroom wanted to meet him. His point that the chatroom was supposed to be anonymous was quickly brushed aside so he'd instead gone the route of claiming he had important work to be doing that took precedence over drinking and standing in the corner of an unfamiliar room.

He lost the argument and ended up wearing the jumper to the party.

 

* * *

 

As expected, the music was too obnoxiously happy and the people around him were already forming their own little cliques so Ryan was left standing alone in the corner of the room with a bottle of beer as his only company. Lindsay had disappeared the moment they'd arrived and Ryan had no idea why he hadn't decided to escape when her watchful eye wasn't upon him. Okay, he did: he was tempted by the idea of running into 4B again. Maybe this time he'd end up having a conversation with him that he could actually remember.

Barbara was fulfilling her duties as host like the expert she was, mingling with every little group just long enough to make them all feel like she was genuinely most excited to have them there. Every time she got too close Ryan shuffled a little so he'd be out of her view. He was sure she'd be nice and in the chatroom she'd been friendly enough but he also wasn't prepared to have a one-on-one encounter with her because he had a good guess that she'd probably be even more outgoing than Lindsay and that just wouldn't be fun to handle.

After ten minutes of being god knows where Lindsay finally joined him in his private corner of Barbara's apartment and swapped out his empty beer bottle for a new one. "So, having fun?" she asked, all smiles and excitement. Clearly her observation skills weren't the best because Ryan was hardly giving off the appearance of somebody who was having the time of their lives. If anything he looked like he wanted to die because that's sure as hell how he felt on the inside. Parties like this were just too much for him and he couldn't stop thinking about how nice it would be to be curled up in bed with a book and a cup of coffee. This was all Lindsay's fault.

"So much fun," he replied drily, rolling his eyes as Lindsay took it in her stride without noticing the sarcasm. "Where did you disappear to?"

All it took was that simple question for Lindsay's cheeks to flush with color and she didn't have the alcohol to blame either unless she'd downed about six drinks in that ten minute period. "Just saying hello to people," she replied quietly, avoiding his eye. Immediately he knew what she meant and for the first time at the party he cracked a smile, glad for the opportunity to give her some of the hell she enjoyed giving him.

"Talking to MJ?" he teased, his voice going high as he playfully added, "Did you kiss under the mistletoe?" Lindsay shot him a glare but Ryan didn't feel bad about it at all. She had teased him about 4B for so long and there wasn't even anything happening there so he was grabbing every opportunity he possibly could to tease her in return about whatever the hell she and MJ had going on.

"I wasn't. I... I can't find him," she admitted before quickly knocking back the remainder of his drink, "I don't actually know what he looks like." Ryan did a spit take, eyes bulging at the revelation.

"You don't know what he looks like?!" he repeated, a small laugh of disbelief in his voice, "You guys talk twenty-four-seven and you have no idea what he looks like?!" This was just too good to be true. How was it possible that they'd grown as close as they had and yet they had no idea of the other's appearance? Just thinking about it made him laugh out loud and he was more than happy to accept the slap on the arm that Lindsay gave him because the hilarity of the situation overrid any pain he might have felt.

With Lindsay there distracting him Ryan had lost track of Barbara and had finally been caught out. Neither of them had even seen her approach, she was just suddenly there with her big smile and an excalamation of, "What's so funny, pal?" It was only then that Ryan realized Barbara had no idea who he actually was. She knew pretty much everyone in the chatroom because some of them made absolutely no effort to hide their identities but Ryan had and he hadn't dropped any hints either. For all Barbara knew he could be a stranger off the street or somebody's plus one or even one of the weird people in their complex that didn't use the chatroom. The thought of it made him laugh even harder.

"He's being a bully," Lindsay explained, struggling not to laugh despite herself. Maybe it was a little funny after all.

Barbara looked between them in confusion and nodded slowly. "Okay then. You keep doing that," she encouraged before quickly slipping away to talk to somebody else, making the two of them laugh even harder. For a moment Ryan forgot about the fact that he didn't want to be there and just enjoyed the moment. He didn't feel so tense anymore.

Then, over Lindsay's shoulder, he saw him.

4B was stood over by the fireplace with a beer in one hand as he spoke to an older man with an impressive mustache and more tattoos than Ryan had ever seen in his life. They were deep in discussion and clearly comfortable with each other to the point that Ryan had to silence the pang of jealousy he felt inside of him. It was ridiculous and he knew it. He had no claim over 4B especially when he didn't even know the other's name.

For any other person it would be easy to just walk over there and join the conversation but that just wasn't a possibility for Ryan. He was terrified of messing up and ruining his one chance to make a good impression on the younger male, even if it technically wouldn't be their first meeting. Besides he didn't feel comfortable interrupting anybody's discussions, especially not when they were clearly having so much fun with each other.

Forcing himself to look back at Lindsay he engaged in some light and meaningless conversation with her while glancing back at the boy who had captured his attention so easily. Every now and then 4B would look around as if he was expecting somebody but he never left the other guy's side. Every time their beer bottles approached emptiness Ryan thought he might have a chance to catch 4B alone but then Barbara would arrive and offer them more drinks, spoiling his chances.

Eventually he just felt pathetic and creepy. He hadn't even noticed when Lindsay had left him in his corner but he spied her talking to a young guy with curly auburn hair and they seemed to be hitting it off nicely. Ryan found himself smiling for all of a moment, glad that at least one of them was having a good night, before he downed his beer and walked out.

 

* * *

 

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now online]_

Ryan felt his heartbeat spike for a moment, glad for some company in the otherwise silent chatroom. Everybody was downstairs enjoying themselves at the party, even old man Gus and here Ryan was back in his apartment with the chatroom open in a second window. Weirdness had been the first person to come online in over an hour which had to be some kind of record. Ryan wasn't sure there was ever a time that there weren't at least two people in the chatroom for a whole hour.

 **AhoyWeirdness:**  Your Highness!

 **Mad_King:** Hey Weirdness.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Did you go to the party?

 **Mad_King:** Yeah but not for long. Stomach bug.

It was a small lie but it wasn't exactly like he could say "I couldn't find the courage to talk to my crush and my only friend ditched me for her online boyfriend so I decided to sulk in my own apartment for the rest of the night", was it?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** That sucks! I looked for you.

For a moment Ryan forgot how to breathe. Weirdness had looked for him? Immediately his mind flashed back to watching 4B and seeing him glance around the room as if he was expecting to see somebody. Was it possible that the two things were related or was he just looking into things too closely yet again? No, he had to be right. 4B was Weirdness, there weren't any two ways about it.

 **Mad_King:** Well I'm sorry I missed you then!

He really was.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Get some rest, you pleb. Stomach bugs aren't fun.

 **Mad_King:** That they aren't.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I hope you feel better soon!

Knowing that there was no way he was going to be able to stay online and stick to his cover story, Ryan decided to accept defeat.

 **Mad_King:** Thanks. Enjoy the rest of your night!

With a feeling of anger and disappointment aimed only at himself, Ryan shut the laptop down and let out a long sigh. The night had been yet another wasted opportunity and one he was going to be kicking himself over for a long time.

"Merry fuckin' Christmas to me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there was a break between chapters! I'm still feeling pretty ill but I want to keep updates fairly regular on this fic so I had to get this written and move the story on a little more.
> 
> I'm always open to writing drabbles for RT pairings (esp Freewood), just give me a request/prompt at my tumblr (sledgeroe) and I'll get it done as soon as possible!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan does a night shift. It's never fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always this is unbeta'd so if you find any SPAG mistakes then let me know!

For the first time in longer than Ryan could remember, he had company on Christmas day. He had risen the sounds of knocking on his door at about eleven in the morning and was more than a little confused. Who could possibly be knocking for him on a day like today?

Of course it was Lindsay. He should have guessed straight away.

She had decided that as she wasn't going home to see her family this year and he didn't seem to be doing anything either then they should celebrate together. Ryan was quick to point out that he had no form of Christmas dinner planned nor did he particularly want to bother himself with making anything. He didn't mind cooking but he only ever cooked for one person and right now he really didn't have the patience for some big dinner. Lindsay didn't take no for an answer though and Ryan found himself sharing his apartment with her for the rest of the day.

Using whatever they found in their respective fridges they threw together an impressive feast of leftovers and contented themselves playing on his Xbox until the sun was going down. At some point Lindsay had busted out a bottle of whiskey and eventually the Xbox had been abandoned in favor of drinking. Maybe it was in the spirit of the holidays or maybe just because she had a lot going on but Lindsay ended up drinking a lot more than Ryan had ever seen her drink before and she started to spill her heart out, taking him by surprise. She had always stuck her nose into his business - not that he minded that much, not really - and yet he apparently knew so little about hers.

"How did I not know what he looks like?!" she drunkenly slurred, the wine glass holding her whiskey dangling precariously between her fingers. If Ryan had been sober then he would have been freaking out but the alcohol in his own system had loosened him up a bit and all he could do was not sympathetically, hoping to provide Lindsay some comfort even though he had no idea what the hell she was on about. "I mean, you think you'd just know, right? Like I should have been able to tell!" she continued, not even looking at Ryan anymore as she ranted aloud, "He didn't even recognize me either! Ugh, this is so not going to work. I should just give up now."

"Amen to that," Ryan grunted in response, his thoughts focused on AhoyWeirdness and their brief talk on the chatroom just a few nights before. It wasn't going to lead anywhere good and he knew it but he couldn't make himself give up on that impossible hope just yet.

The conversation continued like that for hours until Ryan finally noticed the time reading three in the morning and kicked Lindsay back out across the hall to her own apartment. He was in desperate need of sleep and after how much she'd had to drink he was pretty sure she needed some too... or possibly some time alone with the toilet bowl. Ryan really didn't want to be there for that.

The next morning he seriously regret how much alcohol Lindsay had made him drink. His head was killing him and he could barely keep his eyes open the lights hurt so much. Work had decided to punish him for some unknown crime by giving him a night shift on Boxing Day which meant he wasn't due in work until eight in the evening and he somehow had to kill an entire day. In true Ryan fashion he spent most of it on the couch regularly destroying 'IMustacheYouAQuestion' and 'KingOfTheBeards' at Grand Theft Auto V. He'd received a fair few abusive comments from Mustache afterwards but it had been well worth it.

Finally he found himself sat at his desk staring blankly at his monitor wishing that his managers liked him enough to put him on normal shifts. Burnie Burns was a nice guy but he was very hands off when it came to actually doing his job. No matter how often he promised Ryan that he'd put him on more normal shifts he would always end up doing night shifts or early mornings and eventually Ryan had just given up asking.

Being a computer technician wasn't exactly the most glamorous job in the world but Ryan didn't mind much. It paid well enough and he knew he was good at it but his parents had always told him was destined for more. Ryan had never really cared much about what they wanted from him though, he had just gotten on with his simple life.

The first few hours of the shift had been nonstop, moving between cubicles and performing a few simple fixes for the other employees that were too dim to switch their computers on and off. Those dim people kept him in a job though so he couldn't really complain. After he dealt with the final task he found himself at loose ends with still another six hours left of his shift.

After a while he decided to give into his normal night shift activity and typed in the URL of the chatroom into the search bar. It was only two in the morning but he knew people would still be online at this time. They always were. He'd done this more than once, even when Burnie had been in the room. It wasn't like he had anything to do for the majority of his shift anyway, he'd answer a call every now and then but he was mostly being paid to sit around on his ass and be bored for a few hours so he might as well make use of that time to talk to his... friends? Had they reached the point that he could call them that yet or was he just being presumptuous? After all it wasn't like they knew each other really...

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

**RedRidingHood:** Mad King heyyyyyy! 8-D

 **AshJenx:** Heyo Mad King!

 **Mad_King:** Hey ladies. You're up late!

 **AshJenx:** Tugg has us levelling in GTAV so we can take on the guys.

 **RedRidingHood:** I suck :(

 **Mad_King:** Pretty sure everybody plays now!

 **Mad_King:** Mustache won't let me into his crew though :/

 **AshJenx:** You can join our crew!

 **Mad_King:** Your all girl crew?

 **AshJenx:** Sure why not?! You and Tugg are friends right?

 **Mad_King:** I guess that's true...

 **RedRidingHood:** You on a night shift?

 **Mad_King:** Yup. Bored as hell.

 **RedRidingHood:** Sucks! :(

 **Mad_King:** Four hours left... Not that I'm counting!

 **AshJenx:** Whats your bosses name by the way?

Ryan paused, a frown forming on his lips. He didn't know either of them well enough to call them friends on the same way he did with Lindsay but they were both always up late and kept him company whenever he was doing terrible shifts like thid.

 **Mad_King:** Burnie... why?

 **AshJenx:** Burnie Burns?

 **Mad_King:** ...yes.

 **AshJenx:** I KNEW IT!

 **AshJnex:** I went on a date with him last week :D

 **Mad_King:** You went on a date with my boss?!

 **RedRidingHood:** Yay thats awesome! Is he hot?!?!

 **AshJenx:** Hell yeah he is!

 **Mad_King:** I don't want to be hearing this O_O

Ryan liked Burnie well enough and sure he could recognize that the other man was handsome but he really didn't look at him like that and he definitely wasn't about to use the word 'hot' to describe him. Then again Ryan wasn't sure he'd call anybody hot, at least not to their face. He tended to get incredibly embarrassed while talking to people he found attractive or he just didn't talk to them at all. After all, that's what had happened with 4B.

 **AshJenx:** Hey ask him if he's still on for our date next friday!

 **Mad_King:** I'm not asking my boss about his dating life!

 **RedRidingHood:** Why not?!

 **Mad_King:** Because that would be weird!

 **AshJenx:** Only if you make it weird

"Ryan, hey!"

The voice made Ryan jump out of seat, spasming in surprise for a moment. Behind him Burnie just laughed, shaking his head as he enjoyed Ryan's reaction.

"I wish I'd filmed that. Funny shit, dude!" Burnie said good-naturedly as he walked into the small office and perched himself on his desk. "Busy night?"

"Not too bad. Sat down about ten minutes ago," Ryan admitted, leaning back in his chair and glancing from Burnie to the chatroom. He seriously hoped Burnie didn't glance that way because he'd end up seeing a discussion about himself that Ryan really didn't want to be a part of.

"You're an attractive guy," Burnie started suddenly, catching him by surprise. Ryan stared up at his manager, eyes bulging slightly. "You must go out with a lot of girls--" Oh okay, Ryan had a good idea where this was going and he didn't like it. He didn't even have the heart to tell his boss that he definitely didn't go out with many girls because the last time he checked, he was definitely more into other guys. "You got any tips for me?"

The way Burnie was looking at him made Ryan sympathize with him. He wasn't sure when they'd gotten to the point that his boss asked him for dating advice but as per always Ryan would do his best to help him. He could never turn down somebody when they asked for help. "Uh, well how many dates have you been on so far?" he asked, eyes darting back to the chatroom where the girls were chatting away.

 **RedRidingHood:** Mad King's quiet...

 **AshJenx:** OMG IS HE THERE?

Forcing himself to look away, Ryan glanced back at his manager just in time for his answer. "This'll be our second. Is that too soon for a kiss?" Ryan just stared, shocked that he was even being asked this. He figured that somebody like Burnie would know what he was doing a lot more than Ryan did but apparently not. "God, this sounds so fucking high school, doesn't it?"

"I think it's fine," he answered quickly, hoping he was giving the right answer. "If she's comfortable with it and you are then why not?"

"Yeah, why wait? I mean we're old -- not that old, obviously..." Burnie began to ramble, glancing around the room and finally spotting the chatroom open on Ryan's desktop. "Hey, what's this?"

"Where are you taking her for the second date?" Ryan asked quickly, snapping Burnie's attention back to him. This was quickly turning into Operation: Hide Burnie From The Chatroom and it wasn't the kind of game Ryan wanted to be playing.

"A pizza place in town," Burnie answered casually before a look of concern crossed over his features, "Should I be aiming more upmarket?"

"Yeah, definitely a bit classier," he replied, commpletely making it up on the spot, "You want to show that you'll treat her good, right?"

It was if hed just cast a magic spell in front of his manager because Burnie's face lit up with a huge smile. "You're so right. Shit dude, you're pretty good at this!" he said happily, clapping him on the back. Ryan just gave him a sheepish smile in response.

Luckily his phone rang and Burnie suddenly sprung up onto his feet as if he remembered that he was paying Ryan for a reason. "Better leave you to it. Thanks bud," he said quickly, already on his way to do the door. He paused before he got there, leaning back as he added, "Hey, we should go out for drinks some time! You free Saturday?"

Ryan's kneejerk reaction was a to say no. Going drinking with Lindsay was bad enough and he actually knew her. Drinks with his boss would be a whole different thing and he was pretty sure he wasn't ever going to be ready for it. "Sure thing, boss!" he replied, forcing himself to smile even though his brain was screaming in despair. How did he get himself into these situations?

Picking up the phone, Ryan listened to the droll voice complaining about a power outage in their cubicle while keeping his eye on the chatroom.

 **AshJenx:** Come on what is he saying?!?!?

 **RedRidingHood:** Don't leave us in suspense!

Rolling his eyes at both their desperation for gossip and the person who was still comaplining into his ear, Ryan typed out a quick reponse.

 **Mad_King:** You should dress nice for the next date.

_[MAD_KING IS NOW OFFLINE]_

The next half an hour was spent dealing with an actual challenging task for once and Ryan was glad for the distraction because he kept seeing Burnie hovering around and wasn't looking forward to having more dating questions thrown at him when his own dating life was so lackluster. The fact he'd managed to make up any believable answers at all was more than a little impressive in his opinion.

Finally settling back down into his small office, Ryan powered up the chatroom without thinking about it and a groan escaped his lips as he saw the username of the only other person online.

 **Gus_Sorola:** FINALLY SOMEBODY ELSE

 **Gus_Sorola:** MY INSOMNIA IS KEEPING ME UP AND I NEED SOMEBODY TO PLAY DESTINY WITH ME

 **Gus_Sorola:** ACCEPT MY FRIEND REQUEST

It was going to be a long night...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some new characters thrown into the ring! Don't worry I'll get into the main love story soon, I just want to set up some side characters and establish Ryan's life a little more before then...


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lindsay and Geoff have a meeting in the chatroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another mini chapter because I'm still ill and wanted to write a little something anyway. The main story is going to get rolling properly in the next chapter!

_[IMUSTACHEYOUAQUESTION is now online]_

**TuggLife:** aha rival crew leader!

 **TuggLife:** we meet again

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** rivals huh?

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** pretty big talk for a bunch of girls

 **TuggLife:** scared a bunch of girls are gonna kick ur ass?

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** as if that would EVER happen

 **TuggLife:** wait and see

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** fine

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** a proposition

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** we'll set up a heist with both crews and whoever gets the money wins

 **TuggLife:** deal

 **TuggLife:** prepare to lose

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** youre goin up against the five best gamers in this building

 **TuggLife:** not true

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** myself, beardy, xray, mj_rage and rock jr

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** we are gonna kick your asses

 **TuggLife:** um no ur not

 **TuggLife:** i have red riding hood, pun, ashjenx and mad king

 **TuggLife:** there's no way i'm losing

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** wait MAD KING?!??!?

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** what the fuck

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** he's not a chick

 **TuggLife:** well u wouldn't let him in your dick sizing contest so we did

 **TuggLife:** sucks to be u

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** he's gonna fucking betray you so bad

 **TuggLife:** we're still gonna win

 **TuggLife:** u fuckfaces got a crew name?

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** the mustachios

 **TuggLife:** fucking really? (Y)

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** yeah really

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** what about you nerds?

 **TuggLife:** the bombshell barbies

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** ...

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** even mad king?

 **TuggLife:** ESPECIALLY mad king!

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** does he know this yet?

 **TuggLife:** nope!

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** well you're on

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** loser buys three bottles of whiskeys

 **TuggLife:** make it five and its a deal

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** fucking a

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** you're gonna regret that so bad

 **TuggLife:** ironic last words

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** saturday 8pm

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** make sure your crew is there

 **TuggLife:** we'll be ready and waiting for the sausagefest

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

**Mad_King:** Hey guys!

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** hey bitch barbie

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** you're gonna get crushed on saturday

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** you could have been on the winning team if you weren't such a fucking lunatic

 **TuggLife:** don't listen to him he's just scared

 **TuggLife:** we're gonna kick their straight white boy asses

 **Mad_King:** I am also a white boy... man.

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** you're still a barbie

 **Mad_King:** What does that even mean?

 **TuggLife:** we're the bombshell barbies!

 **Mad_King:** We... are?

 **Mad_King:** What have I gotten myself into?

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

 **IMustacheYouAQuestion:** see you later suckers

_[IMUSTACHEYOUAQUESTION is now offline]_

**Mad_King:** Explain. Now.

 **TuggLife:** :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There may or may not be a GTAV AU one-shot based on the events discussed in this chapter...


	8. Chapter 8

At about five in the afternoon there was a loud abrupt banging on the door that snapped Ryan out of the zone he'd allowed himself to fall into while level grinding on GTA Online. More than a little confused and perhaps a little delirious after spending what was probably too many hours holding up stores at gunpoint in a video game, Ryan hobbled over to the door and opened it to see a girl stood there in a form-fitting dress with a full face of make-up and her hair perfectly done up. It actually took him a few moments to realize who it was because he'd never seen Lindsay in anything other than jeans and a simple graphic tee.

"How do I look?" she asked, looking up at him with pleading eyes and clearly waiting for his response.

"Uh... amazing," he breathed, finally managing to find her voice. There was no denying how great Lindsay looked, she had just totally taken him by surprise with how different she looked. "Is there a reason you're dressed up to the nines?" he asked, feeling the need to ask the most obvious question.

She shifted somewhat awkwardly on the spot, glancing down the hallway before answering. "I have a date with Michael-- MJ tonight." She tugged on the hem of her dress, pulling it down a tad. "Is this too much?" Ryan had no idea what he was supposed to say to that. He couldn't even remember when his last date even was so he was hardly the most experienced about what a girl should wear on a date. What was it with people asking him for dating advice lately? First Burnie and now Lindsay. It was worrying him a little bit, as if arrows were starting to be pointed at him to mark him out as a lonely single thirty-something and that was just plain depressing.

"Is this the first date?" he asked finally, waving her into his apartment so they wouldn't have to have the discussion in the middle of the hall.

"Yeah. Oh god, this is too much, isn't it?!" she replied, panic very clearly crossing her face as she started to fidget even more with her dress.

Sensing that he was about to have a situation on his hands Ryan crossed to his fridge and pulled out two bottles of beer. Popping the caps off of both of them, he held one of them out to Lindsay. After a moment of hesitation she took it and downed half of it in one go. He really wasn't surprised. "Maybe it's a bit...  _fancy_ for a first date?" he suggested, treading carefully so he didn't make the situation any worse. Everybody who had seen Lindsay and Michael in the chatroom together knew that there was something going on between them and it was about time they got their act together and did something about it. Ryan didn't want to be the person responsible for ending it before it even got started.

"You're right," she agreed before necking some more of the beer. As she lowered the bottle from her lips she let out a long sigh and shook her head. "I feel like I'm wearing a mask. I need to go shower again," she decided before turning to him, "You, in my apartment. You're helping me choose my outfit." Ryan got the impression that it wasn't a request and even though he probably could have said no he didn't, instead settling for quietly following her across the hall into her apartment.

The next hour was spent with Ryan sat on Lindsay's sofa watching as she walked in and out of the bedroom wearing a different outfit each time. It was as if Lindsay's closet was never-ending because he had lost count of how many outfits she'd tried on after the first twenty minutes. Even though he expressed his support for a number of things she tried on, Lindsay kept finding flaws in each of them and continued on tearing her closet apart in an attempt to find the perfect first date outfit. She'd also done her hair up in a number of ways and honestly Ryan was feeling a little overwhelmed and confused. Since when had he been the kind of friend who did this? Didn't Lindsay have any girl friends she could call over to help her rather than an entirely inexperienced male neighbor?

A knock at the door interrupted the makeshift runaway show when the clock ticked past six o'clock. A look of horror flashed over Lindsay's face.

"That's him." There was a slight pause as panic set in. "Oh God, I'm so not ready for this. I haven't even found the perfect outfit!"

Jumping off of the bed, Ryan crossed over to Lindsay in a few short steps and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You look fine. Now go have a good night," he instructed her, squeezing her shoulder lightly and giving her a small smile. "Don't get too wasted either," he added as he steered her towards the door.

Just as he was about to reach for the door, Lindsay slapped his hand away and rounded on him. "Go hide in the bedroom!" she hissed at him, starting to push him away, "I don't want any awkward questions!" It took a few moments for Ryan to realize what she meant but he quickly did as he was told and hid himself in her bedroom, quietly closing the door behind him. As he'd guessed her bedroom looked like a bombsite with clothes all over the floor and the bed. It was a miracle she'd been able to find anything at all. Her closet hadn't even been totally emptied either!

"Wow, you look great!" he heard a nearby voice say, a slight Jersey accent in the words. 

"Thank you so much. You look incredibly handsome!" That was definitely Lindsay and Ryan smiled to himself, glad to hear the confidence back in her voice. He knew she could do this and he was glad that there wasn't any hesitation before she spoke.

"You ready to go?"

"I was born ready!" Ryan had to place his hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter so they wouldn't hear him because  _of course_ Lindsay would say something like that on a first date. She definitely knew how to make a first impression, he'd give her that. 

He waited until the door closed the sound of footsteps disappeared down the hallway before leaving his hiding space. Creeping out of the apartment, he walked over to his own door and let himself in. By time he made it to his desk he had a perfect view through the window of Michael helping Lindsay into the passenger seat of his car. It wasn't the nicest car in the world but hell, the fact that he was driving her there rather than making her walk gave him points in Ryan's back. 

Barely a second after their vehicle pulled away, Ryan caught sight of a familiar face walking towards their apartment building: his boss, Burnie Burns. Instinctively he ducked away from the window before realizing that being on the fifth floor meant there was probably no way that Burnie would be able to see him. Being too curious for his own good, Ryan settled himself by the window and ten minutes later watched as Burnie escorted a beautiful blonde woman out of the building and into the back of a cab.  _Jinx_. Just putting a face to the username was weird enough to shock him into realizing what he was doing. This definitely counted as either stalking or spying, neither of which he was thrilled at the idea of doing. Slightly red in the face, Ryan pulled away from the window and settled himself down in front of his laptop. He needed a distraction.

 

* * *

 

_[PUNKELMAN is now online]_

**Mad_King:** Hey Pun!

 **Punkelman:** Mad King wassupppppppppppppppp?

 **Mad_King:** The sky?

 **Punkelman:** That was lame + you should feel ashamed

 **Mad_King:** Don't worry, I do!

 **Punkelman:** Where is everyone tonight anyway???

 **Mad_King:** They're all out on hot dates.

 **Mad_King:** Surprised you're not out with Rock, aren't you two a thing?

 **Punkelman:**  Who said that?

 **Punkelman:**  Was it Rock?

 **Mad_King:** No no, it was just me guessing.

 **Mad_King:** Do you want to be a thing with Rock?

 **Punkelman:** Hows 4b?

 **Mad_King:** You're avoiding the question!

 **Mad_King:** And I don't know! I'm not his minder!

 **Punkelman:** No but you are MADly in love with him

 **Punkelman:**  Get it? Madly? Cuz you're the mad king??

 **Mad_King:** Yeah I got it. It's your turn to feel ashamed by the way.

 **Punkelman:** NEVER!

 **Punkelman:** Anyway who's out on hot dates if it's not you and 4b??

 **Mad_King:** TuggLife and MJ_Rage

 **Punkelman:**  About damn time!

 **Mad_King:** And AshJenx is out with my boss.

 **Punkelman:** ...

 **Punkelman:** Awkward?

 **Mad_King:** Not really. Well unless she starts talking about their sex life in here. Then yes.

 **Punkelman:** I'm gonna make it awkward as a gift to your highness.

 **Mad_King:** Please no.

 **Punkelman:** :D

 _[AHOYWEIRDNESS_   _is now online]_

 **Punkelman:** aaaaaaaaaaaaaand thats my queue! later lovebirds!

_[PUNKELMAN is now offline]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** Whats up withh her??

 **Mad_King:** She's just being odd as per usual. How're you?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** littl bit tipsy

 **Mad_King:**  Celebrating something?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** just neeeded some courage

 **Mad_King:** For what?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** go on a date with me????

 **AhoyWeirdness:** i think your awesome

 **Ahoyweirdness:** like reallly awesome

 **AhoyWeirdness:** am i making this weird??

 **AhoyWeirdness:** get it? cuz i'm ahoymweirdness!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** hello? did i scare you off? :(

Truth be told Ryan had been staring at the screen in shock for a good few minutes now, watching each new message roll in and unable to make himself move and respond. Everything he'd secretly wanted but refused to admit to was happening but he had no idea how to react to it. 4B was clearly tipsy and might regret saying it the next day so Ryan didn't want to take advantage of him being in that vulnerable state. Still, he couldn't deny how badly he wanted to go on a date with him. What was he supposed to do?

 **Mad_King:** I'm still here. Just a little surprised.

 **Mad_King:** Maybe we should take about this tomorrow when you're sober?

 **Mad_King:** I mean... I'm not opposed to the idea.

 **Mad_King:** I just wanna make sure you're serious about this.

He waited several minutes for a reply. Nothing came.

 **Mad_King:** Weirdness?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** you'd actually go on a date with me???!!?

 **Mad_King:** I would, yeah.

Lindsay was going to freak out when she heard about this, he already knew it. Maybe it was selfish of him though but Ryan wanted to keep it to himself. Lindsay was already entrenched in every part of his private life, couldn't he have this bit to himself?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** then i'm gonna go sleep so i can sober up!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** gnight your highness x

 **Mad_King:** Goodnight!

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now offline]_

Ryan let out the breath he wasn't even aware he'd been holding and pushed back from his desk. Had that actually just happened? It felt too good to be true. "Guess I'll find out in the morning," he sighed, shaking his head. Sitting in an empty chatroom wasn't that much fun and it was probably only a matter of time before Old Man Sorola logged in to bug him about not accepting his Xbox Live friend request. Yeah, it was better to sleep.

Of course his dreams were all about first dates with 4B going horribly wrong. It was a restless night to say the least.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan has a busy day at work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look, another chapter! Things are definitely progressing...

Ryan was the type of guy who enjoyed and pretty much needed a full night’s sleep to operate as a real life human being so when he was woken up after a couple of hours at three in the morning by a hammering on his door he was less than pleased to say the least. He already knew who to expect because who would be knocking on his door at this ungodly hour apart from one Lindsay Tuggey?

He had every intention of telling her to go away so he could try and get some more sleep but he didn’t even have the time to get the first word out before she was barrelling past him and into his apartment. “Come in then,” he sighed, the irritation in his tired voice clearly being ignored by Lindsay.

“He’s the one. Goddamn it Ryan, he’s the one,” she hissed, pacing nervously around the room. He stared at her for a couple of seconds before shaking his head.

“I’m going back to bed. This can wait.”

Apparently it couldn’t because the moment he’d slipped under his duvet cover Lindsay was in his bedroom, throwing herself down onto the bed next to him. He let out a sigh, knowing there was no way he was escaping this story any time soon. That didn’t stop him from at least closing his eyes and trying though.

“I didn’t want to meet the one until I was at least thirty,” Lindsay ranted, staring up at the ceiling and not paying any attention to Ryan’s frustration, “This is way too early. I’m not even halfway to fifty yet!”

“Go away,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by the duvet he had pulled up over his head.

“What am I supposed to do? Ryan, you’re old and wise – help me!”

The duvet was pulled down just enough for Ryan to glare at Lindsay. “I am not old, thank you very much,” he growled, earning a roll of her eyes in return.

“Keep telling yourself that, gramps. Anyway your mid-life crisis can wait, right now we’re helping me!”

“Get off my bed.”

“Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope!”

There was really no escaping it, was there? “Fine. You should go on another date with him.”

Apparently that wasn’t the answer Lindsay wanted to hear. She looked positively alarmed. “And why would I do that?”

“Because who’s to say he’s gonna wait around for you to turn thirty, huh?”

Lindsay paused, considering it. “Hmm, true. I don’t wanna end up old and single like you…” She earned another glare with that comment and just grinned in response. Lindsay had always taken great pride in annoying him and apparently even in the mild panic that came with finding ‘the one’ she was able to take time to do just that.

“Are we done here? Can I sleep now?”

“Guess so. Don’t sleep for too long, your life clock is ticking!”

“Leave.”

“I’m going, I’m going!” she huffed, jumping up off the bed and heading towards the door.

Ryan was asleep before she had even left the apartment. That explained why his milk seemed to be missing the next day.

 

* * *

 

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now online]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** Afternoon everyone!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** hey weird!

 **RedRidingHood:** Hey Weird! :D

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Yo

 **FrisbeesLovesYou:** Heylo!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Pretty busy in here today!

 **RedRidingHood:** We were just talking about Tugg and MJ

 **LightOfTheMoon:** we are pretty sure theyre a thing now

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Really?

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** I heard them debating whether or not they could kiss on a first date

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** At 3am

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Why were you up at 3am anyway?

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** No particular reason

 **RedRidingHood:** SUSPICIOUS

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Well it’s about time they got together anyway!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Hey has anybody seen Mad King online today?

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** He was online this morning but I’m pretty sure he’s at work now

 **RedRidingHood:** Did you know AshJenx is dating Mad King’s boss?!?!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** OOOOH GOSSIP i love it

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Hmmm okay then :/

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Don’t worry, your boyfriend will turn up eventually!

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** Wait you’re dating Mad King, Weird?

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** That’s cute!

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** We can do double dates!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** wait frisbee who are u dating???

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** NOBODY!!!!

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** I just mean when I get a girlfriend

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** Anyway I gotta go bye guys

_[FRISBEELOVESYOU is now offline]_

**RedRidingHood:** EVEN MORE SUSPICIOUS

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Sooooo he’s definitely hiding something

 **LightOfTheMoon:** sherlock mode activate!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** There’s always so much going on in here it’s hard to keep up

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Anyway I gotta run some errands, will be back later!

 **RedRidingHood:** Byeeeeeeeeee  <3

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Later Hater

 **LightOfTheMoon:** bye dude!

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now offline]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** u guys think he and mad king are bonking yet?

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Please never say bonking again

 **LightOfTheMoon:** I’ll bonk u in a minute

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** Is that a promise?

 **RedRidingHood:** I ship it!

 

* * *

 

For once in Ryan’s long time at the office he was kept busy on a near permanent basis and there was no point to slack off and check the chatroom. He was moving from cubical to cubical, solving issues from simple screen freezes to a total system malfunction. He felt like he was actually doing the work he was getting paid to do for once and while on any other day he’d be grateful for the work to keep his occupied and make his shift go faster, this was the one day where it really wasn’t appreciated.

He couldn’t shake his late night discussion with AhoyWeirdness from his mind. The idea that somebody wanted to go on a date with him was simply absurd – especially when it was somebody as friendly and as funny as Weirdness. It was fair to say that he had developed something of a small crush on him and the idea that he was 4B as well made Ryan more than a little excited for the date.

If it was actually going to happen, that was. What if Weirdness decided it wasn’t what he wanted and called it off instead? What if he decided it was just a drunken mistake or a joke? Ryan couldn’t deny that he would be disappointed. At least he’d managed to keep his mouth shut and not say anything to Lindsay about it because she’d never let him hear the end of it.

He had only just managed to sit back down in his office and power his own monitor up when Burnie poked his head around the door.

“You’re finished.”

“I’m sorry?” Was he being fired? That wasn’t good.

“We’re getting that drink,” Burnie explained, giving the other a big smile, “I’m letting you finish early. Come on, first round’s on me!” Ryan knew better than to keep his boss waiting so he quickly shut his laptop back down, grabbed his coat and hauled ass out of there while silently apologizing to Weirdness. At this rate he was never going to get a chance to message him, was he?

Around half an hour later he was sat at the bar of some dive place Burnie liked to frequent, already one round down. Burnie could give Lindsay a run for her money with how much he could talk but Ryan already knew that. The difference was that he knew he couldn’t be rude and tell Burnie to shut up because that was his boss. Lindsay was just… Lindsay.

“You know, I think she really likes me. I think I’m doing well for myself,” Burnie declared, having just finished a ten minute vocal essay about how great his most recent date with Ashley had been. Ryan had barely taken half of the information in because his boss was talking in such an excited manner that most of his words were blurring together.

“Good shout suggesting against the pizza place,” Burnie said suddenly, clapping Ryan on the shoulder and snapping him out of his daze, “Turns out she hates pizza!”

“Hates pizza?! Is that even possible?” Ryan blurted out, mentally noting to bring it up with Ashley the next time he saw her on the chatroom. What was up with that?

“I know! So weird but hey, she’s beautiful and funny and _smart_ so I’m willing to let it slide,” Burnie continued on, ordering them another round of beers without even hesitating to let Ryan offer, “Anyway, enough about me. You got a special lady in your life?”

Ryan couldn’t stop himself from giving his boss a sheepish grin as he felt his cheeks heat up. “Nope, no special ladies.”

There was a slight pause before Burnie raised his eyebrows and asked in a small voice, “Special gents?” Ryan could tell that his boss was somewhat hesitant in asking the question as if he was worried Ryan would be offended that he’d asked. It really wasn’t any issue to him though.

“None of those either. I am happily single.” That was a lie, Ryan definitely wasn’t happy single and he knew exactly who he wanted but the last thing he wanted to do in that moment was explain the whole story to Burnie. It was bad enough that Lindsay knew all the details, he didn’t need people at work knowing about it either and especially not his boss. What if Burnie thought he was some weird creepy stalker when it came to 4B?

“Well it’s good that you’re happy. You deserve it, dude,” Burnie continued, throwing his arm around the technician’s shoulders. Ryan had no idea when he suddenly became Burnie’s best friend but it wasn’t really that terrible. Maybe he could get away with suggesting a pay rise…

 

* * *

 

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** Your Highness! Hi!

 **Mad_King:** Hey Weird, sorry I couldn’t be on earlier. Work was crazy and I’ve only just escaped my boss talking about his dating life.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Sounds traumatic!

 **Mad_King:** It was.

 **Mad_King:** How’s your head been today?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Look about last night, I’m really sorry if I made you feel awkward.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** (My head is fine btw)

 **Mad_King:** No no it’s fine!

 **Mad_King:** How serious were you?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** How serious were you about not being opposed to the idea?

 **Mad_King:** Pretty serious.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Well then I was pretty serious too.

 **Mad_King:** Good!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Do you like pizza?

 **Mad_King:** I love pizza! (AshJenx doesn’t and therefore she is banished from my kingdom)

 **AhoyWeirdness:** We can go to that new pizza place down the street? (stone the nonbeliever!)

 **Mad_King:** Sure! Is tomorrow too soon?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Tomorrow sounds great to me! Meet you there at 7pm?

 **Mad_King:** Sure. I’ll book a table under the name Haywood.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Haywood, got it! Nice surname ;)

 **Mad_King:** I’m looking forward to meeting you!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** It feels like we’ve already met, it’s bizarre.

 **Mad_King:** You could say it’s… weird.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** You need to stop talking to Pun omg.

 **Mad_King:** I apologize. That really was terrible.

 **Mad_King:** Ah shit, I’ve just seen the time. I should probably hit the sack, got an early shift :(

 **AhoyWeirdness:** That’s okay!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Well not the early shift, that sucks…

 **Mad_King:** Tell me about it!

 **Mad_King:** See you tomorrow though. 7pm sharp!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I’ll be there!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Gnight your highness!

 **Mad_King:** Goodnight!

_[MAD_KING is now offline]_

He’d never admit it but as he logged off Ryan let out a high-pitched squeal that could never be described as manly. He couldn’t even bring himself to care, he was too overwhelmed with excitement at what the next day would hold.

He finally had a date with 4B!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEXT CHAPTER WE MEET AHOYWEIRDNESS! Time to get your final guesses in - who do you think it is? Is Ryan right in thinking it's 4B? Is it Gavin? Dan? Ben? Somebody else entirely? And who's cuter - Lindsay and Michael or Burnie and Ashley? What is Frisbee hiding? Who even are FrisbeeLovesYou and SoKdoneWithYou?!
> 
> ALL THE ANSWERS NEXT CHAPTER!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan and AhoyWeirdness meet for the first time.

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Are you guys free on Thursday?

**Punkelman:** Always!

**AshJenx:** I finish work at 6

**Xrayyy:** I finish jerking off at 6 too

**RedRidingHood:** Ray that’s gross

**RedRidingHood:** I’m free though!

**MJ_Rage:** why the fuck do u wanna know?

**SoKdoneWithYou:** It’s my boyfriend’s twenty-fourth. I was gonna throw a party…

**Punkelman:** A PARTY?!

**TheRockJr:** HELL YES

**TheRockJr:** I’LL BRING THE KEG

**RedRidingHood:** Rock! What if his/her boyfriend doesn’t want a keg?!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** His and a keg sounds fine. Fun even!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** As a rule though no height jokes

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Especially not calling him vertically challenged

**SoKdoneWithYou:** He will destroy your kneecaps

**MJ_Rage:** so ur fucking a hobbit???

**AshJenx:** MJ do you have to?! -_-

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Okay everybody but MJ is invited

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Spread the word, the more the merrier!

**Punkelman:** Do you have a theme yet?

**Punkelman:** Gotta have a theme!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** I… do not have a theme

**TheRockJr:** SPORT STARS

**Xrayyy:** NINTENDO

**RedRidingHood:** DINOSAURS

**MJ_Rage:** GENITALS

**AshJenx:** ALL OF THE ABOVE

**AshJenx:** …maybe not the genitals

**Punkelman:** The 20’s. Classy and fun.

**SoKdoneWithYou:** That’s actually a pretty decent idea

**Punkelman:** They don’t call me the party queen for nothing

**Punkelman:** Wanna go for a Starbucks run and we can have a meeting about decorations etc?

**SoKdoneWithYou:** I’m game for that!

**Punkelman:** Meet in the lobby in 10!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Sure thing. Bye guys!

**Punkelman:** Party Queen out!

_[PUNKELMAN is now offline]_

_[SOKDONEWITHYOU is now offline]_

**Xrayyy:** hey MJ if Tugg goes i bet u’ll come

**Xrayyy:** in more ways than one AYYYYYYYYYYY ;)

_[MJ_RAGE is now offline]_

**Xrayyy:** oh

 

* * *

 

Ryan was so distracted all day that he was pretty damn surprised that Burnie hadn’t pulled him aside and fired his sorry ass. The smallest fixes were taking an age to deal with and the more complicated things were just completely stumping him. His mind was too busy panicking about the fact he had a date later with a guy he’d liked for months now. How was this his reality?

The fact that he had managed to keep it to himself and not let Lindsay find out was a miracle in itself because he was sure she’d have something to say on the matter. Hell, he was sure that everybody in the chatroom would have an opinion which was precisely why he’d stayed off it all day. He didn’t want to accidentally let something slip and ruin everything before it had even gotten started. He knew that none of the other people in the chatroom would try and sabotage the date because they were all pretty much convinced that he and 4B were already dating but the more people that knew the more nervous Ryan would be and that was why he was keeping his mouth shut.

When he eventually did run into Burnie, he was treated to a long-winded story about what his boss had planned for his next date with Ashley. Ryan was hoping that Ashley hadn’t mentioned that she knew him to Burnie because the less he knew about the chatroom the better. Besides, as easy-going as Burnie was, Ryan really didn’t want him knowing that he’d been going on chatrooms during his work shift. It didn’t exactly sound work-appropriate and knowing Burnie’s dirty mind he’d probably presume that he was being very unprofessional indeed.

Finally the end of the day came and Ryan found himself scrambling out of work faster than he’d ever left before. He earned a few funny looks rom his colleagues but decided not to worry about that. Hell, he didn’t have enough nerves in him to worry about anything else other than the fact in a few hours he was going to be going on his first date in forever and had absolutely no idea what he was going to wear.

Oh God, he was going to have to tell Lindsay, wasn’t he?

 

* * *

 

_[PUNKELMAN is now online]_

_[SOKDONEWITHYOU is now online]_

**Punkelman:** Never fear, the party queen is here!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** And we have a theme!

**Kickass_Kara:** A theme for what?!

**MoreKeys:** Your next porn film?

**Risemonger:** Old Man Gus’ funeral party?

**TuggLife:** old man gus is DEAD?!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Holy fuck

**Risemonger:** No no… I was just being hopeful

**Punkelman:** You’re fucked up dude

**Risemonger:** My t-shirt says that exact same thing

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Anyway we have a theme for Jeremy’s party

**BigJeremy:** MY PARTY?!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Kovic I s2g you scared the shit out of me there

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Change your username I’m begging you

**BigJeremy:** nope never

**BigJeremy:** scaring you is too much fun

**BigJeremy:** getting your nudes… not so much

**TuggLife:** kdin has nudez? LEAK

**MoreKeys:** Tugg’s living the thirsty life

**Punkelman:** Aren’t you getting sporked by MJ yet?

**TuggLife:** NO!

**TuggLife:** also – sporked????

**Punkelman:** I’ve been spending too much time with 4B clearly

**SoKdoneWithYou:** BACK ON TOPIC

**SoKdoneWithYou:** the theme is lumberjacks and cowboys

**Kickass_Kara:** is this because of the time you called Jeremy your own personal tiny lumberjack?

**SoKdoneWithYou:** No

**Punkelman:** YES

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Anyway the party’s on Thursday in 3A so spread the word

**SoKdoneWithYou:** Bring +1’s if you want

**Punkelman:** Don’t worry Tugg, MJ’s invited!

**TuggLife:** lets go back to kdin’s nudes…

**SoKdoneWithYou:** LET’S NOT

**BigJeremy:** i can share them with you, tugg!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** NO

**MoreKeys:** Hey you can use 3C for the party too if you wanna make it bigger

**Punkelman:** Always go bigger

**MoreKeys:** Is that why you’re with Rock then, Pun?

**MoreKeys:** I mean… even I haven’t seen bigger and I’ve seen a lot

**Punkelman:** Slut

**MoreKeys:** BIPHOBIA RIGHT THERE

**Punkelman:** Shut up you love me  <3

**MoreKeys:** Maybe a little

**MoreKeys:** <3

 

* * *

 

By some struck of luck Ryan didn’t have to tell Lindsay anything at all. It took a good twenty minutes of staring at all of the shirts in his closet but eventually he found one that he thought was probably appropriate for a first date – not that he was an expert in that situation. It wasn’t too formal but it wasn’t too casual either because the last thing he wanted was for his date to think he wasn’t putting much of an effort in because that would only start them off on the wrong foot.

Truth be told Ryan was terrified. There was every chance that he was going to fuck this up and he really didn’t want that to happen. The more he tried not to think about it though, the worse his nerves were. It was a never-ending cycle he had no idea how to beat. Not going on the date at all wasn’t an option either, it would only make him feel worse in the long run and he was pretty sure this was his only shot to go on a date with a guy he actually liked.

Eventually just being in his apartment waiting for the time to come was driving him crazy so he ended up leaving early, slipping past Lindsay’s door as silently as possible. She seemed to have some sort of supernatural sense where she just knew when he was up to something and this was one of those situations where Ryan really didn’t want her to open her door and follow him. Luckily his trip down the hallway passed without incident and he even managed to avoid people on his way to the complex doors. He silently thanked whatever god there was for that small mercy.

Arriving to the restaurant a good twenty minutes before the date was even supposed to happen, Ryan graciously followed the waiter to the table and ordered himself a glass of water. His leg was unconsciously shaking as he waited, the nerves only building with every passing second. What if 4B took one look at him and left? What if he didn’t like older guys? What if he thought Ryan was an asshole because he was always so awkward?

Maybe he should have told Lindsay after all. She’d be able to calm him down.

No, that was a ridiculous thought. She’d only make him more nervous than he already was – if that was even possible. Ryan was pretty sure that he hadn’t felt this nervous before his driving test or even the SAT. How dumb was that? He could take life-altering exams easier than he could do first dates. It was embarrassing.

“Here you are, sir. Table for Haywood!”

Ryan looked up from the menu he’d been obsessively re-reading for the past quarter of an hour to see that he was no longer alone. The waiter had led his date to the table who just smiled awkwardly at him as he sat down.

His date was not 4B. AhoyWeirdness was not 4B.

“Hi, I’m Jordan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN
> 
> Absolutely nobody guessed the true identity of AhoyWeirdness which I'm happy about! There have been little hints along the way - look back and see if you can find them!
> 
> As always, bonus points if you guess who the new users in the chatroom are!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan has his first date with AhoyWeirdness and Kdin continues to plan his boyfriend's surprise birthday party.

“Hi, I’m Jordan.”

Ryan stared at the male sat across from him in total bewilderment for a moment. He couldn’t remember ever seeing him before, not around the apartment complex, not at any of Barbara’s parties, nothing. The guy was a total stranger to him and that just befuddled him. He had been _so_ sure that 4B and AhoyWeirdness were one the same and yet here he was, being proven wrong.

“It’s nice to finally met you, your highness,” Jordan said, apparently either oblivious to the look on shock on Ryan’s face or simply undeterred by it. He held his hand out, waiting for him to shake it and that action was what finally snapped Ryan back to reality. Reaching out, he took the other’s hand and gave it a firm shake.

“It’s Ryan, please,” he corrected Jordan, a blush coloring his stubbly cheeks as he noticed the waiter was still with them and had weirdness the total awkwardness of their first meeting. “Uh, would you like a drink?” he asked his date, trying to keep his voice steady in spite of the panic rushing through his mind. As foolish as it sounded he hadn’t even prepared himself for this possibility, he had been so hopeful that the guy he was crushing on in the chatroom was the guy he was crushing on in real life.

No, that would be too simple, wouldn’t it?

“A water would be great,” Jordan replied, flashing the waiter a big smile. There was a certain charm to him that made Ryan feel almost lacking in comparison, not to mention that the colourful bowtie Jordan had on made him look… well, _adorable_. He wasn’t the guy Ryan had expected to be on a date with but it wasn’t like he had ended up with some troll. No, that was probably what Jordan was thinking about him. There had to be almost ten years age difference between them!

“Water for me too,” he told the waiter, glad to send him away so that nobody could witness the trainwreck that was about to occur. Ryan wasn’t good with people when he knew what he was getting himself into but this was a totally different situation. It was a date with a complete stranger and suddenly it felt like all of those times he’d stayed up late talking to AhoyWeirdness had never happened at all.

They had been sat alone in silence for a few seconds after the waiter’s departure when Ryan realized neither of them had said anything. In an attempt to try and make things less awkward, he cleared his throat and asked, “So AhoyWeirdness? What made you come up with that?” He was genuinely curious, the name had always stood out to him because it was different.

“Oh, my last name is Cwierz which is pretty _weird_ so… ahoy weirdness, right?” Jordan explained, laughing nervously. Ryan could make out a slight blush on the younger man’s cheeks and he’d be lying if he said that his heart didn’t flutter a little at the sight. There was really no denying that Jordan was handsome.

“Makes sense,” Ryan agreed, a soft laugh in his words as he shook his head, “I got mine from my nephew. He made me act like a mad king when I was playing Minecraft with him.” It was nice and anonymous enough for the chatroom so that’s why he had chosen it. Clearly he valued his privacy a lot more than people like Lindsay or Barbara did because everyone knew who they were thanks to their usernames.

“Cute!” Jordan’s face lit up with a smile, beaming at him just as their drinks of water were delivered. “I don’t have any siblings so no nephews or nieces. I’d spoil them rotten if I did,” he continued, letting out a wistful sigh.

“Well they can be a pain in the ass when I have to babysit but I love ‘em anyway,” Ryan joked, doing his best to relax. He had gotten himself into this situation and he was going to get himself out of it too. A part of him wanted to run off screaming but Lindsay had some kind of sixth sense when it came to his distress so he didn’t want her knocking down his door and demanding to know what he’d done wrong. No, he had to stick it out and get through this himself.

After they had made their orders, conversation had become far more natural and Ryan was genuinely starting to relax around the younger male. His initial panic had been quelled by Jordan’s easy-going nature and if he ever appeared nervous then his date never pointed it out. He knew it was probably silly that he was the nervous one despite being older but Jordan had probably had more of a dating life in the last year than Ryan had ever had so could he really be blamed for that?

Eventually the topic came full circle and they found themselves talking about the chatroom again. “I think I’ve guessed who most of them are now,” Jordan declared confidently, being very careful not to eat with his mouth full.

“You know I don’t recall ever actually seeing you around,” Ryan admit guiltily. He knew it was the wrong thing to say a moment after he said it and Jordan looked a little upset although he quickly covered that expression up a second later. “I mean at Barb’s parties and stuff. I guess we just kept missing each other,” he added, trying to recover from the awkward situation he had created.

“Probably for the best,” Jordan declared, catching Ryan by surprise, “Barb’s a pretty bad influence on me. I’m normally wasted at her parties and as you probably already guessed, I’m a bit of an idiot when I’m wasted.”

“Not always,” Ryan replied instantly, surprising even himself, “I mean… you made this happen while you were wasted. I’m not sure if I would have had the balls to ask you out any time soon.”

“Doesn’t require balls, just a bit of liquid courage.”

“That it does.”               

 

* * *

 

 Barbara’s apartment had become party central but that was no real surprise. This time though, it wasn’t filled with drunk-out-of-their-mind twenty year olds and free-flowing alcohol but instead a small number of people deep in discussion. The ‘Part Council’ Barbara had called them. Kdin was convinced that she was a little bit crazy. She had to be in order to explain half of the weirdness that came out of her mouth. Despite his reservations about her sanity, Kdin had to admit that Barbara knew how to throw a party and her help with Jeremy’s birthday surprise was invaluable.

Some of the people Barbara had gathered he didn’t even recognize. There was Blaine who always made so much noise at her parties that it was impossible not to know his name, Kara whose chatroom name made her name pretty damn easy to guess, Aaron from across the hall who was always either arguing with his roommate Chris or having incredibly loud sex with anybody who would drop their pants for him and two others that he didn’t recognize. Barbara introduced them as Miles and Arryn and offered absolutely no other details. It wasn’t exactly in her nature to be helpful apparently.

They had been sat around Barb’s coffee table talking decorations for the party when the door burst open and Lindsay strode in, a towering bowl of popcorn held delicately in her hands. “Arriving with a bang. Typical Lindsay,” Kara giggled, quickly rushing over to close the door after the redhead.

“I’d say it was more of a _pop_ ,” Barb interjected, earning a collective groan from the group, “No?”

“No,” Kdin replied firmly, shaking his head at her. There were very few people in the apartment complex that could put up with Barb’s puns and considering he lived only a few doors away from her and had to hear them on a regular basis, he was most definitely not one of them. Lindsay apparently was though, judging by her laugh, but Kdin had always thought Lindsay had an odd sense of humor. Her best friend was a thirty-something-borderline-bear dude after all. Kdin had no idea how that combo worked.

“So lumberjacks, huh?” Lindsay asked, placing the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and settling herself between Aaron and Miles. They moved without question. “That’s pretty rad.”

“I’m gonna be a sexy lumberjack,” Blaine declared loudly, giving Barb an obnoxious wink. She just stuck her tongue out at him.

“Not as sexy as me,” Aaron countered and for the next ten minutes they were locked in a heated debate about who would make the sexier lumberjack until the public vote decided Aaron would and Blaine reluctantly allowed them to move the topic on.

Kdin let out an exasperated sigh. Who knew trying to organize a surprise birthday for his boyfriend would be this difficult?

 

* * *

 

After their rocky start, the rest of the date actually turned out to be rather pleasant. Eventually Ryan forgot about his initial apprehensions and was absorbed in the conversation enough to forget how disappointed he had been at first to see that his date was not actually 4B. The rational part of his brain told him that he had been putting 4B on a pedestal for so long that the real thing probably wouldn’t be able to live up to his expectations anyway and he chose to listen to that part. Jordan was a good guy, he was quirky and funny so Ryan knew he could do a lot worse.

His only worry was that _he_ wasn’t good enough for Jordan. Was he not a total bore in comparison? After all Jordan was an animator for some comedy webseries while he was a lowly technician at some unimportant business company. Where Jordan’s stories all seemed to be exciting and humorous, his all seemed to fall flat on their face in comparison. Ryan came away suddenly well aware of how dull his life must sound to an outsider but to his credit Jordan looked interested throughout and asked enough questions to show that he had actually paid attention. He couldn’t help but feel touched that Jordan had managed to stick with him throughout the monotonous way he had spoken about his life.

Ryan had insisted on paying the bill – it was a date, after all – and they began the walk home to the apartment complex together. For a couple of minutes they walked in silence, Ryan having no idea what to say but before he could begin another lame attempt at conversation, Jordan spoke up again. “You know, you’re not much like I thought you would be.” Immediately Ryan’s panic set in. This was it, Jordan had worked out how boring he was. “You’re quieter, more thoughtful…” He seemed to recognize Ryan’s worried expression then and quickly laughed it off. “Trust me, it’s a good thing. I think you’re great, I do! Plus you’re… well, you know…”

_No, I don’t know._

“You’re really handsome.”

Immediately a blush flared up Ryan’s cheeks and he almost tripped up over his own feet. Jordan’s hands jerked out as if to catch him but luckily Ryan got control of his body before he embarrassed himself too badly. “I, um… wow, that was embarrassing,” Ryan mumbled, his blush getting stronger with every passing second, “I mean _thanks_ , you’re really handsome too. Very… good looking.” Oh god, why was he so awkward all the time? He couldn’t even accept compliments without sounding like a total idiot.

Finally they made it back to the building with only a couple more moments of embarrassment and made it into the elevator just as it was about to close. It was already occupied by three people – a guy with a prominent moustache and a ridiculous amount of tattoos, a blonde woman with several piercings and just as many tattoos as Moustache Guy and an athletic-looking kid who was clearly only just in his twenties as opposed to their late thirties.

“Hey Caleb!” Jordan greeted the younger male, his face filled with warmth again. Seriously, just the way Jordan smiled told Ryan that the boy was too good for him. How could he ever deserve somebody who was as positive as Jordan? “Mr Ramsey, Mrs Ramsey.”

“Hey Jord,” Caleb responded, grinning back at him just as much. When his eyes met Ryan’s though, he seemed to shuffle closer to the guy with the moustache. It was only then that Ryan noticed the moustache guy had his hand on Caleb’s shoulder.

“Jordan please, there’s no need to be so formal! It’s Griffon and Geoff,” the woman told him happily, giving him a big smile before her eyes glanced at Ryan. He couldn’t say he’d ever actually spoken to any of them before and he’d only seen the guy with the moustache at one of Barb’s parties. He was pretty sure he could guess his name on the chatroom though and if Geoff ever found out who _he_ was – well, he highly doubted they’d end up being friends. Moustache had made it pretty clear he wasn’t a fan of the Mad King thanks to a couple kill streaks on GTA V....

“This is Ryan,” Jordan said in introduction, leaving out any explanation for who he actually was. Ryan felt relieved at that and quickly plastered a smile on his face to cover the nerves.

“It’s lovely to meet you, Ryan,” Griffon said with just as much warmth in her tone as Jordan did. She ignored the hand Ryan held out for her to shake and instead moved in to give him a quick hug. He was too stunned to respond and instead found himself staring at Geoff who simply rolled his eyes. “You boys should come over to ours next Friday. We’re having a cocktails night!” she declared as she pulled back, looking between them with a hopeful smile.

Jordan looked from Griffon to Ryan and back again, his eyes practically glowing with excitement. “That sounds great! Thanks Griffon,” he said, turning back to look at Ryan, “What do you think?” A thousand thoughts rushed through Ryan’s head at once at the question. Was this Jordan’s way of saying that he wanted to see him again? Ryan had to admit that the idea certainly seemed appealing.

“Sounds good to me.”

“You sound familiar,” Geoff spoke up suddenly, narrowing his eyes in suspicion at Ryan, “You play GTA?” Luckily the elevator doors reached Jordan’s floor at that exact moment and Ryan was saved from answering by a loud _ding_ as the doors rolled open.

“Well this is me!” Jordan said quickly, sensing the awkward tension between the two men, “See you next Friday, I guess.” With a quick smile he stepped out of the elevator and Ryan found himself following.

“It was lovely to meet--” Griffon started to say as the doors rolled shut on her. Ryan let out the breath he had been holding.

“Walking me to my door? What a perfect gentleman,” Jordan said softly, leading Ryan a short way down the hallway before stopping outside his door. When Ryan saw the number on it, his breath was caught in his throat.

Even as his mind tried to comprehend what was happening, he heard the sound of a door opening behind him and turned to see 4B walking out of his apartment. He froze in the doorway, seeing Ryan first and then Jordan behind him.

“Hey Jordan,” he said in a surprisingly British voice, eyes flickering nervously back to Ryan again. The older male couldn’t even hold his gaze, glancing down at the ground to try and stop himself from blushing.

“Oh hey Gavin. You off out?”

“Being dragged out by Dan. He’s a big meanie like that.”

“Oi, what you sayin’ about me?” a third voice said and Ryan glanced up to see somebody else walking out of 4B, another Brit but of a much more burly frame than Gavin. He clapped the skinnier Brit on the shoulder and smiled at them both. “A bit of fresh air will do him well, no matter what he says. You boys have a good night!” With that he began to steer Gavin down the hallway and out of Ryan’s heart.

So 4B had a boyfriend. Ryan should have guessed. Even after his great date with Jordan he couldn’t help but feel his heart sink.

“I should probably get some sleep,” Jordan declared, snapping Ryan out of his daze, “Got a lot of editing to do tomorrow.”

“That’s… uh, that’s fine. I had a good time. Great, even,” Ryan mumbled in response, hoping Jordan couldn’t tell just how distracted he was.

“Me too.” The big smile Jordan gave him was enough to reassure Ryan for now at least. “So I guess I’ll see you next Friday, huh?”

“Next Friday for sure.”

“I look forward to it.”

“Me too.” Ryan wasn’t sure how honest he was being. The idea of having his second date while surrounded by his date’s friends and somebody who probably wanted to kick his ass? Yeah, that didn’t exactly sound like fun.

Wishing Jordan a final goodnight, Ryan walked back to the elevator and was glad to see it was empty this time around. He took the ride up to the fifth floor in silence and went straight to bed, totally drained from the day’s events.

He didn’t sleep a bit, his brain continuing to replay the events of the date, only this time 4B and his boyfriend were sat a few tables away and Ryan couldn’t stop staring. Why was he so pathetic to wish that 4B wanted him when he had a perfectly nice boy who apparently wanted a second date?

For the first time ever Ryan all but stormed into Lindsay’s apartment, refused to let her sleep and demanded she play some Street Fighter with him. She didn’t even ask why. Apparently he wasn’t the only one with something on his mind.

They didn’t stop playing for the rest of the night.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Relationships in the chatroom aren't always as great as they seem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the wait on this chapter! Life's kind of crazy right now with finishing uni and everything but I promise to not let you wait so long for a chapter in the future. Anyway, this is just a quick catch up on the rest of the fic's relationships!

**Kickass_Kara:** hey pun can I ask a personal question?

 **Punkelman:** Sure can do my friend!

 **Kickass_Kara:** what’s going on between you and rock?

 **Kickass_Kara:** like are you just banging or dating or ???

 **Punkelman:** Who says we’re doing anything at all?

 **Kickass_Kara:** common sense

 **Kickass_Kara:** don’t deny it! we all know there’s something going on there!

 **Punkelman:** Ok fine!

 **Punkelman:** It’s just sex

 **Punkelman:** At least for me it is

 **Kickass_Kara:** and for him?

 **Punkelman:** I have no idea

 **Punkelman:** You’d have to ask him

 **Punkelman:** (please don’t do that)

 

* * *

 

 **MoreKeys:** yo rock how did you bag pun anyway?

 **MoreKeys:** I’m like 1000% gay and even I know she’s slammin

 **TheRockJr:** ur def missing a few 00’s from that

 **TheRockJr:** it’s just my incredibly good looks

 **MoreKeys:** riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight

 **TheRockJr:** no lie

 **MoreKeys:** whens the wedding?

 **TheRockJr:** WE’RE NOT GETTING MARRIED

 **MoreKeys:** I meant you and your ego ;)

_[THEROCKJR is now offline]_

 

* * *

 

 **RedRidingHood:** ASH! I NEED THE GOSSIP

 **RedRidingHood:** WHAT’S GOING ON WITH YOU AND BURNIE?

 **AshJenx:** Fourth date tomorrow night!

 **RedRidingHood:** ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh soooo jealous

 **RedRidingHood:** is he a good kisser?

 **AshJenx:** Hell yeah he is. You should be jealous!

 **RedRidingHood:** I am, I really am!

 **AshJenx:** What about you? Any cuties on the horizon?

 **RedRidingHood:** Ehhh I dunno

 **RedRidingHood:** I liked this girl for ages… don’t think she’s into me tho :/

 **AshJenx:** Screw that, go for it!

 **AshJenx:** You’ll never know if you don’t try!

 **RedRidingHood:** Ehhh we’ll see

 

* * *

 

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** excited for tomorrow? :D

 **LittleKovic:** honestly?

 **LittleKovic:** no

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** ???????????????????

 **LittleKovic:** I’m not big on birthdays

 **LittleKovic:** they usually go terribly

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** this year could be different tho!

 **LittleKovic:** doubt it

 **LittleKovic:** think Kdin’s taking me somewhere

 **LittleKovic:** we’ll see

 **LittleKovic:** anyway whats up with you? You’ve been weird lately

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** no I haven’t! :o

 **LittleKovic:** I hear you creeping back in at 3am most nights

 **LittleKovic:** secret girlfriend?

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** oh no my food is ready I gotta go bye

 _[FRISBEELOVESYOU_ _is now offline]_

 **LittleKovic:** SECRET GIRLFRIEND I KNEW IT :D

 

* * *

 

**TuggLife:** soooooooooo excited for the party tomorrow!

**SoKdoneWithYou:** me too!

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** just hopes Jeremy likes it

 **TuggLife:** chill bud he totally will

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** well fingers crossed anyway

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** you know if MJ is gonna be there?

 **TuggLife:** uh yeah I think so

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** any progress there?

 **TuggLife:** I don’t know :/

 **TuggLife:** it’s just kinda awkward right now and I don’t know why

 **TuggLife:** like he’s holding back or sth

 **TuggLife:** I dunno maybe I’m overanalysing

 **TuggLife:** I mean this is my first relationship whatever in like

 **TuggLiffe:** forever

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** now I get to tell you to chill

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** things will work out

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** if not I’m sure the mad king with marry you

 **TuggLife:** don’t be so sure

 **TuggLife:** he has a date to the party after all ;)

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** HE DOES?!?!

 **TuggLife:** he does :D

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

**Mad_King:** Hey guys!

 **SoKdoneWithYou:** APPLES

 **TuggLife:** CHLAMIDYA

 **Mad_King:** …

 **Mad_King:** Bye guys.

_[MAD_KING is now offline]_

**TuggLife:** close call!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG GUYS, I PROMISE NOT TO MAKE YOU WAIT SO LONG FOR CHAPTERS AGAIN

**Mad_King:** So Tugg and I are having a drinks/gaming thing before the party and I was wondering if you wanted to come over?

_[NOBODY ELSE IS ONLINE. YOU ARE TALKING TO YOURSELF. LOSER.]_

**Mad_King:** Want to come over for a drink before the party? Lindsay will be there too so don’t worry about it being just us…

_[NOBODY ELSE IS ONLINE. YOU ARE TALKING TO YOURSELF. NERD.]_

**Mad_King:** Pre-party gaming session in 5C, you in?

_[NOBODY ELSE IS ONLINE. YOU ARE TALKING TO YOURSELF. GET A LIFE.]_

**Mad_King:** Fuck this.

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now online]_

**AhoyWeirdness:** Hello?

 **Mad_King:** Hi!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Your Highness!

 **Mad_King:** I’ve always wondered why this chatbox doesn’t have an ‘online users’ menu. It would make things so much easier.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Ask Barb.

 **Mad_King:** Are you telling me Punkelman made this chatbox?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Yup.

 **Mad_King:** Wow. That actually explains a lot.

 **Mad_King:** Anyway I had a question for you!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Yesssssssss O_o

 **Mad_King:** You’re going to Jeremy’s ‘surprise’ party, right?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I think Barb would gut me if I didn’t so yes.

 **Mad_King:** Well

 **Mad_King:** Would you perhaps

 **Mad_King:** Want to come over for some gaming and drinks before the party?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** At yours?

 **Mad_King:** Well at Tugg’s which is across from mine.

 **Mad_King:** I think MJ’s going too.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Sweet I love the King of Pop!

 **Mad_King:** …

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I’m sorry?

 **Mad_King:** You’re forgiven… for now.

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Dun dun DUUUUUUUUUUUN

 

* * *

Ryan turned up at Lindsay’s door at five to seven, approximately five minutes before Jordan was supposed to meet them for their pre-party gaming session, only to pause at the door. Without even having to lean in her could hear heated words being exchanged. It was clearly Lindsay and MJ and listening in made Ryan feel guilty so he pulled back from the door and frowned. Was he supposed to interrupt them and jump to Lindsay’s defence?

No, that wouldn’t be right. This was a private couple matter. It had nothing to do with him and definitely not Jordan. He didn’t need to have this be his first experience of Ryan’s best friend so _yeah, no_ – this whole thing wasn’t happening.

Of course at that exact moment there was a loud ‘ding!’ from the elevator and the doors rolled open to reveal Jordan, dressed in a nicely ironed check shirt with a red bowtie. His hair was swooped back making him look extra suave and Ryan would be lying if he said that Jordan’s whole appearance in that moment didn’t make him do a double take.

“Hi!” Jordan said, a pink blush on his cheeks as he felt Ryan’s intense blue eyes taking him in, “Am I too early?”

For a moment Ryan struggled to find his voice. In their last meeting he had been too caught up in the fact Jordan _wasn’t_ 4B to notice really just how handsome the young man was. “Uh no, just-- they want some private time so we should probably just hang out at mine for now?” he suggested when he finally found his voice again. The last thing they needed was to walk in during the middle of an argument, especially considering just how angry both of them had sounded. “If you don’t mind?”

Jordan flashed him a brilliant smile that made Ryan feel even more guilty for his initial disappointment over AhoyWeirdness’ identity. “That sounds good to me!” he said cheerily, following Ryan back into his apartment.

They spent the next hour drinking whatever alcohol they could find in Ryan’s cupboards while playing Super Smash Bros. Ryan found himself surprised just how natural it felt.

 

* * *

The party was going fine until Jeremy showed up. They had all gathered in the apartment he shared with Kdin after Barbara had sent a text round warning them that the boys would be home soon. Ryan couldn’t help but notice that Lindsay and MJ were absent. Then, once they had all hidden as best as they could around the apartment, they waited.

Ryan found himself crouched down behind the sofa with Barbara and Miles, who he was meeting properly for the first time. He quickly learned that Miles was just as odd offline as he was in the chatroom. He wasn’t quite sure where Jordan had ended up but that didn’t stop him from coming up in conversation.

“So you and Jordan, huh?” Barbara asked, wagging her eyebrows at him in a way that Ryan had tried many times but never succeeded to do.

“What about us?” he asked, trying to play dumb.

“You two touching dicks yet?”

“Wait who?” Miles pitched in, causing Ryan to let out an aggravated sigh. This really wasn’t going to go well, was it?

“Ryan and Jordan. They’re _boyfriends_ ,” Barb told him in a childlike voice, giggles and all.

“We’re not boyfriends!” Ryan said, probably a little too loudly. He just hoped Jordan hadn’t heard it. “We went on one date, okay?!”

Barbara didn’t immediately reply, she just stared at him long and hard as if she was somehow looking through his skull and directly into his brain. It made him feel a little uncomfortable because if anybody had that power it was probably Barb.

“What?”

He never got an answer because in that moment the door opened and everybody jumped up to scream “SURPRISE!” at the top of their lungs. Jeremy was frozen in the doorway, eyes wide in shock, with Kdin grinning behind him.

And then Jeremy turned to his boyfriend, looked him dead in the eyes and growled, “You fuckin’ asshole.”

A laugh went around the room, nobody but Ryan apparently noticing that Jeremy didn’t look like he was joking. He looked genuinely upset and angry. Kdin’s grin faltered somewhat before outright dropping when Jeremy barged past him and stormed out.

For a moment nobody said anything. This had to be a joke Jeremy was playing, right? When he didn’t come back to finish the joke though that idea quickly fell to the wayside. It was now Kdin’s turn to be frozen to the spot, staring at the crowd who stared back at him expectantly.

“I’ll, uh, be right back,” he mumbled before quickly fleeing the room.

Again, more silence. Ryan was getting convinced he could still hear the sounds of Lindsay and MJ arguing through the ceiling until Barbara cleared her throat and spoke up. “Alright, let’s party!”

Apparently nobody else was concerned that they were throwing a party in somebody else’s apartment because everybody cheered and started breaking open the bottles of beer and blasting the music through Jeremy’s fancy speaker system. Ryan only felt slightly awkward for a few moments before he decided to make his speedy escape from Barbara and Miles. It was probably for the best because Miles looked like he was about to bombard him with questions. Or maybe he always looked like he was always on the verge of exploding.

 

* * *

Jeremy was _furious_.

It wasn’t like he and Kdin disagreed over much and they definitely didn’t argue but he couldn’t stop himself. They had been together for two years now, Kdin should have known how much Jeremy hated big parties where he was the centre of attention and surprise parties were the worst. He didn’t want that sort of attention.

The worst part of it though was that Kdin was acting like he hadn’t done anything wrong.

“Come on, it’s just a party! They’re all here to celebrate _you!_ ” Kdin assured him, trying to hold Jeremy’s hand only to have it sharply pulled back.

“I don’t _want_ to be celebrated!” Jeremy fired back, moving away to put some distance between them both. “Besides, I don’t even know half of those people! They’re not my friends, they’re yours!”

“Come on, Jer, that’s crap! They’re your friends too!”

“I said Trevor creeps me out because he looks like a serial killer. Miles is probably a little bit unstable. Kara tripped me up and I fell down a flight of stairs. Why are any of them here?!”

Kdin took a step forward, closing the distance Jeremy had just placed between them. He did his best to speak softly but the struggle to stay calm was obvious in his voice: “You’re overreacting, Dooley! You’ve always been fine with them.”

If it was even possible, Jeremy’s expression darkened further. “I’ve been fine with them _for you_. Just like I said we could get a cat for you or that purple is a totally acceptable color to paint the bedroom. I do everything for you and I just wanted this one night for _us_ and again, it had to be about you!”

Kdin looked like he’d been slapped in the face. Strangely that expression filled Jeremy with the most satisfaction and happiness that he’d felt in weeks – hell, maybe even months.

“I—this isn’t about me, I promise,” Kdin said quietly, his gaze drifting towards Jeremy’s feet.

“Whatever,” his boyfriend sighed, shaking his head, “Go enjoy your party.”

By the time Kdin looked up Jeremy was already walking out of the apartment building’s lobby.

 

* * *

 

Meg knew that coming to this party was a bad idea. For one thing she had no idea who Jeremy Dooley actually was and had only actually interacted with his boyfriend once on the chatroom but Barb had convinced her that it would be good for her.

It was either this or sitting alone in her apartment eating pizza and wishing that her best friend was as gay for her as she was for Ashley. Well, maybe it wasn’t just Ashley that Meg was a bit gay for because _hello, bisexual pride_ and everything but Ashley had practically owned her heart for a year now and nothing was ever going to happen because Ashley had some hot older boyfriend who was taking her out on hot dates and doing everything that Meg wished she could be doing with and to Ashley. So yeah, either way Meg was going to be wallowing in her self-pity but at least this way involved alcohol and some mild distractions.

Case in point: Patrick from the floor above her was talking to some athlete friend of Blaine’s and it had suddenly become a priority for Meg to snoop on their conversation. She and Patrick ran the building’s LGBT society and she knew all about his lack of dating prowess so the fact he was getting along with a random hottie made her want to squeal with excitement. Seriously, this guy was hot with his dark stubble and his lean muscles. He probably ran or something. Maybe he played tennis. Either way he would be good for Patrick and Meg was fully prepared to cheerleader it this very second.

Feeling somebody sit down beside her, Meg turned to see Aaron making himself comfortable while managing to down two beers at once. It was impressive but she wouldn’t expect any less of him. At first she’d dismissed Aaron as just another straight dudebro but there was surprisingly more to him than that. His sexuality seemed to be fluid at the best of times – one week he’d be all about chasing dick and the next he’d swear he’d never given a blowjob before. Meg chose not to question it too much. People could do whatever the hell they wanted to do.

“Not enjoying yourself?” he asked her, enough of a slur to his voice that told Meg he was drunk as hell and probably wouldn’t remember this the next day. That was probably best because she’d had a drink too and she knew how loose-lipped she could be when she had alcohol in her system.

“Eh, it’s kind of a hot mess,” she joked, shrugging her shoulders before letting out a small sigh and adding, “Kinda like my life right now…”

Much to her surprise, Aaron moved one of his strong arms around her shoulder and pulled her in close against his chest. Sure, he managed to spill a bit of one of his beers over her in the process but it was the thought that counted or something like that. “It’s fine,” he assured her, all but murmuring into the top of her head, “We’ll be hot messes together.”

They were making out approximately ten minutes later.

 

* * *

 

Ryan found Jordan a few minutes after Barbara announced that the party was going ahead despite the birthday boy no longer being present. Of course who else would he be talking to than the boy in 4B who had plagued Ryan’s thoughts for so long?

“Ryan, hey!” Jordan greeted, sounding and looking exactly like an excited puppy. Ryan would be lying if he said it didn’t have an effect on him because it did, he just wasn’t quite sure what.

“Hi,” he replied somewhat nervously, shoving both hands deep in his pockets. Were they supposed to hug or even kiss? No, it seemed too early for that. Besides, Jordan had company and that company was a guy Ryan had been secretly crushing on for too damn long.

“You’re 5D, right?” Gavin asked him, delightfully British and easily reawakening the torch in Ryan’s heart. _Fuck_. This was never supposed to happen.

“Uh yeah. You’re 4B, aren’t you?” Ryan wasn’t sure why he’d even asked that. He’d known Gavin was the boy in 4B for a long time, he’d just never known his name until he’d been on his date with Jordan.

“That’s me!” Gavin seemed so proud of himself that his grin was infectious.

Ryan knew that Jordan was watching him though, so he quickly turned his attention back to the boy he supposed was something like his boyfriend. “Having a good time?”

“It’s alright. Wonder what happened to Jeremy?”

“There must be something in the water,” Gavin pitched in, holding his beer so casually that Ryan was worried it was about to spill all over the floor, “Cuz everybody’s being a moody shit these days. Don’t even get me started on Dan…”

And with the mention of Gavin’s boyfriend, Ryan’s heart was pierced all over again.

 

* * *

The party lasted about an hour and a half before Kdin skulked back in and had a huge tantrum, throwing everybody but Barbara out. Seeing the usually calm nerdy kid flip out like that had everybody running for the hills.

Meg and Aaron stumbled out hand-in-hand and only had to walk two doors down before they had reached Aaron’s apartment which they quickly but not quietly disappeared inside of.

Patrick, ever the perfect gentleman, walked Blaine’s athlete friend to the lobby doors and saw him safely into a taxi before doing a little dance on the sidewalk in celebration.

Miles rounded up a whole bunch of the party-goers to move to an afterparty in his apartment. No matter how many times he asked Caleb if he wanted to come over and party with the rest of them, the boy seemed far more interested in slipping off unnoticed. The last time Miles saw him Caleb had been getting into the elevator with a blonde lady that looked equal parts sexy and terrifying. He decided not to push his luck.

Gavin had disappeared fairly early on, probably to go find Dan, so Ryan spent the rest of the party talking with Jordan and even walked him back to his apartment door. He couldn’t shake the thought that Jordan deserved better than him though. Jordan was funny and charming and cute and yet Ryan couldn’t keep his eyes or his thoughts straight.

Apparently he was a bigger fuck-up in love than he’d realized.

Reaching the fifth floor, Ryan paused outside Lindsay’s door. It was quiet inside now and knowing that his curiosity wouldn’t let it go, he knocked. For a few moments there were no sounds of response and he was beginning to think that giving up would be wise because lord knows what was going on in that apartment, but then the door opened and he saw that Lindsay’s face was puffy and red from crying.

He didn’t even say anything, he just pulled her into his arms and held her in the tightest embrace he could. She fell against him willingly, burying her head in his chest as she wrapped her arms around him. Her voice was so muffled by his shirt that he couldn’t understand half of what she was sobbing.

It was only when she shifted her head ever so slightly that he heard the words, “The asshole’s moving back to Jersey.” Oh.

Turned out he wasn’t the only fuck-up in love that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is unbeta'd as always so if any of you (Andy) find any mistakes/inconsistencies then feel free to let me know and I'll fix them!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY LOOK, ANOTHER CHAPTER!

The weeks that followed Jeremy’s surprise party weren’t particular kind to anybody. Ryan noticed it fairly quickly, what with living opposite a now permanently miserable Lindsay. She spent most days in his apartment, lazing about on his couch and totally destroying his kill/death ratio in Destiny. He supposed he couldn’t hold it against her, even if he did flinch every time she got his Guardian killed by using the wrong weapons. There was a very strict way to play the Crucible and he thought it would be impolite to try and correct her when she was already nearing bloodthirsty at the best of times. Better not to risk it.

Instead of bothering her, he spent his time in between work and the chatroom. After all, what else would he be doing with his life? As always work was super slow and Burnie only came in once to ask him questions about Ashley he had no answers to so other than that Ryan was left to himself. He’d get messages from Jordan every now and then but ever since Jeremy’s party he’d felt a bit uneasy around the other boy. Had Jordan noticed the way he’d looked at Gavin or overheard him telling Barbara that they weren’t actually boyfriends? He certainly didn’t show any signs of knowing either but Ryan was neurotic, he couldn’t help it.

Luckily losing himself in the chatroom was much easier than confronting his own problems.

 

* * *

 

_[MAD_KING is now online]_

**AshJenx:** Ryan, hey!

 **Mad_King:** I notice we’re abandoning all pretences of hiding our identities then.

 **AshJenx:** Well it seems a bit weird considering how many parties we’ve all had together now.

 **AshJenx:** Speaking of! I heard Jeremy’s surprise party didn’t go well?

 **Mad_King:** You could say that…

 **AshJenx:** That bad, huh?

_[LIGHTOFTHEMOON is now online]_

**Mad_King:** Really bad and VERY awkward.

 **LightOfTheMoon:** it is i!

 **AshJenx:** Hey Miles!

 **Mad_King:** Oh hi Miles.

 **LightOfTheMoon:** really bad and very awkward?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** were you talking about me?!?!?! :O

 **AshJenx:** Jeremy’s party

 **LightOfTheMoon:** ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 **LightOfTheMoon:** shit son

 **LightOfTheMoon:** i mean i dont remember most of that night but yeah it was awks

 **Mad_King:** Didn’t you throw an afterparty?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** yup hence not remembering much

 **LightOfTheMoon:** pretty sure i saw mj turn up though

 **LightOfTheMoon:** anybody know why he was more of an asshole than usual???

 **AshJenx:** Nope

 **Mad_King:** No idea!

 **AshJenx:** Ryan, how are things with him and Lindsay?

 **Mad_King:** Totally fine…

 **LightOfTheMoon:** THERES A BUT THERE

 **Mad_King:** No there’s not!

 **AshJenx:** Give us the but, Ryan! What do you know?!

 **Mad_King:** Oh hey your boyfriend’s in my office again. I gotta run!

 **AshJenx:** Ask him if he liked the sandwich I made him!

 **Mad_King:** It’s Burnie, he likes any kind of sandwich!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** ashley has a boyfriend???

 **Mad_King:** Anyway I have actual work to do so bye.

_[MAD_KING is now offline]_

**AshJenx:** There was DEFINITELY a but there!

 

* * *

 

 **TheRockJr:** does anybody know who patrick is????

 **Kickass_Kara:** I don’t think so?

 **FuckYouAll:** No. I don’t want to know Patrick either.

 **Kickass_Kara:** should I?

 **Xrayyy:** n followed by o followed by p followed by e

 **TheRockJr:** …ray really?

 **Kickass_Kara:** was that worth typing out?

 **Xrayyy:** YES

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** I know Patrick ☺

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** he lives two doors down from me

 **FuckYouAll:** Don’t worry, Ray.

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** 3D

 **FuckYouAll:** When you’re dead I’ll love your mom for you.

 **Kickass_Kara:** …

 **Xrayyy:** joel plz :’(

 **TheRockJr:** anyway

 **TheRockJr:** my buddy kyle was talking to him at the shitshow of a party

 **TheRockJr:** he was too drunk to give Patrick his number

 **TheRockJr:** so now im messenger boy :/

 **Kickass_Kara:** WAIT A SECOND

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** DM me his number and i’ll give it to him?

 **TheRockJr:** sure

 **Kickass_Kara:** is that why Kyle wouldn’t go out with me? he’s GAY?!??!?!

 **TheRockJr:** OH we still on for UF on Thursday?

 **Xrayyy:** shoutout to ultimate fucking

 **TheRockJr:** and yup kara but it was funny to see u try and get his attention

 **Xrayyy:** caleb and blaine… i ship it

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** Ultimate FRISBEE, Ray! -_-

 **Xrayyy:** I see through your code Caleb

 **Xrayyy:** I know what you two are doing

 **TheRockJr:** caleb’s not my type

 **TheRockJr:** too many dicks, too few boobs

 **Xrayyy:** wait how many dicks does caleb have?

 **FuckYouAll:** Seven.

 **FrisbeeWithYou:** One, thank you very much! :O

 **FuckYouAll:** Not counting the one I have in Ray’s mom.

 **Xrayyy:** you put one of caleb’s dicks into my mom?

 **Xrayyy:** I’m scared

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** but yes Blaine, Frisbee is still on!

 **TheRockJr:** cool

 **TheRockJr:** sent u kyle’s number

 **FrisbeeLovesYou:** and now I’m leaving before things get any weirder…

[ _FRISBEELOVESYOU is now offline]_

 **FuckYouAll:** Ray, what type of cake does your mom like?

 **Xrayyy:** i’m not telling you!

 **FuckYouAll:** Fine.

 **FuckYouAll:** I guess I’ll have to use my SPECIAL INGREDIENT.

 **Xrayyy:** STRAWBERRIES

 **Xrayyy:** SHE LIKES STRAWBERRIES

 **FuckYouAll:** Thank you.

 

* * *

 

 **RedRidingHood:** I don’t think we should tell anyone about the other night…

 **MoreKeys:** that’s cool

 **MoreKeys:** any particular reason why?

 **MoreKeys:** it wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain girl

 **MoreKeys:** whose name you called out when I was eating you out?

 **RedRidingHood:** AARON I S2G

 **MoreKeys:** like no judgment

 **MoreKeys:** I was thinking of chris when you gave me head

 **RedRidingHood:** …as in your roommate Chris?

 **MoreKeys:** as in straight roommate Chris

 **MoreKeys:** straight roommate Chris who’s been after Kara since she moved in

 **MoreKeys:** so yeah I know what it’s like

 **RedRidingHood:** Shit I had no idea

 **RedRidingHood:** I’m sorry :/

 **MoreKeys:** it’s fine

 **MoreKeys:** and don’t worry your secret is safe with me

 **MoreKeys:** but do you wanna do tequila shots later?

 **RedRidingHood:** Sure

 **RedRidingHood:** You’re paying though!

 **MoreKeys:** it’s a deal

 **RedRidingHood:** and no thinking about Chris when I go down on you later

 **RedRidingHood:** no offence but I’d be a way hotter guy than him

_[GUS_SOROLA is now online]_

**MoreKeys:** only if you don’t think about Ashley when I eat you out

 **RedRidingHood:** …

 **Gus_Sorola:** THAT IS FILTH

 **Gus_Sorola:** THIS IS PUBLIC YOU KNOW

 **Gus_Sorola:** THE GOVERNMENT IS WATCHING AND JUDGING YOU

 **Gus_Sorola:** AND SO IS GUS

 **MoreKeys:** um

 **MoreKeys:** bye

_[MOREKEYS is now offline]_

**Gus_Sorola:** DON’T YOU WALK AWAY FROM YOU

 **Gus_Sorola:** YOU YALDSON

 **RedRidingHood:** What does that even mean?

 **RedRidingHood:** Wait I don’t want to be left alone with you

_[REDRIDINGHOOD is now offline]_

**Gus_Sorola:** YOU’RE ALL FILTH

 **Gus_Sorola:** ISIS COULD BE WATCHING

 

* * *

 

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Has anybody spoken to Jeremy since the party?

 **HeirOfIsildur:** has anybody even SEEN him?

 **BigJeremy:** My mini-me is missing?! :O

 **HeirOfIsildur:** or Kdin for that matter???

 **BigJeremy:** Unacceptable

 **Punkelman:** Him and Kdin are going through some issues

 **Punkelman:** I don’t think he’s staying in their apartment right now

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Oh no ☹

 **HeirOfIsildur:** man that sucks

 **HeirOfIsildur:** the party was actually pretty fun

 **HeirOfIsildur:** I mean for us at least

 **BigJeremy:** I wouldn’t know

 **BigJeremy:** SOMEBODY DIDN’T INVITE ME TO MY TWIN’S BIRTHDAY

 **Punkleman:** YOU WERE WITH YOUR BOYFRIENDS STFU I SAW YOUR FB FEED

 **Punkelman:** Also I want a Matt Peake for my pocket

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Don’t we all?

 **Punkelman:** I’m stealing him

 **BigJeremy:** OVER MY DEAD BODY, DUNKELMAN

 **Punkelman:** game

 **Punkelman:** motherfuckin

 **Punkelman:** on

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I’ll let you fight this one out

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I already have a giant dorky teddybear of my own

_[GAVINOFREE is now online]_

**GavinoFree:** Hi guys! Finally worked out how to use this thing!

 **Punkelman:** GAAAAAAAVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

 

* * *

 

 **Jordan** says: _We still on for Friday at the Ramseys? x_

Ryan stared at the text he was reading long and hard as if the eight-word message was part of some impossible decision. In a way, it was. He knew that he wasn’t good enough for Jordan. A guy that nice deserved somebody who wasn’t half-living in a fantasy world at any given moment or somebody who wasn’t so neurotic that they’d spent the last week double-guessing every single interaction they’d had with a human being. Jordan deserved somebody who hadn’t been hoping he was somebody else.

Still, Ryan also knew that he was never going to get Gavin and maybe one day he wouldn’t even have to think about it. He could like Jordan for Jordan instead of feeling jealous of Gavin’s relationship with that other British guy. He’d been tall and buff and handsome so of course Ryan felt jealous of him. That was exactly the kind of guy that deserved Gavin though – and hell, he was the type of guy that Jordan deserved too. Not _him_.

He didn’t like letting people down though and the thought of upsetting Jordan was so soul-crushing that he knew he was too much of a coward to admit his doubts. With his mind made up, Ryan swallowed his better judgment and typed out his reply -

 **Ryan** says: _Wouldn’t miss it for the world! ☺_ _x_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Andy beta this plz
> 
> I now have the rest of the story mapped out and I know the ending for definite, endgame ships and all! There will be 20 chapters so you still have another six after this, never fear...


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner at the Ramseys' doesn't go so well for Ryan.

Ryan was pretty sure he hadn’t been this nervous when he’d handed in his final paper at university nor when he was first sat in front of Burnie for a job interview and not even before his first date with Jordan. Having dinner with Jordan’s friends seemed so much more terrifying than all of those moments combined and yeah, he was nervous.

The invitation to join the Ramseys for dinner seemed like an age ago when in truth it had barely been a fortnight. Jeremy’s birthday party had sort of cancelled the initial dinner plans and Griffon had sent a message to Jordan to reschedule. If anything the delay made Ryan even more nervous. The nerves had time to build up and while he knew that nothing really bad was going to happen, he couldn’t help but imagine that Griffon’s husband with the twirly moustache would throttle him to death over the dinner table for some reason or other. Ryan was still keeping his mouth closed about their GTA Online meeting because he rather liked the idea of continuing to have working legs.

Jordan was an observant guy. It was something Ryan had picked up on quite quickly – he had observed Jordan’s observance, so to speak – and he knew that Jordan had taken notice of his nerves. Even though Ryan had been a big-time drama geek back at school he wasn’t quite as good at hiding his emotions and acting like he was totally fine as he used to be.

“You’re gonna be fine, big guy. No need to worry,” Jordan assured him on the elevator ride up to the sixth floor. It wasn’t a very long ride considering he only lived on the floor below and Ryan was actually pretty thankful because his nerves didn’t need any more time to fester than they’d already had. Jordan’s words calmed him only slightly but Ryan was certain that he’d probably feel better if this whole dinner was simply not a thing that was happening to him.

They arrived at the door to apartment 6A to find that the door was slightly propped open. Ryan could already hear the sounds of people talking inside, including one unforgettable British accent. For a moment his breath was caught in his throat and he froze. Jordan gave him a strange expression before taking his hand and all but dragging him inside.

For such a tall woman who was almost as covered in tattoos as her husband was, Griffon exuded a large amount of warmth that Ryan honestly hadn’t expected from her. He wasn’t quite sure what it was about her but he could almost understand why Jordan was so fond of her from the way she smiled at them as they entered the apartment, extended her arms as if to hug them both and exclaimed happily, “Boys, welcome! We were beginning to think you weren’t coming!”

Truth be told they were only late because Ryan had changed his shirt no less than four times. He wasn’t sure if there was a dress code and was too nervous to ask Jordan. In the end he’d settled for a navy blue shirt but decided to leave the tie in his apartment. For the record Jordan looked as dapper as ever in a pink shirt and grey suit jacket. Ryan wasn’t quite sure how he managed to look so effortless with his fashion choices all the time but it was actually sort of amazing to behold.

“We’re here now, no need to worry!” Jordan assured her, accepting her hug. Ryan stood beside them, glancing past Griffon into the rest of the apartment. It was a lot more decorated than either his or Lindsay’s apartments were and almost every inch of the walls was covered by a photo of some sort. Ryan recognized Griffon and her husband in most of them but others featured Gavin and Caleb. Even Jordan, Kdin and Jeremy were in a few.

“Nice to see you again, Ryan,” Griffon said welcomingly, drawing his attention back to her. He didn’t get much of a choice as he was pulled into a quick hug. Jordan just beamed at him, clearly eager to see him get along with his friends.

“Uh, nice to see you too!” Ryan replied after a pause, hoping he sounded at least a little convincing. While Griffon’s friendliness had calmed him down a little, he was still a little anxious for what the rest of the evening would hold in store for him.

As if on cue, Griffon’s husband rounded the corner and immediately locked eyes with Ryan who was currently still being embraced by Griffon. “Jordan,” the man said gruffly, nodding at the younger male. Griffon pulled away and smiled at her husband without missing a beat.

“Geoff, this is Ryan, Jordan’s boyfriend. You’ve met before, remember?” she introduced, waving him over. Ryan felt himself tense slightly as he forced his face into a tight smile. He could tell that Jordan was watching him closely as if expecting even more of a reaction for him but right now Ryan was too busy pulling all his courage together to stop himself from turning on his heels and running out the door.

Geoff took a few steps closer, eyes narrowing ever so slightly. Ryan felt a shiver go down his spine. “Yeah. I remember,” he said in a low tone as he came to a stop barely a foot away from Ryan.

Then, Geoff seemed to relax into a smile and offered his hand. “Nice to see you again, buddy!” he said cheerily, creeping Ryan out even more. This had to be some sort of prank being pulled on him, right?

“Same,” he choked out, shaking the other man’s hand with only minor hesitance. Both Jordan and Griffon seemed to be happy about it though so he supposed he was doing a good job. He just needed to relax a bit more.

The Ramseys welcomed them into the dining room where two others were already sat at an extraordinarily long table. Both Gavin and Caleb looked up and smiled at them as they entered the room but Jordan seemed more pre-occupied looking at the table and the empty chairs. “Are Jeremy and Kdin not coming?” he asked suddenly.

Griffon suddenly looked guilty. “Well… they’re going through some issues right now and we thought it might be best to just leave them be right now,” she explained as she ushered Jordan and Ryan into their seats. Much to Ryan’s dismay he was sat directly opposite Gavin. Of course fate would choose to do that to him. “We didn’t want to show any favouritism by inviting one or the other so this was the only compromise we could think of.”

Ryan supposed that was the most sensible decision she could have made but then again he knew absolutely no idea how this friendship group – or whatever the hell they were – actually worked. Hell, he didn’t even know Jeremy and Kdin at all so he was still sort of confused why he’d even been invited to their birthday party other than the fact Barbara had a habit of inviting everybody to her parties. Maybe Jordan had something to do with it. Hell, he hadn’t even known that Jordan had known the other men all that well.

“Do we even know what’s going on with them?” Jordan asked curiously as he tucked a napkin into the collar of his shirt. Ryan couldn’t help but smile. How was he so goddamn adorable?

“Jeremy doesn’t like big parties,” Caleb offered before shrugging. “Doesn’t seem like that’s something that would split them up though.”

“They _haven’t_ split up!” Geoff interjected with a surprising fierceness to his tone. Caleb seemed to shrink back in his seat a little more before Geoff relaxed and gave him a reassuring smile. Ryan just glanced in Jordan’s direction, more than a little confused. Jordan just smiled pleasantly and changed the topic, addressing Gavin about some UK politics thing. Ryan wasn’t quite sure why Jordan kept up with foreign politics but okay, if that’s how he wanted to roll. He’d already proven himself to be a rather unique individual so why not.

Conversation flowed without any hiccups like that. Ryan didn’t offer much unless he was specifically addressed and most of those times were Griffon. She was very good at her hosting duties, always making sure that their glasses were full up and there was food on their plates if they wanted it.

After Griffon started to get up for what was probably the tenth time that meal to get some more drinks for everybody Geoff all but forced her back into her seat and declared that he would do it. Caleb offered to help and they disappeared down the hall just as Gavin turned to Ryan and asked, “So Ryan! Do you think that in a parallel universe you might be taller or shorter?”

The question was enough to make Ryan pause for a good ten seconds as his brain tried to process it. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if it was an actual question. “I… don’t think so?” he replied finally, so flummoxed by what he’d been asked that he couldn’t even think of a logical reason why not.

“So you don’t think there’s a universe where everybody’s like a foot shorter?”

“No, not really? I mean, why would there be?”

They continued like this for a short while, Gavin asking absolutely absurd questions and Ryan struggling to give them a proper answer without having a total meltdown. Griffon and Jordan interjected a couple of times but they mostly sat by and watched in bemusement as Ryan grew more and more perplexed at the questions being thrown his way.

Eventually he excused himself for a bathroom break, only to realize halfway when he was down the hall that he actually had no idea behind which door the bathroom hid. There was one door slightly ajar and Ryan instinctively glanced inside only to find that it was the kitchen. That was when he realized that it had easily been quarter of an hour since Geoff and Caleb had left to get more drinks and yet they were still in the kitchen.

Ryan’s curiosity got the better of him and he risked a glance around the door. The men had their backs to him but they were still close enough for him to hear most of what they were saying.

“I don’t know, sometimes I just feel like I’m a distraction to you.” That was Caleb sounding surprisingly vulnerable.

“Come on buddy, you’re not. And hey, even if you were you’d be the hottest damn distraction I’ve ever seen.”

Oh. Holy shit.

Ryan froze in the doorway, suddenly aware of his every breath. He didn’t want to make a sound in case they caught him snooping on them and yet his brain was sending alarm bells ringing telling him to get the hell out of there.

“Trust me, you’re just as special to me as Griffon is. You don’t need to worry about that,” Geoff assured the younger male in a soft tone. A second later and they were full on making out, Caleb’s hands wrapping around Geoff’s neck to hold him in close.

Ryan decided he had seen more than enough and crept back out of the doorway. He was more than a little confused. Was Geoff cheating on Griffon with Caleb? Was that why Caleb was always so shifty when people in the chatroom asked him about his love life?

It was too much information for his poor brain to handle after being frazzled by Gavin’s earlier questions so he shuffled back to the dining room and sat down next to Jordan, giving the boy a weak smile as he did so. Jordan shot him a look of concern and leaned in closer. “You feeling alright?” he asked, sending Ryan’s heart for another loop. He really was punching about his weight with a guy like Jordan, wasn’t he?

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he assisted. Despite that, he didn’t say much for the rest of the evening. Even when Caleb and Geoff came back from the kitchen a few minutes later with four bottles of wine between them, Ryan didn’t say anything. He just stared at them with slightly narrowed eyes and refused the wine that was offered to him on the grounds that he wasn’t a big drinker anyway. Jordan frowned at that but Ryan just avoided his eye.

“Guess that means twice as much for me!” Gavin declared happily, drawing the attention away from Ryan without even realizing it. He had a habit of always saying the right thing at the perfect time without meaning to and Ryan thought it was rather spectacular really.

The casual conversation continued for a good while after that but every now and then Ryan found his gaze drifting over towards Geoff and Caleb. How had he missed the looks between them and the gentle touches before this? Now that he had seen them once it seemed like the most obvious thing in the world. How was nobody else noticing it?

“So how’s life with Dan in the apartment, huh?” Geoff asked, turning to Gavin. Much to his own shame Ryan found himself paying more attention than he had to the previous conversation. He hated how much he was instinctively interested in Gavin’s relationship when he had his own perfectly fine boyfriend sitting next to him. No, Jordan was better than fine. It was Ryan who was just _okay_ and he was sure Jordan would realize that sooner or later.

Gavin seemed momentarily flustered by the question. “Uh yeah, it was alright,” he answered without looking anybody in the eyes.

“Was?” Griffon questioned, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Well he’s gone back to England now.” The sentence came out as more of a murmur as if Gavin really wasn’t looking forward to breaking the news. A few seconds later and Ryan understood why.

“He _what?!_ ” Geoff all but shrieked, his voice practically raising a whole octave on the second word. Griffon rested an arm on her husband’s arm as if to calm him. It didn’t seem to do much good but Ryan’s terrible brain wondered if he’d be any calmer if it had been Caleb to touch him like that.

“I think what Geoff is trying to say is that we had no idea he was leaving so soon,” Griffon translated politely although Ryan could hear the hurt behind her words. “We would have done something to see him off.”

“Well, uh, he’ll probably be back soon,” countered Gavin, deliberately not meeting her eye.

There was a slight pause so of course Ryan put his foot in it by talking. What else would he be doing? “Is Dan your boyfriend?” he blurted out suddenly, drawing everybody’s attention back to him. For a moment he feared he had made a terrible mistake before Gavin broke into giggles. If anything he had broken the strange tension that had risen around the table since Geoff had first mentioned Dan.

“Oh God no! He’d drive me loopy,” Gavin said between bouts of laughter. Even Geoff smiled although he still looked a little uneasy.

“Ah. Gotcha.” Ryan’s brain was going a hundred miles an hour though. All this time he thought Gavin had been seeing the guy he’d seen Gavin with at his apartment on the day of his first date with Jordan and yet here he was being proven wrong. Gavin was single and it was like a part of Ryan’s brain was lighting up with excitement. Suddenly the boy in 4B didn’t seem so out of reach anymore.

Except there was one thing that quickly put a halt to Ryan’s excitement and that was the boy sat to his left who suddenly moved his hand to take hold of one of Ryan’s. The older male glanced up to see Jordan staring at him intently, an unreadable expression on his face.

Neither of them said anything for the next few minutes. Griffon and Caleb made easy banter and Ryan found that frustrated him more than he realized. He barely knew Griffon and yet he wanted to jump to her defence. The thought of causing a scene terrified him though so he stayed silent, looking anywhere but at Gavin. He could feel Jordan’s eyes gazing at him and the thought of even looking in Gavin’s direction while his boyfriend was right there made him feel uneasy.

Why couldn’t Dan have been Gavin’s boyfriend after all? At least that way Ryan wouldn’t have to deal with the scary knowledge that at least a part of him wanted to cut his losses with Jordan and ask Gavin on a date. That terrified him because he’d never thought he was that kind of person who could so easily discard people and replace them. Besides, it wasn’t like he even knew Gavin.

Then again, did he really know Jordan at all? They were still practically strangers. Suddenly it occurred to Ryan just how fast everything had been moving. Barely a month ago Lindsay hadn’t even met MJ in person yet and now he was suddenly leaving. Ryan certainly hadn’t known the real identity of AhoyWeirdness then and now he was sat next to him as his _boyfriend_ and oh god they really were moving too fast—

“I think we’re gonna take off.” It was Jordan speaking and it snapped Ryan out of his thoughts. He turned to look at Jordan but the other male wasn’t looking his way. In fact he seemed rather determined not to look at him. “I’m feeling pretty tired. Probably best for an early night,” he explained, smiling feebly at the hosts. Ryan couldn’t help but feel like it was a lie.

For the first time since he had found out that Dan wasn’t Gavin’s boyfriend, Ryan spared a glance over at the Brit and really wished he hadn’t. The disappointed look on his face made his heart lurch and he had to physically remind himself that he was here for Jordan, not Gavin.

As Griffon fussed over Jordan and he said his goodbyes to Gavin and Caleb, Ryan found himself stood with Geoff. He felt just as uneasy around the other man as he had at first thanks to the secret he’d accidentally walked in on so when the man stepped closer and leaned in to whisper into his ear he was understandably concerned.

“You be good to him or you’ll have me to answer to, okay?” Geoff muttered, not sounding nearly as threatening as Ryan had been expecting. However considering his earlier thoughts about Gavin… well, Ryan sure as fuck felt a lot guiltier than he already did.

After they said their final goodbyes and made it into the elevator, Ryan couldn’t help but feel like he should say something to fill the silence. There shouldn’t be this much silence between boyfriends who were happy together – or at least that was something he’d heard. He was hardly experienced in the boyfriend department.

“I had a good time,” he said finally, smiling weakly over at Jordan. His boyfriend just hummed in agreement.

They reached the fourth floor seconds later and Ryan instinctively stepped out. He only realized a moment later that Jordan wasn’t following him. The younger male was holding the elevator doors open, looking as if he wanted to say something but nothing came out. There was so much Ryan wanted to say in that moment – he wanted to apologize for not being more involved with the talk over dinner and he wanted to ask if Jordan knew about Geoff and Caleb and even worse he wanted to know if Gavin would be hanging out with them any time soon but he knew he couldn’t say any of that. Instead they stared at each other in silence for a few seconds more.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jordan asked finally, a slight hint of worry to his voice.

“Sure.” Ryan hated how the word almost got caught in his throat. This was supposed to be simple, dammit!

Jordan gave him the smallest of smiles before he pulled back and let the elevator doors roll shut. The moment he was out of sight Ryan let out a breath he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding.

“Nice date?” Lindsay asked from her doorway, having clearly been spying on them since the elevator door opened. She hadn’t left her apartment much since she’d told him the news that Michael was planning on leaving Austin and honestly he couldn’t blame her. The outside world was full of complications and choices and it _sucked_. His whole day had proven that.

Ryan didn’t answer her question, he just pushed past into her apartment. It wasn’t as if she complained considering she did the same to him on a fairly regular basis.

A few hours of letting her kick his ass at Street Fighter was enough to numb his brain to the point where he could no longer think about Geoff and Caleb or Jordan or Gavin because he was distracted by the rage he felt every time Lindsay pulled a special combo on his ass.

Eventually he passed out on the sofa, his best friend cuddled up next to him and had the best night of dreamless sleep he’d ever had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait between chapters! Hopefully the next one will be out sooner! Prepare for even more angst!


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael's leaving party doesn't go as planned.

**JoshTheTokenGuy:**  yo has anybody else seen the poster down in the lobby?

 **MoreKeys:**  for MJ’s leaving party?

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  WAIT WHAT

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  that would be it

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  MJ’s moving out?!?!?!?

 **ZazzyZech** : Are we all going?

 **MoreKeys:**  well duh it’s a party

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  sure why not

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  ?!?!?!?!!?

 **ZazzyZech:**  Should we buy him a leaving present or something?

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  do any of us even know him?

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  are we even invited?

 **MoreKeys:**  barb’s running it

 **MoreKeys:**  of course we are

_[HEIROFISILDUR is now online]_

**HeirOfIsildur:**  hi guys!

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  yo

 **ZazzyZech:**  Hi Chris!

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  ARE WE IGNORING THE FACT MJ IS MOVING OUT

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  DID EVERYBODY KNOW BUT ME???

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  pretty much yea

 **HeirOfIsildur:** miles don’t you live next door to him?

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  EXACTLY

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  HOW THE FUCK DID I NOT KNOW?!?

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  bad neighbor

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  YOU TAKE THAT BACK

 **ZazzyZech:**  So do we have a consensus on the leaving present?

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  if we have to

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  I’ll pitch in, sure! :)

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  Fuck your group present, I’m getting him something myself!

 **ZazzyZech:**  Um rude

 **ZazzyZech:**  Aaron?

 **MoreKeys:**  yes arryn?

 **ZazzyZech:**  Are you pitching in?

 **MoreKeys:**  sure

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  oh hi aaron

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  I didn’t know you were online!

 _[MOREKEYS is now offline_ ]

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  …

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  have you two fallen out again?

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  apparently?

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  probably explains why I keep running into him on my floor at 2am

 **ZazzyZech:**  Why are you up at 2am?

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  Kerry

 **ZazzyZech:**  Do we even want to know?

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  we don’t

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  why would Aaron be on the second floor?

 **ZazzyZech:**  I think he and Meg have been hanging out a lot lately…

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  oh

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  that’s cool

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  aw buddy u got dumped ;)

 **HeirOfIsildur:**  shut up

_[REDRIDINGHOOD is now online]_

**RedRidingHood:**  Hiiiiiii guys!

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  holy shit u did the barb thing

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  are you magic?

 **RedRidingHood:**  Ummmmmm… no?

_[HEIROFISILDUR is now offline]_

**JoshTheTokenGuy:**  #awkward

 **RedRidingHood:**  What?

 **ZazzyZech:**  Hey Meg, you want in on our leaving present for Michael?

 **RedRidingHood:**  Sure!

 **RedRidingHood:**  Our floor is gonna be so quiet without him…

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  YOU KNEW TOO?!

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  WTF

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  DOES HE HATE ME OR SOMETHING

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  …

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  THANKS A LOT JOSH

_[TUGGLIFE is now online]_

**RedRidingHood:**  Lindsay!

 **ZazzyZech:**  Hey girly!

 **TuggLife:**  hi guys :)

 **RedRidingHood:**  I haven’t seen you online in forever!

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  YOU’RE ALIVE

 **RedRidingHood:**  Or in person actually…

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  sorry i have no idea who you are

 **TuggLife:**  well i’m guessing you’re josh…

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  and you’re the famous Lindsay

 **TuggLife:**  famous??

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  well they seem to know who you are

 **RedRidingHood:**  Josh how do you not know Lindsay?!

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  everybody knows everybody here!

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  its like a rule or something

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  ah well whatever

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  I’m sure you can introduce me at michael’s leaving party

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  bro… no

 **ZazzyZech:**  Another time!

 **TuggLife:**  no it’s fine

 **RedRidingHood:**  Wait are you going to the party?

 **TuggLife:**  yup

 **RedRidingHood:**  Are you sure?

 **TuggLife:**  why wouldn’t i?

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  didn’t you two have like a horrible break up?

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  one with lots of screaming and crying

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  and that’s why nobody apart from ryan’s seen you in like a week?

 **ZazzyZech:**  Miles…

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  yeah?

 **ZazzyZech:**  Please stop.

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  oooh bro ur in for it now

 **TuggLife:**  yeah we broke up

 **TuggLife:**  but I need an excuse to get drunk so what the hell

 **RedRidingHood:**  Hell yeah! Show him what he’s missing out on!

 **TuggLife:**  exactly!

 **ZazzyZech:**  Girls round mine to get ready?

 **RedRidingHood:**  100% yes

 **TuggLife:**  i’m up for it

 **ZazzyZech:**  Meg you wanna invite Ashley?

 **RedRidingHood:**  Um okay

 **RedRidingHood:**  Need to check she’s not being gross with her boyfriend first

 **TuggLife:**  eurgh

 **ZazzyZech:**  Are they really bad?

 **TuggLife:**  i dunno

 **TuggLife:**  just… couples

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:**  i think we’re gonna get along great

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  hey guys can i come?!

 **ZazzyZech:**  …no Miles

 **LightOfTheMoon:**  awwww :(

 

* * *

 

It had been a few days since dinner at the Ramseys and Ryan wasn’t exactly feeling any better about it. He had only spoken to Jordan a couple of times since then and it had only been over text. He was always either out in the city with Gavin or doing some sort of animation work which he didn’t want interrupted. In fact Ryan was beginning to think that Jordan was avoiding him.

He didn’t dare voice his concerns or frustrations to anyone. The only person he trusted enough to tell was Lindsay and she had enough on her plate. Michael was moving back to New Jersey at the end of the week and she still hadn’t spoken to him since their argument on the night of Jeremy’s surprise party. He didn’t want to bother her with any more drama which was why he hadn’t told her about Geoff and Caleb either.

It was eating up at his brain, being unable to tell anyone, but he knew there was no way he could tell Jordan. Either he’d end up accused of lying or he’d tear apart a whole family unit and he didn’t want to be responsible for that.

While he had originally planned on missing Michael's farewell party to stand in solidarity with Lindsay, he had quickly changed his mind when she'd decided to go after all. He wasn’t sure that it was the best idea she’d ever had but the death glare he’d received when he’d voiced those concerns had shut him up fairly quickly. The original plan had been to pre-drink at her apartment and Jordan would join them when he was ready. Then they'd head down to the party together but that plan had quickly changed when Meg and Arryn had invited her over to get ready with the rest of the girls. Clearly Ryan wasn’t invited so he instead offered for Jordan to come to his instead. He presumed that was the good boyfriend thing to do.

Then, just a couple of hours before the party was due to start, Jordan text him to say that he’d have to meet him there because he was with Jeremy. Ryan knew better than to pry, especially considering how concerned Jordan had been about Jeremy and Kdin. Instead he just text back a simple ‘ok’ and pretended like he wasn’t as upset at coming second to Jeremy as he was.

So, with nothing to do until the party, he had ended up on the chatroom. He wasn’t the only one either – there were a whole bunch of people gathered there who were getting started on the alcohol alone. Miles had the great idea of them all drinking together in person rather than alone on the chatroom and Ryan found himself surprisingly eager to agree. He wasn’t quite sure why – it wasn’t as if past parties had ever been overly kind to him in the social sense but anything would beat sitting around on his own with his thoughts. He was concerned for Lindsay and worried about Jordan and it was getting too much to deal with on his own so he accepted Miles’ invitation over to his apartment.

By the time he arrived, several others had beaten him there. Miles welcomed in with a smile even wider than normal and a distinct lack of balance that suggested he had been drinking since at least midday. Ryan decided it wasn’t really his place to judge considering he’d started drinking shortly afterwards. He wasn’t much of a big alcohol drinker but with all his recent confusing and overwhelming thoughts he had come to realize that getting drunk was a good way to drown them out.

Miles introduced him to the rest of his guests with a distinct slur to voice. The small hobbit-looking guy with sandy hair was called Kerry. Then there was a wiry guy with an awkward smile who introduced himself as Chris. The third and final friend was Patrick, one of the happiest people Ryan had ever met in his life. Patrick’s smiles weren’t anything like Miles’ half-crazed ones were, every single one seemed genuine and he had a talent for always seeming interested in the conversation no matter what.

The conversation quickly turned to Patrick’s flirtation with a friend of Blaine’s. Ryan found himself happy and eager to listen to somebody else’s drama for once. It was the perfect distraction from his own, after all. Besides, the thing going on between Patrick and Kyle hardly seemed like drama. Sure, Kyle was supposedly straight but he’d admitted to Patrick that he thought he was cute and maybe he wasn’t  _quite_  as straight as he’d originally thought. Ryan’s smile was beginning to hurt his cheeks he thought the whole damn thing was so adorable.

“So is he gonna be there tonight?!” Chris asked eagerly before adding in a quieter voice: “I mean, if Aaron was replying to my texts I’d be able to tell you.”

“Yeah, what’s up with that?” Miles asked, cutting the conversation to focus on Chris. “He was normal in the chat earlier and then you appeared and BOOM he gets all weird.”

“I dunno, he’s been like that for about a week now.”

“Since Jeremy’s party?”

“Why are we even calling it Jeremy’s party when he wasn’t even there?” Kerry interjected.

“It was  _his_  birthday, moron,” Miles fired back without missing a beat. He focused back on Chris before asking, “So like, did you break his heart or something?!”

“What? No! I’m not gay and he knows that.”

There was a long pause in the room. Ryan glanced around at all their faces – Chris’ confusion, Kerry and Miles’ awkwardness and Patrick’s sympathy.

“I think Blaine invited Kyle, yeah,” Patrick said after a long pause. Luckily everybody went along with the change of conversation, Miles and Kerry asking questions as if it would help pretend that awkward situation hadn’t just happened. Chris still looked confused every time Ryan glanced over at him but as the conversation moved further away from Aaron he seemed to relax more. Ryan didn’t even want to know what sort of mess was going on there, he had enough on his plate already.

“So do you think he’s like  _boyfriend material?_ ” Kerry whispered as if it was some big secret. Patrick just giggled.

“I don’t know. Maybe? I need to let him work out what he wants first.”

“But you know what you want, right?” Miles asked.

“Dem abs,” Patrick responded in all seriousness. “And dat ass. Dat everything really.”

Miles howled in approval.

 

* * *

 

The boys moved to the apartment next door when the music start to get louder and they heard the unmistakable sound of Barbara yelling over the noise as she directed people to the alcohol. No matter who was throwing the party Barbara seemed to take charge and nobody ever complained. She definitely knew how to throw good parties even if half of the ones Ryan had gone to ended up not going so well. Then again he was anxious enough to think that maybe it was because  _he_  had been there. He had a habit of blaming himself for things that clearly weren’t his fault and he couldn’t help it.

Chris disappeared almost immediately to speak to Barbara about Aaron and they all let him go, not feeling up to talking him down. Patrick watched him go with an almost guilty expression before he sighed and started glancing around.

“Is he here yet?” Kerry asked excitedly, peering over Patrick’s shoulder.

“Ooh, can we be your wingmen?!” Miles suggested. Patrick looked at him for a long second before shaking his head.

“I need no wingmen,” he insisted. “And no, he’s not. Now, let’s go get some more drinks!” Ryan was highly doubtful that Miles and Kerry needed any more drinks in their system but he let them go without argument, frankly rather thankful to have some peace in their absence. They were all nice guys but they talked a hell of a lot more than the people he was used to.

He wasn’t alone for too long. Even as he made himself comfortable with a beer and a place on an armchair, Michael appeared beside him looking unexpectedly nervous. “Hi Ryan,” he mumbled, not quite meeting his eye. A protective, fiery streak suddenly awoke within Ryan and he felt a strange desire to hit the other man. The more practical part of his brain told him how much of a bad idea that would be so he simply gave the other a curt nod.

“Michael.”

“Is—is Lindsay coming?”

“I believe so.”

There was a slight pause. Ryan watched the younger male closely, feeling his protective anger burning just under the surface. He wasn’t quite sure when he’d grown to care for Lindsay so much – probably between their third and fourth all-nighter – but he knew he didn’t want to see her get hurt by a jackass like Michael and yet that was unavoidable now.

“Good. That’s… that’s good.” Michael made a motion as if he was about to leave and before Ryan knew what he was doing, he reached out to grab the other man by the arm.

“Don’t hurt her more than you already have,” he warned, surprising both Michael and himself by the ferocity of his words. Michael looked down at the floor for a moment before pulling out of his grip and walking away.

 

* * *

 

Meg was pretty sure that if she ever tried to be an actress she’d get fired on the spot. She was fucking terrible at hiding her emotions and she knew it. Hell, everybody knew it apart from Ashley. She supposed that was a good thing though. Her crush of the past year was doomed to stay unmentioned while Ashley was making cute with Burnie and perhaps even longer. Meg knew it was petty but she couldn’t help but resent Burnie for that. She knew that Ashley was straight and she’d never like her back but Meg had allowed herself to hope and with him in the picture it was never going to happen.

Basically the whole situation was a shit-show and Ashley was blissfully oblivious. Arryn and Lindsay clearly weren’t as blindsided though judging by the looks they kept giving her while Ashley was talking about this super fucking romantic date Burnie had taken her on last week. Ugh, it made Meg sick. The guy sounded like a total toolbag. Did he even know what Ashley liked? Probably not as much as Meg did.

Instead of being outwardly bitchy like she was so desperate to be, Meg had turned to drinking to silence herself. Arryn was still giving her worried glances every now and then but Lindsay had joined her in the ‘drink-your-feelings-away’ camp so she felt as if they were bonded by it.

They left Arryn’s apartment on the fourth floor after a few more cocktails and could already hear the music from two floors below as they stepped into the elevator. They weren’t the only ones there – Meg recognized Jon from a few apartments down from Lindsay and Caleb from the second floor. Why the hell was he coming down from the upper floors to go back to his own floor where the party was? Choosing not to give a damn, Meg returned to taking sips from her sippy cup of Purple Rain. What? She was totally a classy bird.

The party was only just getting started when they arrived but Meg didn’t care. She took the first opportunity she could to get away from the girls and made a beeline straight for Barbara.

Unfortunately Chris stepped right in front of her before she could reach her destination. “Meg, hey!” His hands were fidgeting as if he couldn’t decide what he wanted to do with them and the smile he gave her was just a little too forced.

“Have we ever even spoken before?” she blurted out, the alcohol making her a lot blunter than she had intended to be.

“Uh, no.”

 “Right… Hi?” If she hadn’t had a couple of cocktails and an overwhelming bad mood from hearing Ashley talk about her super-duper awesome boyfriend then she would have been showering him with hugs like she did with every new friend she made. Right now though she wasn’t exactly in the mood.

“Have you seen Aaron lately? Arryn said you guys have been hanging around a lot.”

 _Oh. Shit._  Meg just smiled while making a mental note to throttle Arryn later. “Um, not lately?” she lied, plastering a smile on her face and hoping it sold him.

“Well when was the last time?” He seemed strangely insistent.

“Uh, yesterday?” Not a lie this time although she wasn’t exactly planning to mention that Aaron had been going down on her at the time. It seemed like it might be an inappropriate thing to tell his roommate.

“Hmm. Okay. Thanks.” And with that, he disappeared. Meg stopped caring the moment his back was turned.

 

* * *

 

Jordan arrived an hour late.

Ryan had felt strangely concerned as he waited for his boyfriend to show up. He had seen Lindsay but she was having a good time with Arryn and he didn’t want to interrupt. He made sure to keep a close eye on her though in case Michael tried to pull her aside. Luckily he’d kept his distance from her so far.

Caleb had arrived shortly after Lindsay and the girls had. Once again Ryan felt an anger burn up inside of him that he had to question. It wasn’t as if he knew Griffon all that well so why was he getting so angry in her defensive? Every time he pictured Caleb and Geoff going behind Griffon’s back though he felt the fire burning inside of him. She deserved better than that, especially from somebody she clearly looked at like a son.

Speaking of Griffon’s adopted sons, Gavin walked in barely five minutes after Caleb. He had bought several six-packs of beer that were weighing his skinny arms down. Ryan made a motion to get up from his armchair and help the Brit but Michael beat him there. They exchanged some loud words of excitement before dropping the beer onto a table and embracing. Ryan forced himself to look away. He knew Michael was straight and he knew Gavin was single so why did it bother him so much? Hell, why was he letting himself get bothered by that when he already had a boyfriend of his own?

It was a question he had been asking himself too much lately. It scared him that he already knew the answer.

After doing the rounds, Gavin finally made his way over to him. Ryan wanted to believe that he hadn’t been purposely watching the Brit move around the party but as much as he could lie to Gavin about it, he couldn’t lie to himself. He knew that he had been watching and that it was creepy and yet he hadn’t stopped himself.

“Hey Ryan! What’re you doing here alone? Where’s Jordan?” Gavin all but draped himself over the arm of the chair. Ryan had to force himself not to get distracted and look Gavin in the eyes.

“Off with Jeremy somewhere.” Gavin’s smile faltered for a moment.

“Oh. Well, I guess that’s good. Has anybody spoken to Kdin?”

“I wouldn’t know. Jordan’s not told me.” Ryan only realized how offended he sounded after the words had left his mouth. His own hypocrisy made him want to scream. How could he be mad at Jordan for not speaking to him when there was still so much he hadn’t told him?

“Ah.” Gavin trailed off. He glanced back around the party – probably to look for a quick escape route, Ryan thought. He mentally kicked himself for making things awkward and scolded himself for the burning need he felt to make Gavin stay.

“So are you and Michael close?”

“Yeah, he’s my boi!” Gavin replied, all of the awkwardness of a few moments ago completely forgotten. Instead he dived into a long story about how he’d first met Michael and the rocky start to their friendship. Just seeing Gavin so animated and excited by the story he was telling made Ryan more interested in him. _I’m definitely going to Hell_. That wasn’t exactly up for question now though, was it?

The story was brought to an abrupt end by Caleb’s sudden appearance. Ryan sat up straighter, eyes narrowing in suspicion. “Hi guys, what are you talking about?” the boy asked cheerily. Apparently he hadn’t picked up on Ryan’s silent distrust. He supposed that was for the best because Ryan really hated the idea of making a scene but he couldn’t shake his sudden dislike of the boy. He wondered what Gavin would think if he knew what Caleb was doing behind his back. No. It wasn’t his place to tell. It wasn’t his issue.

Gavin and Caleb talked for a good few minutes before either one of them realized that Ryan hadn’t contributed anything to the conversation. “You alright, Ryan?” Caleb asked, all smiles and happiness as if he was totally guilt free.

“Peachy.”

Luckily the day was saved by Jordan arriving in that moment. Ryan was on his feet in an instant, making a few hand motions towards his boyfriend before escaping. It wasn’t a moment too soon either because he felt like he was about to burst.

“Hi!” he greeted his boyfriend eagerly, moving in for a kiss without thinking. As their lips pressed together they both froze. A moment later Ryan stepped back, eyes wide in surprise at his own actions. Jordan’s expression was unreadable beyond the obvious shock.

“That’s a new one,” he said finally, reassuring Ryan with his usual charming smile. “How’s the party?”

“Alright, I guess. How’s Jeremy?”

“Surprisingly okay? He and Kdin are officially on a break.” Ryan wasn’t sure that was something to feel okay about but it wasn’t his place to judge. It didn’t help that he had no idea how to react to the news though.

“Uh… good for them?”

“It’s what they need right now.” Jordan seemed mighty sure of that at least. Ryan didn’t argue. They were nothing more than strangers to him anyway.

“Gavin’s here,” he said after a pause.

“Oh. That’s nice.” There was something strange about the way Jordan spoke that made Ryan pause. Had Jordan and Gavin fallen out over the past few days or something and nobody had told him about it? Ryan felt like that was something he should have been told. Wasn’t it a boyfriend’s job to listen to all of their partner’s problems or something?

“Caleb too,” he offered, testing the water.

“Cool.”

The silence that followed was almost deafening.

“I think I’m going to get a drink,” Jordan decided. Ryan suddenly felt the need for another drink too.

 

* * *

Blaine’s party had arrived at the party already drunk as hell and loud enough to let everybody know. Josh had his arm thrown around Kyle, one of the few people at the party who didn’t live in the building. The party wasn’t only limited to people who were actually friends with Michael or the place would look a lot sparser than it did.

Upon their entrance, Patrick sat up a little straighter from his seat. He made eye contact with Kyle almost immediately and found himself blushing a deep shade of scarlet. He was usually confident and carefree but Kyle changed that. He made Patrick feel strange – in the good way of course. Miles and Kerry had noticed too judging from the way they kept nudging him towards the new arrivals. Patrick wanted to hide with shame.

His worry was for nothing though because Kyle abandoned his friends and made his way over in record time. Somehow along the way he’d managed to find two drinks because he had one on offer the moment he stopped in front of Patrick.

“A knight in shining armour who delivers beer? I’m so about this,” Patrick exclaimed, letting Kyle lead him towards a darker corner of the apartment.

It took a few moments for Miles and Kerry to interpret what they’d just heard. “Wait, did he just suggest he needed saving from us?” Kerry asked. Miles was far too drunk to answer. He settled for throwing up on Kerry’s feet.

While Blaine and Josh encouraged Michael to drink with them and Kyle led Patrick into what was surely an important whispered conversation, Aaron was left by the door on his lonesome. He was by far the drunkest of all of them but he had rejected their every suggestion that he head home already. Heading back to his apartment meant that at some point _Chris_ would be there and no, he so couldn’t deal with that tonight.

“Aw fuck, speak of the devil.” There Chris was, right in front of him.

“Are you comparing me to Satan?” Chris asked, quirking an eyebrow at him.

“Maybe.”

“Wow. Rude much.”

“Uh oh, did I hurt your feelings?” It was the alcohol talking. Aaron knew he needed to stop, that he needed to leave before he made things any worse but he couldn’t bring himself to move. Chris looked like he had been slapped in the face and honestly he was glad.

“There’s no need to be a bitch.” Aaron just snorted. “Maybe you should go to bed.”

“You don’t get to tell me what to do! You’re not my boyfriend!”

Aaron hadn’t meant to scream that last sentence. He hadn’t even noticed that he had but the people around him had definitely heard. If he had been sober then maybe he would have been insecure about the amount of people watching him make a scene but he really, really wasn’t.

“I… I know I’m not,” Chris said finally, staring at him in utter confusion.

“Stop bossing me around then!”

“I’m not bossing you around.”

“Yes you are! You just told me to go home!”

“Come on Aaron, don’t be childish…”

“Childish? _I’m_ the childish one? You have fucking Lord of the Rings action figures in your room! You’ve got a freakin’ Harry Potter wand! You’re a fucking childish nerd and I hate the fact that it doesn’t bother me! I hate the fact that I like it!”

For Chris it was as if the whole party had gone silent. He couldn’t hear the music anymore nor could he hear the people whispering around him.  “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying…” Aaron broke off for a moment there. He wiped the tears out of his eyes and hated himself for letting them be there in the first place. “I’m saying I can’t live with you anymore.”

“What?”

“You need to move out.”

 

* * *

 

Ashley found Meg out in the hallway while everybody was busy watching Aaron have a total meltdown. She felt bad for him and wanted to tell people to mind their own business but she also knew that it wasn’t her place to intrude. It was definitely her place to find out what was going on with her best friend though. She wasn’t blind, she could tell that something was bothering Meg and she didn’t like the idea of her friend keeping it bottled up. Ashley was a big believer in letting things out instead of keeping them cooped up and letting them grow into even bigger issues.

Meg was tossing her empty sippy cup from hand to hand while singing some J-Pop song she only knew half the words to. She didn’t seem to notice Ashley until the blonde was sat next to her.

“Oh. Hi Ash.” She sounded almost deflated in the way she spoke. Yeah, there was definitely something wrong.

“Hey baby, what’s up?” Ashley asked, reaching an arm around Meg’s shoulders without thinking. This was just the way she was around her girlfriends. Meg didn’t seem to react so kindly to it though. She pulled out of Ashley’s cuddle so sharply that her touch might as well have been poisonous.

“Don’t,” Meg warned her, shuffling away a few spaces. As if Ashley hadn’t been concerned before, she was now on high alert. What the hell was going on with people tonight?

Knowing she had to tread carefully, Ashley stayed put in her place against the wall but didn’t let Meg out of her sights. The purple-haired girl seemed reluctant to look in her direction and that told Ashley enough about what was going on. “What did I do wrong?” she asked softly, already feeling disappointed in herself. She hated the thought of upsetting anyone, especially her best friend.

“You… never mind.”

“No, there’s something. Come on Meg, you know you can tell me.”

“I can’t though!” Meg snapped, meeting Ashley’s eye for the first time since they had left Arryn’s apartment. It wasn’t a happy expression that looked back at her.

“Meg, we’re best friends. You can tell me anything,” she pushed on despite knowing she was still stepping on thin ice.

“Ash, please leave me alone.”

“I don’t want to. Not while you’re hurting like this.”

“ _Please_ , just go!”

Ashley was suddenly aware of the tears in her eyes and hurried to brush them away. Being pushed away by anyone never felt good but Meg was her best friend. Surely she should know what she had done wrong?

“Meg, please just—”

“I’m in love with you! I love you, okay?”

Silence. Ashley had no idea what to say.

“I was never going to tell you because you’ve got Burnie and you’re so fucking in love it makes me want to throw up. I’ve loved you for so long now and it’s been fucking killing me and you had no idea! It was always Burnie this and Burnie that! You didn’t even stop for a second to notice me.” Meg was past the point of caring now. She knew that she had gone too far but there was no going back. The alcohol was definitely in the driver’s seat but it felt good to finally have it out there. “So no, I can’t tell you everything.”

“I had no idea,” Ashley said after a long pause. Her mind was racing as she tried to comprehend what she had just been told. Meg was in love with her? It had to be a joke, right? She knew that Meg was into guys and girls and she had been supportive of that but she’d never considered that Meg would be into _her_. They were friends, she had always just presumed Meg wouldn’t ever see her like that.

“Exactly. I’m not Burnie so why would you ever notice me?”

“Meg, that’s not _fair_ \--”

“I don’t give a shit!” Meg scrambled up to her feet, more than a little unsteady thanks to all the alcohol she’d consumed. “I don’t care about Burnie and god, I _wish_ I didn’t care about you.”

“Meg--”

The time for talking was over though. Before Ashley could even get up Meg had run down the corridor and was pressing the button to call the elevator so rapidly that she was probably going to end up breaking either her finger or the button.

When the doors finally rolled open and Meg stepped inside, Ashley instinctively took a step forward to follow her.

“Don’t,” Meg warned.

Ashley reluctantly let her go.

 

* * *

“Something’s going on with you,” Jordan said after giving Ryan a long hard look. Ryan had felt the boy’s eyes on him but he’d looked away and said nothing about it. He felt awkward enough as it was, he didn’t want to make the situation worse. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” Ryan replied, a little too quickly to be believed. Jordan gave him a look that very clearly said he knew the other was lying. “Seriously, don’t worry about it.”

“I am worried,” Jordan pressed on. Ryan felt his grip on the beer bottle tighten somewhat. “What happened at Griffon’s?”

Oh God. Ryan had faith in his acting skills but he didn’t feel comfortable lying to the one person he was supposed to be honest with. It didn’t feel good. “I don’t know what you mean,” he protested meekly.

“Yes you do. Stop avoiding my question.” The sharp tone of Jordan’s words was unexpected but Ryan knew he deserved it. He knew he had to come clean – but about what?

“I… I saw Caleb and Geoff kissing. Geoff’s cheating on Griffon,” he said finally, unable to look Jordan in the eye as he admit it. How was he supposed to live with himself now? He had chosen to save his own hide by outing Caleb and Geoff rather than outing his own improper thoughts about Jordan’s friend. What sort of man did that make him?

A coward, that’s what.

“Oh. Are you sure?”

“I wouldn’t make this stuff up.”

There was a pause before Jordan spoke. “Right.”

The pause made his temper flare up again. “I’m not lying!” he snapped in his own defence, feeling offended that Jordan would even imply that.

“I’m not saying you are.”

“But you don’t believe me?”

“I do! You’ve just… you’ve got it wrong. Geoff’s not cheating on Griffon.”

“I saw them kissing! He’s cheating on her!” Ryan’s voice was raised slightly and they were definitely at risk of being overheard. Luckily Gavin and Caleb had moved on to another area of the party. They were the last people Ryan wanted to be overhearing them in that moment.

“Will you chill out for a second?!” Jordan fired back angrily, pulling away from his boyfriend. They had been sat back in the armchair, Jordan resting comfortably on Ryan’s lap until now. “Geoff would never cheat on Griffon.”

“Right, so you _do_ think I’m lying.”

“Oh my God, will you just listen to me? Geoff’s not cheating on Griffon with Caleb because it’s not an affair. He’s part of their relationship!”

If Ryan was confused before then they needed to invent a new word for how he felt now. “What?”

“It’s a polyamorous relationship. The three of them love each other so they’re together. Caleb’s just a bit shy so they don’t advertise it. He didn’t want you to know.” Jordan was on the defensive now and Ryan couldn’t help but feel annoyed by that.

“So you were just not gonna tell me?”

“It wasn’t my place to tell!”

“What if I had told people about it? I could have made a fool of myself all because you wouldn’t tell me!”

“Ryan, I can’t believe I’m saying this but get off your high horse. I like you – I like you _a lot_ even but they’re my family. If they ask me to keep a secret then I will. How was I supposed to know you’d seen them? You were too busy mooning over Gavin all evening anyway.”

“I wasn’t-- wait, what?”

 

* * *

 

Lindsay had seen Michael almost immediately upon entering the apartment and she had made a point of heading the opposite direction. Even though she already had a few drinks she knew she wasn’t nearly ready to deal with the tough conversations she needed to have with him.

He had chosen Jersey over her. There was more to the story than that of course but that was what it essentially boiled down to. He had been given a choice and he had chosen to leave instead of staying with her.

She felt like such a fucking idiot. It wasn’t as if she let herself fall for people often but things with Michael had been different. He encouraged her terrible gaming the same way she encouraged his overreactions to the littlest things. They ate crappy food together and laughed at terrible movies. Things had been good and even though she’d been confused about where they were going she had been confident they would have a future.

Until now, at least. Now Lindsay was certain of the fact Michael Jones was a fucking asshole and she didn’t give a crap about him.

Except that wasn’t quite true. If she didn’t give a crap then she wouldn’t have spent the last week curled up in bed crying her eyes out. She was good at playing the tough girl on the exterior but inside she felt like she was breaking and she was so fucking mad about it. How dare he do this to her after she had let him in?

The party was starting to wind down by the time they finally crossed paths. Aaron and Chris had stormed off separately after a very public row and Meg and Ashley had both disappeared a few hours ago. Lindsay had tired of Miles and Kerry’s heated debate on what was the best Tomb Raider game and decided to grab herself another drink when she walked straight into the very man she had been trying to avoid.

“Aw shit, I’m sorry,” Michael said before even realizing who he’d collided with. “Oh. Hi.”

“Hi.” Lindsay wasn’t sure she could manage to get any more words out.

“Glad you could make it.” He smiled and Lindsay wished it didn’t affect her as much as it did.

“Are you?” she challenged, deciding to stand her ground. Lindsay Tuggey was no pushover and he would learn that.

“Yeah. I wanted to see you before I go,” he mumbled in response.

“So you’re still going, huh?”

“Yup.”

“Thought you might have changed your mind.”

“Nope… still going.” He sounded almost regretful as he added, “It’s a good job opportunity. I’d be an idiot to pass it up.”

“You’re an idiot for leaving,” she countered. “You’re an idiot for giving _me_ up.”

Michael was stunned into silence. Whatever he’d expected from her it definitely hadn’t been defiance. Seeing his shock filled Lindsay with much needed adrenaline.

“I don’t care if it’s the family business or whatever excuse you’re going with – you had something good here. I like you a lot and I don’t think I’ve hid that but no, apparently I’m not good enough for you.”

“That’s not why I’m going--”

“It doesn’t matter why you’re going! You’re leaving and that’s that, you said it yourself. Forgive me if I’m not gonna beg you to stay.” And with that, Lindsay raised her half-empty bottle of beer and emptied it over Michael’s head.

“Also fuck you, Jersey bitch.” Lindsay felt like a queen as she walked out of that place with her head held high. She didn’t look back either. Michael couldn’t expect her to stay if he couldn’t do the same.

 

* * *

 

Had he just heard that right? Had Jordan really accused him of mooning over Gavin? It was the truth and Ryan knew it but he’d had no idea that Jordan knew it too.

“I see the way you look at him!” Jordan started, sounding surprisingly calmer than he had a few moments before. “I could see it the first time we met. You thought AhoyWeirdness was him, didn’t you?”

Ryan just stared, too shocked to say anything. He had a feeling Jordan didn’t need him to say anything at all though. He apparently knew everything anyway. “I… yeah, I thought it was him.”

Even if Jordan had known it all along, he still looked miserable upon hearing the confirmation. “Well crap,” he breathed, turning away from Ryan for a moment. “You know, I kinda hoped it wasn’t true. I guess I really am an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot!” Ryan said quickly, reaching out to grab Jordan’s shoulder but stopping himself from making contact. He knew it wouldn’t help.

“You should have been honest with me from the start,” Jordan sighed, finally looking back at him. He didn’t look mad or upset, he just looked… well, tired. It made Ryan’s heart ache.

“I like you, I do!” Ryan insisted, taking a step closer. To his relief Jordan didn’t immediately recoil. “I just… I didn’t expect you.”

“Did you really expect Gavin to turn up on that date?” There was an almost pleading tone to Jordan’s voice that tugged at all of his heartstrings. Ryan wanted to lie. He really wanted to but he knew it wouldn’t help. He nodded.

“Great. Just… great.” Jordan was laughing now, the sort of hysterical laugh people do when they’re dealing with bad news. Ryan felt guilty for being the cause of it. “I had a crush on you for ages, you know? Just talking to you made my day better. It’s silly, I know.”

“It’s not silly at all.”

“It is though. I put too much thought into it. Into _us_. All those little jokes Barb made about us being a couple – I think I started to believe it, you know? I mean, I knew how much I liked you…”

“Jordan, I like you too--” Ryan started, only to be silenced as Jordan raised a hand. He felt like he was at the younger man’s mercy now.

“That’s it though, Ryan. You like me _too_. You like Gavin as well,” he pointed out. Ryan hung his head. It was true after all. Jordan just sighed and started to pace. The majority of people had left by now and they were both thankful for it. It was hardly the type of conversation to be having in public but it was too late to move now.

“Jeremy said something to me earlier that got me thinking,” Jordan started, turning to face Ryan again, “Life’s too short for maybes. It’s why he and Kdin are taking their break.” Ryan didn’t see what that had to do with him but he knew better than to interject. “He didn’t want to stay if Kdin only _maybe_ wanted to settle down and have a family or if Kdin _maybe_ one day learned that he doesn’t like big parties. There were too many maybes in their relationship and it wasn’t working.”

Ryan stayed silent, listening to Jordan talk intently. He didn’t even want to think about the meaning behind his words but a part of him already knew.

“There are too many maybes here, Ryan. _Maybe_ you’ll get over Gavin. _Maybe_ you’ll like me as much as you like him. _Maybe_ you’ll learn to be honest with me--”

“I can learn!” Ryan interjected in a panic, his gut sinking as he realized what Jordan was saying.

“ _Maybe_ you can,” Jordan corrected him. “But I can’t stick around to find out. I like you, Ryan. I like you a lot but--”

“But nothing! Please Jordan, I’m sorry. I’m a terrible boyfriend, I know but I can do better! Give me a chance and I’ll prove it, okay?”

“I can’t stick around for you to work out who you want, Ryan.” The look Jordan gave him wasn’t angry or even disappointed. It was almost bittersweet. “I deserve somebody who’s certain they want me. You’re not, are you?”

The words were caught in Ryan’s throat. Defeated, he hung his head.

“Thank you,” Jordan sighed.

He leaned in, placed a single kiss on Ryan’s forehead and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FEEL FREE TO HIT ME FOR THIS CHAPTER. I want to hit myself, to be honest.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael's leaving party left some lasting effects. Not everybody is happy about them.
> 
> In fact nobody is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY THIS CHAPTER TOOK SO LONG, LIFE GOT HARD. I promise not to make you wait so long again!

_[LIGHTOFTHEMOON is now online]_

**Punkelman:** Hey Miles!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** who else is online???

 **Punkelman:** Just me

 **Punkelman:** Why?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** u gotta save me

 **Punkelman:** What’s going on?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** chris moved in with me after aaron kicked him out

 **LightOfTheMoon:** and he’s driving me crazy omg

 **LightOfTheMoon:** he keeps making tea wrong

 **LightOfTheMoon:** and he’s made my xbox controller all sticky

 **LightOfTheMoon:** which is NOT OKAY

 **Punkelman:** Aw buddy

 **Punkelman:** That sucks

 **LightOfTheMoon:** YOU DON’T KNOW THE HALF OF IT

 **LightOfTheMoon:** I MAY BE PREMATURELY GOING BALD FROM STRESS

 **Punkelman:** You’d look pretty funny bald

 **LightOfTheMoon:** NOT THE POINT

 **LightOfTheMoon:** can u like get him out of my hair for a bit

 **Punkleman:** Your non-existent hair?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** DAMN IT PUN THIS IS NOT THE TIME

 **Punkelman:** I’m sure I can find a reason to hang out with him

 **Punkelman:** But considering Meg is p much living with Aaron 2 doors down?

 **Punkelman:** might not be such a good idea to bring him up here

 **LightOfTheMoon:** wait are meg and aaron still doing it?

 **Punkelman:** Going by the sounds from next door… yes

 **Punkelman:** I think it’s pretty much to spite Chris and Ashley now though

 **LightOfTheMoon:** i…

 **LightOfTheMoon:** there’s too much fucking drama for me

 **Punkelman:** tell me about it

 

* * *

 

It had been a week since the disastrous events of Michael’s leaving party and things hadn’t really calmed down much in anybody’s life. Only two people seemed to be happy with the outcome of the actual party – Patrick, who had spent another good night with his dreamboat Kyle, and Jordan. He had been as smiley and happy as ever as if he hadn’t just broken up with his first boyfriend in what felt like forever. As if he hadn’t just had his heart broken with the realization that Ryan had been crushing on his best friend and brother substitute all along.

To tell the truth, it sucked. Of course it did. Jordan was just a lot better at hiding his feelings than most and he’d already sort of accepted that his relationship with Ryan was over by the time the party started. He had guessed that Ryan’s interest in Gavin was more than just friendship and he had caught up to his boyfriend’s lies early on in the night. As much as it hurt that he had been let down by somebody he thought he could genuinely be happy with, he felt glad that it was over. He wasn’t dragging out his own misery any longer than he had to.

Besides, like he’d told Ryan, he deserved someone better.

He’d been spending a lot of time with Jeremy in the week since the party. There was a part of him that almost blamed Gavin for what had happened with Ryan and as stupid as it was, Jordan couldn’t look at him the same – at least not for now. So yeah, maybe he’d been avoiding his friend a bit but it wasn’t like he was shutting himself away from the world to do so. Besides, Jeremy needed somebody around too. He and Kdin were still on their break and they needed all the distractions from each other they could get.

For the most part he and Jeremy just sat in relative silence. Jeremy was obsessing over the new Halo game and Jordan lost himself in drawing shitty little cartoons that he personally didn’t think were any good but people seemed to like. Griffon and Geoff were always supportive of them – they even had one framed and on their apartment wall – but then that was just the Ramseys in a nutshell. They were always supportive no matter what. It was why he loved them unconditionally because he always knew that if he needed to turn to somebody for advice or comfort or _anything_ they would be there for him.

Except he couldn’t go to them about his Ryan issue. Sure, he’d told them because he didn’t like the thought of keeping them out of the loop at all but he wasn’t exactly going to cry on their shoulders about it either. Ending the relationship had been his decision and he didn’t feel too bad about it either. It wasn’t what he needed right now and it wasn’t what Ryan wanted. Things would work out in the long run but for now, while he was still hurting, Jordan thought it was probably best that he recuperate in peace. That was what he got from Jeremy that he wasn’t sure he’d get anywhere else. Gavin would ask too many questions, Caleb would be too sympathetic, and Barbara would try and make jokes out of it. With all the shit he had gone through with Kdin, Jeremy just seemed to understand. It was easy with him.

“You wanna order in?” Jeremy called out from where he was camped out on the sofa. Jordan was laid out on top of the dinner table, sketchbook laid out in front of him. He’d been doodling mindlessly for about an hour now and had ended up with Barbara in the River Nile in front of a bunch of pyramids. Did it make sense? Hell no. Was Barbara going to love it? Probably.

“Sure. Pizza?”

“Always.” The silence that followed felt unnatural enough that Jordan predicted what his friend was about to say before the words even left his mouth. “How would you feel about Gav and Caleb coming over?”

Immediately Jordan felt himself freeze up, as if seeing Gavin would send him into some mad panic and he’d suddenly develop a fiery jealous streak. As ridiculous as that sounded, it honestly worried Jordan. He didn’t like the idea of being upset at one of his closest friends but it still gave him reason to hesitate.

“We don’t have to,” Jeremy assured him, pausing his game and glancing over his shoulder. “Just thought it might be nice to have some company for a change.”

“Getting sick of me already?” Jordan asked in response, raising an eyebrow at his friend.

“Hey, I never said that!” Jeremy retorted, a warm grin on his face, “Just don’t want the neighbors talking, y’know?”

“It’s fine, invite them over. I won’t freak out, promise.”

“Wicked. Holding you to that!” Without even bothering to reach for his phone and follow through with inviting their friends over, Jeremy unpaused his game and continued on with the campaign. Jordan let out a sigh before forcing himself to do the hard work. That was sort of a given with Jeremy though – he was full of good intentions but not so great with the follow through. Oh well, at least he was there when Jordan needed him. He supposed he should be thankful for that much.

 

* * *

 

 **ZazzyZech:** Hey Blaine, I want a word!

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:** ohhhhh shit bro you’re in trouble!

 **TheRockJr:** ummmm ok?

 **ZazzyZech:** If your friend Kyle hurts Patrick I will personally castrate you both

 **Risemonger:** I’ll help!

 **Risemonger:** Patrick’s a babe

 **ZazzyZech:** Patrick is like an angel sent down from Heaven

 **ZazzyZech:** and if Kyle turns out to be nothing more than a fuckboy

 **ZazzyZech:** You will regret it.

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:** that full stop tho

 **TheRockJr:** why am i being threatened with castration?!?!

 **TheRockJr:** i cant control him!!!

 **ZazzyZech:** You brought him to Jeremy’s party so you’re responsible for him!

 **TheRockJr:** ok no i am so not responsible for anyone

 **TheRockJr:** i cant even be responsible for myself

 **TheRockJr:** and kyle is good people anyway

 **TheRockJr:** he wont hurt him

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:** I can vouch for that btw Kyle’s pretty chill

 **TheRockJr:** how do we know patrick wont hurt him huh????

 **Risemonger:** You’ve really never spoken to Patrick have you?

 **ZazzyZech:** Oh PLEASE

 **ZazzyZech:** Patrick really couldn’t hurt a fly

 **TheRockJr:** yeh ok i guess ur right

 **ZazzyZech:** Thank you

 **ZazzyZech:** Make sure I don’t have to rip your balls off

 **ZazzyZech:** J

 **JoshTheTokenGuy:** Its fine he doesn’t use them anyway!

 **TheRockJr:** fuck u bro

 **TheRockJr:** just… fuck u

 

* * *

 

There was really nothing between Meg and Aaron. They liked each other, sure, but there was no real connection. The sex was pretty good, they had some interesting conversations about movies but there was nothing really connecting them apart from the fact they had both been in love with their best friends and now they were doing their best to shun that person.

Meg thought she probably had it easier. Ashley was only her neighbour after all, not her roommate, so avoiding her hadn’t been too hard. She’d just started to spend more time on the third floor in Aaron’s apartment rather than her own on the second. Chris was a different issue though. Meg hadn’t actually been there for their argument but Aaron had full on kicked the guy out without even giving him a reason and yeah, she felt a little bad for him even if she didn’t know the guy too well. He was living with Miles on the floor below and honestly every time Meg saw him she felt a little guilty, as if she was somehow to blame. He always looked like such a wounded puppy that it was hard not to feel bad for him.

They had just sat down to watch some lame-ass blockbuster movie with a big bowl of popcorn when Aaron decided to drop a bombshell on her and almost made her spill the entirety of the popcorn on the floor.

“Ashley swung by today.”

“What, here?”

“Yeah. She wanted to speak to you.” Aaron was so casual about it but the news made Meg’s blood boil. What did Ashley think she was doing? Hadn’t Meg made it very clear she was done with her?

“Well what did you say?”

“I said you weren’t here,” he grunted in reply, shrugging his shoulders. He was so passé about it that Meg couldn’t help but slap him on the arm. “Ow! What the hell, Turney?!”

“What if that had been me and Chris, huh?”

“Then you would have told him I wasn’t here!”

“No, I woulda told him to fuck off! Damn it, Marquis, now she’s just gonna keep trying.” Letting out a huff, Meg slumped back onto the sofa and wallowed in her grumpy mood. Aaron glanced guiltily across at her.

“Sorry. Next time I’ll tell her to scram, okay?”

“Scram?” Meg asked in a bemused tone, raising an eyebrow at him. Had he really just said that?

In return, Aaron just poked his tongue out at her. They fell into silence after that. Meg supposed it wasn’t too bad really. Sure, conversation wasn’t quite as easy as it had been with Ashley and neither of them smiled nearly as much as they had done around their best friend and crushes but what the hell, they were surviving.

“Do you think you’ll ever speak to Chris again?” she asked suddenly, surprising herself with the question. So far they’d managed to avoid really talking about their own feelings but she just couldn’t help herself. Sometimes she wondered what would happen if she just caved and spoke to Ashley but she also knew that in reality she was too damn stubborn to do that. Besides, it would only end up with Ashley rubbing her relationship with Burnie in her face whether she meant it or not. No matter what, their friendship wasn’t going to go back to what it was so why even try?

Aaron seemed to consider his answer for a few moments. There was a conflicted expression on his face, as if even thinking about his former roommate was paining him. “I don’t know,” he muttered finally, avoiding the purple-haired girl’s eye. “Maybe? I just… not right now.”

Meg just nodded in reply. She didn’t need him to expand on what he meant because she knew exactly how he was feeling. They were in the same boat after all, only she couldn’t help but get the feeling that the boat was going to end up sinking sooner or later.

 

* * *

 

 **GavinoFree:** The second floor is so quiet now without Michael :/

 **LittleKovic:** I know! I was so used to hearing him raging on the floor below tbh

 **LittleKovic:** Feels weird without that

 **KingOfTheBeards:** How long until somebody new moves in do you think?

 **GavinoFree:** Jack! You can’t say that!

 **GavinoFree:** He’s barely even gone!

 **KingOfTheBeards:** What?!

 **KingOfTheBeards:** It’s not like he’s dead, he just doesn’t live here anymore!

 **HeirOfIsildur:** I guess I could move in

 **HeirOfIsildur:** I need a new place after all

 **LightOftheMoon:** YES

 **LightOfTheMoon:** YOU SHOULD DO THAT

 **GavinoFree:** But that’s MICHAEL’S place!

 **LittleKovic:** Chris do you promise to rage loudly?

 **HeirOfIsildur:** Um… no?

 **LittleKovic:** WRONG ANSWER

 **HeirOfIsildur:** I mean I dunno

 **HeirOfIsildur:** I like living with someone

 **LightOfTheMoon:** NO CHRIS

 **LightOfTheMoon:** DO NOT MISS THIS OPPORTUNITY

 **LightOfTheMoon:** BUY THE APARTMENT

 **LittleKovic:** #subtle

 **KingOfTheBeards:** Kinda sucks not having my Trials buddy around anymore

 **KingOfTheBeards:** Also our GTA crew is down a member

 **KingOfTheBeards:** Geoff’s getting pissy because Lindsay’s crew keeps beating us

 **GavinoFree:** I can totally help out! Love me some GTA

 **KingOfTheBeards:** Awesome!

 **GavinoFree:** Bloody offended Geoff hasn’t asked me already actually

 **KingOfTheBeards:** That’s Geoff for you

 **LightOftheMoon:** HEY CAN I PLAY

 **LightOfTheMoon:** I MEAN I SUCK AT GTA BUT STILL

 **KingOfTheBeards:** Ummmm

 **KingOfTheBeards:** I think our crew might be full?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** :’(

 **LittleKovic:** Don’t worry Miles I still love you!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** IT’S JUST NOT THE SAME JEREMY

 **KingOfTheBeards:** We were thinking of doing a heist tonight?

 **GavinoFree:** Ah can’t tonight

 **GavinoFree:** Dan’s skyping me

 **LightOfTheMoon:** are you two boning yet?

 **GavinoFree:** Me and Dan?!?!?

 **LittleKovic:** so gross

 **HeirOfIsildur:** I think you two would be cute!

 **GavinoFree:** I’m too dignified to answer that

 **LightOfTheMoon:** spoilsport

 **LittleKovic:** Gav you’re not dignified shut the fuck up

 **GavinoFree:** LOVE ME JEREMY

 **LightOfTheMoon:** BITCH NO HE’S MINE

 **LittleKovic:** I have plenty of love for the both of you!

 **Gus_Sorola:** I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING OUT WITH KDIN?

 **Gus_Sorola:** YOU’RE ALL TWO-TIMING WHORES

 **Gus_Sorola:** AND YOU’RE ALL GOING TO HELL

 **KingOfTheBeards:** …

 **KingOfTheBeards:** Gus how long have you been online?

_[LITTLEKOVIC is now offline]_

**KingOfTheBeards:** We seriously need an online users list…

 **LightOfTheMoon:** goddamn it Gus

 **Gus_Sorola:** DON’T THINK I DIDN’T NOTICE THE LACK OF INVITE TO MICHAEL’S PARTY

 **Gus_Sorola:** IT’S ALMOST LIKE YOU DIDN’T WANT ME THERE

_[KINGOFTHEBEARDS is now offline]_

_[HEIROFISILDUR is now offline]_

_[GAVINOFREE is now offline]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** i would log off if i wasn’t so obsessed with this chatroom

 **LightOfTheMoon:** but i wish i wasn’t so i could

 **LightOfTheMoon:** i may have a problem

 **LightOfTheMoon:** just know that i’m judging you

 **Gus_Sorola:** I’M JUDGING ALL OF YOU

 **Gus_Sorola:** WHEN GUS’ JUDGMENT DAY COMES YOU GUYS ARE FUCKED

 **LightOfTheMoon:** you know what?

_[LIGHTOFTHEMOON is now offline]_

**Gus_Sorola:** YOU’RE ALL GOING TO HELL

 **Gus_Sorola:** THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE WIFI THERE

 **Gus_Sorola:** BUT IF SOMEBODY WANTS TO BE MY FRIEND THEN THEY CAN GO TO HEAVEN!

 **Gus_Sorola:** ANYBODY?

_[NOBODY ELSE IS ONLINE. YOU ARE TALKING TO YOURSELF. GET A LIFE.]_

_**Gus_Sorola:** _ _WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?!_

* * *

 

The past week had been pretty good to Lindsay. She allowed herself to be sad for thirty minutes a day and that was it. She knew she wasn’t to blame for Michael leaving and there was nothing she could do about it so she wasn’t going to let herself wallow in pity. Besides, she’d got most of her mourning for their lost relationship out of the way before he’d even left for Jersey. Overall, considering she’d just gone through her first break-up in god knows how long, she felt pretty damn great.

She just wished the same could be said for Ryan.

The guy was a total mess, all guilt and disappointment wrapped up with a nice bow of self-loathing on top for good measure. Lindsay wasn’t quite sure how to take it. She was so used to him being her rock that having to be his for once was an experience in itself. She didn’t even know where to start considering his mood would change every few minutes. Either he’d be letting out a constant stream of curses at his own stupidity or he’d be so grumpy that he’d just straight up stop talking altogether.

Neither of them had been on the chatroom for once that week. Lindsay knew Ryan was too nervous to run into Jordan there but there was also the awkward chance of catching Gavin and learning that he’d found out about them. Ryan had only told Lindsay about his past meetings with Gavin and his confusing feelings for the other man very reluctantly after she’d pressured him because she knew he was hiding secrets about why Jordan had really broken up with him. Truth be told Lindsay thought it was a messy situation but Ryan had been with her through a bunch of crazy shit so she owed it to him to stick around and support him.

Lindsay didn’t really know what Ryan did for his job but she had definitely gotten the impression in the past that he didn’t love it. For the past week he’d spent probably twice as much time there and it was sort of driving her crazy. The fifth floor was nothing if she didn’t have her best friend always in so she could barge into his apartment as if it was an extension of her own. She’d been greeted by that locked door too many times.

Getting him to focus on something that wasn’t either work or his own self-pity was definitely a chore. She’d even connived with Ashley to ambush him into going to the pub with them and Burnie after work one day and that had only lasted an hour before Ryan started making every excuse under the sun so he could leave. The night ended with Ashley having to reassure Burnie that his employee didn’t actually hate him and was just going through a rough time which wasn’t exactly the best way to end the night. Ashley had seemed a bit off too, as if there was something plaguing her mind but she was much better at hiding it than Ryan was. Lindsay didn’t feel like she was quite close enough to the other woman to ask what was wrong but she definitely got the impression that a certain Meg Turney might be the issue. Right now though none of that mattered to Lindsay. She had Ryan’s drama to deal with and that had to be her priority.

“I’m telling you, let’s just go out and get a bite to eat,” she sighed for what felt like the fifth time that night. Ryan had barely even moved from the couch since he’d gotten in from work two hours ago. It was nine o’clock at night and Lindsay hadn’t eaten so much as a peanut since lunch. “ _Please_ , I’m starving here!”

“Go on without me,” Ryan huffed, dismissively waving a hand at her.

“Do you want me to cut that thing off?” Lindsay fired back menacingly. Ryan had the heart to at least look a little guilty.

“No, ma’am.”

“Just get off your ass and come to dinner with me and I won’t have to cut any body parts off.”

The conversation continued like that for several more minutes and Lindsay’s threats to cut off body parts grew slowly more unpleasant before Ryan finally caved and agreed to leave his man-cave of brooding for a change.

“Only because I happen to like my tonsils,” he muttered bitterly as he followed her out of the apartment. The smug grin on Lindsay’s face didn’t last for long. Of course it didn’t because things didn’t like to go right for her.

They had made it to the elevator and Ryan’s mood already seemed to be perking up when the doors rolled open and everything came crashing down again. The moment Lindsay saw Jordan standing there she knew she had lost. Ryan was probably going to fall apart on the spot and she’d end up having to order in. Okay, so there were worse fates but she was trying to get Ryan back into the world and that would never happen if his ex-boyfriend kept hanging out in elevators!

Unfortunately what neither of them saw was the tattooed fist flying straight towards Ryan’s face.

The punch landed solidly over his eye and Ryan stumbled back, tripping over his own feet and landing on his ass. Lindsay would have found funny if it wasn’t for the fact that her best friend had just been suckerpunched by his ex-boyfriend’s pompous moustache-growing father figure.

“That’s for hurting my son!” Geoff all but roared, his face flushed red with anger. Then he made the fatal mistake of taking a step forward, his leg already pulling back as if he was genuinely about to kick a man while he was down.

That’s when Lindsay saw red. Without any hesitation she barrelled forward, placing her hands on Geoff’s shoulders and shoving him back with as much strength as she could muster. With only one foot on the ground he toppled over without any struggle. “Watch it, Ramsey!” she snapped in return, standing as a barrier between Ryan and his attacker.

Geoff looked up at her with surprise and a healthy dose of humiliation but Lindsay wasn’t backing down. She didn’t smile, she didn’t smirk, she just glared at him without even letting herself blink. Jordan pulled Geoff up by his arm, whispering to him in panicked tones before dragging him back into the elevator.

Geoff couldn’t leave without getting the last word though. “You stay away from Jordan, you stay away from Gavin, and you stay away from my family!” he spat as the doors began to roll shut.

“You stay away from mine!” Lindsay answered for Ryan, flipping Geoff off before the doors finally closed on him. Only then did she finally allow herself to relax.

Ryan was still on the floor, one hand clasped over his eye. She could only imagine the bruise that punch was going to leave. He didn’t even glance in her direction with the other, nor did he say anything. Lindsay suddenly felt incredibly guilty. She knew it wasn’t really her fault, she wasn’t to have known that Geoff and Jordan would be waiting in the elevator for them, but her actions had ended up putting her best friend into harm’s way. That just didn’t sit right with her.

“Come on, let’s get you back inside,” she said softly, helping him back up to his feet. “I guess we’ll be ordering in after all.” The moment they were in the apartment, Ryan returned to the couch while Lindsay grabbed a bag of ice from the freezer. Then she brought Ryan his duvet and sat down on the armchair to watch Jurassic Park with him. Her choice because come on, Jeff Goldblum, but Ryan seemed to enjoy critiquing how unrealistic the dinosaurs were compared to the real life evidence. He was a nerd, sure, but he was Lindsay’s nerd so she put up with it.

When she went back to her apartment some hours later after she was sure Ryan was soundly asleep, Lindsay drank three glasses of wine and deleted Geoff off her Xbox Live friends list. She only felt marginally better for it. Luckily the wine knocked her out before she could dwell on it for too much longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can we just talk about the fact that since TBI4B started, we now have real Jordan/Geoff and Jordan/Griffon interaction (the FIFA 16 LP and Griffon's Halloween party video respectively)? The adopted Ramsey family was something I just made up for plot convenience here and yet now they're hanging out. This pleases me.
> 
> Also don't worry, I don't really wanna make Geoff look like a bad guy. You'll see where he's coming from next chapter!
> 
> Only three more chapters left after this (well, two and an epilogue) so some shit's about to go down in the next two...


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Healing takes time, something everybody learns somewhat reluctantly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOOK, A NEW CHAPTER! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO WAIT MONTHS AGAIN!

“What the _hell_ is wrong with you?!” Jordan all but yelled the moment they were safely back inside the Ramsey apartment. He wasn't big on yelling or swearing but sometimes he just couldn't stop himself. His father figure punching his ex-boyfriend and going to kick him while he was down? Yeah, that was one of those situations where he couldn’t hold back. His blood was boiling in anger, something he’d never quite felt before towards Geoff. He had always trusted and loved the man like his own father but in this moment he felt like he was glaring into the eyes of a total stranger.

“Wrong with me? Nothing!” Geoff fired back defensively. “I did that for you!”

Was Geoff hearing himself right now? What part of attempting to beat the shit out of Ryan did he think Jordan would appreciate? Yeah, maybe the punch had been just a little bit satisfying and helped Jordan feel like he was even with the man who had somewhat unknowingly broken his heart, but attempting to kick him while he was down? No, that wasn’t something Jordan wanted any credit for. “I told you that things were fine between us, that I just needed some time!” he huffed in response. “I didn’t ask you to try and beat the crap out of him!”

“Jesus! Jordan, he hurt you. He hurt you _bad_. Of course I wanna rip the fucker in two!” Geoff spat, starting to pace in the hallway. His voice was raised so of course he attracted the attention of the apartment’s other dwellers in no time at all. Griffon appeared at the end of the hallway, eyes darting between the two men stood barely inside the apartment. Confusion lined her beautiful features as she took a step forward.

“What’s going on here?” she asked in a perfectly measured tone. Jordan felt a rush of relief at her appearance. Griffon was always going to be the one to keep them sane. She had a special talent for that and he really didn’t know how she did it. Jordan liked to think that he was calm most of the time but even he had moments where he broke down and yet in all the time he had known Griffon, he hadn’t seen her calm façade break once.

“I was _defending_ Jordan’s honor,” Geoff growled, actually glaring in Jordan’s direction as if trying to keep him quiet. Usually Jordan went with whatever Geoff and Griffon told him but this time he wasn’t about to take it lying down when he felt so strongly opposed to what he had done.

“He was trying to kill Ryan,” Jordan cut across, glaring right back. “Punched him in the face. He was going to kick him while he was down if it hadn’t been for Lindsay.”

“I didn’t see you try to stop me,” Geoff countered stubbornly.

“I was in shock!” Jordan could feel his own voice raising in his frustration.

“Boys!” Just like that, Griffon managed to snap them both into silence. “Geoff, did you punch Ryan?” she asked, turning to her husband. He just nodded. “Did you then try to kick him while he was already on the ground?” she continued, the slightest hint of disapproval in her voice. After a moment of hesitation, Geoff nodded again. “You… I can’t believe I need to tell you how wrong that is,” she sighed finally, shaking her head in disappointment.

Griffon’s obvious disappointment in him only served to put Geoff even more on the defensive. “The man used Jordan to get to Gavin!” he cried out angrily.

Jordan balked at that. “I never said that!” he retorted angrily. He knew that he’d said some unpleasant things about Ryan and his interest in Gavin during the immediate aftermath of the break-up but he was sure that he’d never insinuated Ryan was just using him for that. Ryan was an asshole, sure, but he wasn’t _that_ bad.

“He constantly lied to _our sons_ and couldn’t even admit the truth when he was called to task. He judged what we have with Caleb!”

Jordan had to give Geoff that one. Ryan definitely hadn’t been all that understanding of the Ramseys’ relationship with Caleb but he’d more taken issue with the fact Jordan hadn’t told him beforehand than the relationship itself. Jordan didn’t like the fact he felt so defensive of his ex-boyfriend but it couldn’t be helped considering the accusations.

“What we have with Caleb isn’t exactly an everyday sort of relationship,” Griffon pointed out, managing to stay calm despite Geoff’s evident rage. “Ryan messed up a lot, he did. I’m not defending that, neither is Jordan. You can be upset, you can be angry, but you _cannot_ kick a man while he’s down. I cannot believe we’re even having this conversation!” While clearly still angry, Geoff at least had the decency to look somewhat ashamed even if it was just through humiliation.

Caleb chose that moment to walk in the door then. He took one look at the scene before him before his happy smile fell into a frown. “What’s going on here?” he asked, looking to Griffon for explanation.

“Nothing.” It was Geoff that answered, his voice gruff. “I’m going for a beer.” Avoiding everybody’s eye, he stormed past Caleb and slammed the door shut behind him. Immediately Jordan started after him, feeling the need to explain and at least check that the man was okay. The idea of ruining his relationship with Geoff terrified him. The Ramseys were the closest thing he had to a family here in Austin and he didn’t want to lose that, especially because of Ryan. He’d already lost too much time on him to lose anything more.

“Let him go,” Griffon said softly, causing Jordan to pause in his tracks. He turned and gave her a quizzical expression. “He needs time. Let him rage on his own, he’ll be okay.” Jordan wasn’t entirely sure that was true but he decided to let it go. He was probably the last person Geoff wanted to see right now – except maybe Ryan. He just hoped that Lindsay had the common sense not to let Ryan out of her sight any time soon. Jordan was still highly doubtful any further meetings between Geoff and Ryan would end any better. “Come on, stay. I made dinner for three anyway,” she offered, giving Jordan the warm smile he knew he couldn’t resist.

“You’re too good to me,” he murmured. Caleb threw his arm over his shoulder and led him towards the dining room. The excitement of the last fifteen minutes had all but drained Jordan and honestly it felt good to relax around his family. “Thank you.”

 

* * *

 

Ashley was overwhelmed by confusion. The party was two weeks ago now and she hadn’t spoken to Meg in that time at all. The last conversation they’d had was her best friend drunkenly admitting that she was in love with her and seeing her with Burnie was actively hurting her and the idea of their friendship ending that way and never being healed pained the blonde woman.

She knew that she didn’t love Meg, at least not in the way Meg wanted her to. They were best friends and Ashley loved her for that, but she couldn’t exactly force herself to start being romantically attracted to women, even if she was sure that Meg was worth it. Whether she liked it or not, Burnie had captured her heart and she didn’t want to feel bad about that. At the same time though, she didn’t want to upset Meg either.

Maybe she had been flaunting the relationship a little too much. That had been one of Meg’s criticisms in her drunken rant and the more Ashley thought back, the more she agreed that maybe she had dedicated a little too much of her life to her relationship with Burnie to the point of maybe neglecting her friendships. She couldn’t help it, she had been wrapped up in the thrill of a new romance and in such a short time Burnie had overtaken her world.

She was in love with Burnie, Ashley was pretty sure of that much. Maybe their relationship had moved quickly but that was what they both needed. They were hardly in their early-twenties anymore and while time wasn’t exactly running out for either of them, Ashley felt good about the rapid development of their feelings for each other. She felt comfortable around him and he made her feel loved. She knew that she shouldn’t ask for more, but she had to.

She wanted to be able to love Burnie and have Meg as her best friend. Why did that have to be too much to ask for? What was really so wrong about wanting both?

Attempting to speak to Meg had turned up fruitless multiple times. The purple-haired girl never seemed to be home whenever she knocked and after Ashley had been told by Miles that he had seen Meg lurking around on the third floor, especially with Aaron. Ashley could hardly say that she approved because she didn’t think that whatever sort of relationship Meg had with Aaron was healthy but then it wasn’t her place to judge and she knew better than to even try. Meg was doing what she needed to do and Ashley couldn’t resent her for that, even if she felt bitter that it meant Meg was avoiding her.

When she had attempted to speak to Meg by knocking on Aaron’s door, the man had treated her somewhat coldly. She should have expected it considering he was friends with Meg and had only been given her side of the stories but they were total strangers and it was affronting being treated so rudely when she was only trying to heal wounds she had unwittingly caused. All she wanted was for things to be okay again but she didn’t know how that was supposed to happen.

So, feeling dejected, she had eventually decided to stop trying. Meg needed time, that much was obvious, and while Ashley so desperately wanted to heal their friendship she knew that this wasn’t the time. Hopefully Meg would come around to the idea soon and they’d be able to start something new together but until then, Ashley was forcing herself to respect Meg’s wishes and keep her distance. If it meant throwing herself into her relationship with Burnie then so be it. She didn’t know why her own happiness had to stop just to satisfy Meg so she thought she should just buckle up and enjoy it.

They had gone out for dinner with Lindsay and Ryan which had been an experience. Burnie had mistakenly thought they were a couple which had led to an awkward explanation that Ryan was sort of completely gay and very much not interested in his best friends. They skirted around the discussion of Ryan’s break-ups because Lindsay had already given her the low down to explain why talking about it was such a bad idea. Ashley had done everything she could to get Burnie off the topic but the night ended up being more awkward than helpful.

Dates without their friends being present went a lot more smoothly. Ashley felt relaxed around Burnie in a way that almost didn’t seem possible. Sure, there were times she felt guilty about being so happy with him while Meg was still hurting for that exact reasons but there were definitely times when Burnie was able to make her so happy that she forgot about any of the drama going on at home. He made her smile brighter, laugh louder and love harder.

When Burnie stopped her at the door to her building at the end of a date some twenty days after her argument with Meg, Ashley paused in confusion.

“I want you to move in with me,” he said, giving her an almost boyish smile that was full of hope and nerves. In that moment Ashley was sure that he loved her as much as he loved him and her heart exploded for a few seconds before another feeling settled in.

She should have been over the moon. She had wanted nothing more than for her relationship to progress further but the reality of it happening made her freeze up. If she moved out there was every chance she might never patch things up with Meg. She might not see friends like Arryn, Lindsay or Ryan as much anymore. She would be leaving everything she knew and everything that made her comfortable behind in favour for something new and unpredictable.

She loved Burnie, though. She wanted to move in with him, she wanted to get married someday, maybe she even wanted kids. She was scared, yes, but she was also excited. This was the step forward she had been waiting for and yet she couldn’t quite bring herself to agree, at least not yet.

So Ashley did the only thing she could think of: she smiled, kissed him and wished him goodnight without giving him an answer. Then once she was in her apartment alone, she cried and didn’t stop until she had passed out, curled up on top of the sheets of her bed with a half-emptied bottle of wine on the counter.

 

* * *

 

Of all the places he had thought he would run into Chris, Aaron hadn’t considered the gym to be a possibility. He had gone there with Blaine to work up a sweat and maybe beat the crap out of a punching bag for a bit to work out some of his tension and there Chris had been, pacing himself on the treadmills right next to Josh. They were talking so happily and casually that it immediately pierced Aaron’s heart. He knew Chris wasn’t actually interested in Josh despite the fact the darker-skinned male was ridiculously beautiful and seriously well built because Chris was upsettingly straight. It still hurt seeing him out with somebody else though.

Much to his surprise, Blaine actually noticed. His friend wasn’t the most observant guy in the world but ever since Aaron had drunkenly confessed his feelings for Chris to him after the disastrous party for Michael’s departure, his friend had been surprisingly on the ball looking out for him. He made sure to distract Chris if they ever ended up near each other so Aaron could make a speedy mistake and kept him company whenever Meg wasn’t available so he didn’t have to think about how fucked his love life was that he would fall in love with his straight roommate.

“We can go if you want,” Blaine said quietly. They were still at the entrance of the gym and slipping away unnoticed would be easy. Chris would never even know. Aaron felt his own stubborn streak light up inside of him though because he was sick of being scared away from places just because his crush happened to be there. Did he want to talk to Chris right now? No, not really. Did he want to use the gym though? Of course, that was why he was here.

“No. We’ll stay,” Aaron said in a clipped tone. He was determined to make sure Chris didn’t fuck up his life more than he already had.

Ignoring Chris lasted for all of about fifteen minutes before the other male noticed his presence. He and Blaine had immediately gone to the weights section after warming up and were busy lifting when Aaron first felt the other’s eyes on him. Instinctively he glanced in Chris’ direction and the boy looked like a deer trapped in the headlights for a moment before he smiled meekly and got on with the rest of his workout. Aaron just hoped that would be as much as they would interact that day.

“So Kyle and Pat are getting pretty serious, huh?” Blaine asked somewhat awkwardly, trying to break through the strange tension that had built up from a single look. Aaron was welcome for the distraction, even if his mind didn’t completely leave Chris.

“Uh, yeah. Didn’t see that coming.”

“Tell me about it. I thought Kyle’s type in guys might be more… well, muscular.”

Aaron let out a snort of laughter. “Bro, watch the fat shaming.”

“Hey, I never said that! I just thought Kyle would go for guys like us, you know? Hell, I thought he was straight until this whole Patrick thing. So did he!”

“Nah, I knew,” Aaron offered with a casual shrug of his shoulders. Blaine raised an eyebrow at him. “What? I hit on him once, and yeah he didn’t bite but I could see he was tempted! I know I’m sexy so it couldn’t be that, I just clearly wasn’t his type. That guy is at least bi whether he knows it or not.”

“Why do you insist on hitting on all of my friends?” Blaine sighed, shaking his head in mock disappointment. Aaron knew that he wasn’t really upset about it though because at least it made for fun conversations in the future.

“Because you’re too straight to sleep with me,” Aaron teased in a mourning tone as he switched positions with Blaine to let the other guy have his turn at the weights. Of course as he moved he ended up glancing back over to the treadmills and found himself almost disappointed when he saw that the boys were no longer there. A quick scan of the gym premises didn’t offer up any clues to where they’d gone and Aaron was troubled by how much he cared. He wanted to get over Chris, he really did, he just didn’t know how.

“Bro. Bro!” Aaron was pulled back to reality by Blaine clicking in front of his face. “You with me?”

“Yeah,” Aaron grunted, forcing himself to man up and get over the distractions, “Come on, flex for me baby.”

Blaine very almost dropped the weight from laughing too hard. Aaron grinned, his former roommate temporarily forgotten for a fleeting moment. It was as good as he could really manage these days so he could take those moments whenever they came along.

 

* * *

 

The gym locker room was really not the place Chris wanted to be pouring his heart out but he couldn’t help it. He just couldn’t understand why this was happening. He had thought that he and Aaron were best friends. They were polar opposites, sure, but that seemed to work for them. Then Aaron had started to get weird with him after Jeremy’s party and had outright crumbled their friendship in front of him at Michael’s. Now Chris was crashing on Miles’ couch and he was fucking miserable. The worst part was that he still had no idea what had happened to send them to this point and nobody seemed to want to tell him what he’d done wrong.

“I just… am I a terrible person?” he asked Josh, trying to hold back the wetness in his eyes. He didn’t want to waste any tears, even if it was a little too late for that. He’d done his fair bit of crying ever since he’d been forced to move out of his own apartment and in with Miles.

“You’re not,” Josh assured him, resting his hand on Chris’ shoulder. Their friendship had been somewhat unexpected especially as Josh had started off as a friend of Aaron and Blaine’s, but his being there was definitely appreciated. He seemed calm and level-headed no matter what was thrown his way and that was precisely what Chris needed. “Aaron just… he’s a bit messed up right now.”

“What did I do to hurt him?” Chris asked, allowing his vulnerability to show despite himself. He didn’t want to look weak but he couldn’t fight the hurt that he felt.

“You didn’t do anything,” Josh replied, sounding somewhat strained. Chris fixed him with a hard look. He knew that Josh knew something, he just didn’t want to say. “Look bro, it’s not my place to say anything.”

“But you _know_. Please Josh, just tell me what I did and I can fix it,” he all but begged. Josh looked at him guiltily for a second before letting out at a sigh.

“You’re really clueless, aren’t you?”

“About what?”

“Aaron’s in love with you. Like, head over heels and all that shit.”

“Oh.” Chris hadn’t even considered that. He’d known that Aaron was bisexual because that was kind of hard to ignore when Aaron was constantly talking about all the different people he’d hooked with but it was those exact conversations that made him think Aaron wouldn’t want a relationship any time soon, especially one with him. “He… are you sure?” Josh just nodded. “Holy shit.”

“See, it wasn’t my place to tell.”

“No, no… I’m glad you did.” Chris was deep in thought now. The more he looked back, the more things started to make sense. How long had Aaron liked him and how long had he been clueless to the point of hurting the guy that was supposed to be his best friend? “I’m really glad. Thank you.”

He didn’t know what he was going to do with this information but he was glad he at least finally knew. Now he just had to find a way to fix things up.

“Look, I don’t wanna sound like an ass but you need to consider that things might not go back to the way they were,” Josh said softly, apparently reading his mind in the process. “You can’t keep crashing on Miles’ sofa forever either, the guy will go crazy. Well, crazier than he already is.” Chris just frowned, willing him to get to the point. “Have you thought of putting an offer down on Michael’s place?”

Chris smiled wistfully. Maybe Josh was right. Maybe he’d never live with Aaron again but that didn’t mean they couldn’t be friends. He just had to take a moment to think about his own future. Would getting his own place really be that bad? “I’ll think about it,” he said finally.

“Good. Come on, get your stuff and let’s head home. We can watch one of your nerdy hobbit movies or something.”

“I resent that accusation.”

“It’s true though.” Chris couldn’t exactly argue there.

 

* * *

 

It was two weeks after he had been assaulted by Geoff that Ryan left his house for anything more than work. He allowed himself to venture to the bar across the road from the apartment building and felt strangely relaxed. His black eye had long since faded and while he was still a bit apprehensive about running into the older man, he no longer felt like he needed to shut himself away from the entire world.

He wasn’t the only one from the apartment building there either. He shared a quick drink with Kerry and Miles before they ran off to watch some anime that had just aired. He and Patrick had discussed art for a good twenty minutes before Kyle arrived to take Patrick out on a date.

Then Gavin arrived.

Ryan’s breath hitched for just a second before an immense feeling of guilt rushed through his body. Bowing his head, he busied himself with staring into the bottom of his pint glass in an attempt not to draw any attention to himself. He had thought he had managed as such until Gavin sat down on the stool directly next to his own. “Hi Ryan,” the Brit said cheerily, all smiles and happiness.

“Hey Gavin,” the older male said, forcing himself to look up from his glass and smile weakly at the other. He felt guilty even just being around him because he knew that if Jordan saw them right now he’d feel even more betrayed than he already had. Gavin was the last person in the world he should be talking to, especially so soon. Three weeks was barely any time at all.

“Haven’t seen you about in a while. How’ve you been?” Was he seriously asking that? Ryan was beginning to wonder if he had deliberately come over just to torment him and shame him for everything that had gone down between him and Jordan.

“Okay, all things considered,” he replied in a measured tone, watching the boy’s expression closely. Gavin just smiled sadly back at him, appearing so honest that it caught Ryan off guard.

“Sorry, probably not the best thing to ask, right?” he mumbled sheepishly before turning to order his own drink. That alone surprised Ryan because it meant he was planning to stick around for longer than just a passing chat.

“It’s fine. How’re you?” he asked, wishing he didn’t care as much as he still did.

“I’m good, thanks. Off back to England next week to visit Dan.” Even knowing that Dan wasn’t actually Gavin’s boyfriend, the thought of him being so far away and visiting another guy made Ryan feel strange. He knew he had no sort of ownership over Gavin, especially considering everything that had gone down between him and Jordan, but he couldn’t deny his own feelings. He had already learned what happened when he did that and it never ended well.

“Oh, that’ll be fun.” He didn’t sound nearly as convincing as he’d hoped to be.

“Yeah, should be good.” Gavin said, apparently not picking up on the lack of enthusiasm in Ryan’s voice. Instead he just took a long gulp of his drink before setting it back down on the bar and fixing Ryan with a serious expression. “Look, Jordan told me what went down with you two. He told me _everything_ ,” he said finally, neither sounding pleased nor disapproving. The neutrality only made Ryan feel even more nervous.

“Oh. Right.” What was he supposed to say to that?

“I know it’s not my place or anything but yeah, I’m pissed off you weren’t honest with Jordan. It was shitty because he’s a top lad and he deserves better.” Ryan really didn’t need this sort of vocal battering after he’d already beaten himself up enough over it but he knew he deserved it, the same way he had deserved Geoff’s punch to the face. “But truth be told, I don’t hate you and I don’t think Jordan does either.” Wait, what? That wasn’t what Ryan had been expecting to hear at all.

“I think you’re a nice guy, actually. Yeah, you’re a fucking idiot, but a nice idiot. We all are sometimes, aren’t we?” Gavin continued, sounding a lot more light-heated the more he continued. “Things with Jordan aren’t gonna get better any time soon and yeah, Geoff’s probably always going to hate you. You’re a big guy though, I’m sure you can deal with that.”

Ryan just frowned. Where was this going? Was he supposed to be taking some sort of lesson from this?

“What I’m saying is that I wouldn’t be too opposed to hanging out with you when I get back.”

“But Jordan-” Ryan started, quickly being silenced when Gavin raised a hand.

“Jordan’s a nice guy, he understands why you did what you did and he’s okay with it now. So yeah, I don’t think he’ll give a toss if we go for drinks every now and then. Everybody needs friends, right?” Gavin explained, raising his drink as if to toast him before knocking some of it back.

Ryan hesitated before raising his own drink. He didn’t totally understand but at least he felt a little more hopeful that things would go back to being okay. He wanted to apologize to Jordan again, he really did, but like Gavin said it would take time. Suddenly taking that time didn’t seem so bad anymore. Ryan had all the time in the world to make things okay again.

 

* * *

 

Dinner at the Ramsey family was a little different this time. Neither Gavin nor Ryan was present for one thing and while Caleb was upset about Gavin not being there considering the guy was going back to the UK soon, he definitely wasn’t too fussed about Ryan being there. Anybody who hurt Jordan definitely wasn’t Caleb’s friend and that was saying something because he was the type of person who wanted to befriend everyone he ever met.

Instead of Gavin and Ryan though, they had Kdin and Jeremy. It was the first time they had been seen together since Jeremy’s disastrous birthday party and Caleb was elated to finally have their makeshift family back together again. Even Jordan seemed to be happy, all things considered. He had taken the break-up hard at first but he’d done a lot of his crying and raging in private, as if none of them could see how much he was hurting when he put on his façade of being okay. Nowadays though he seemed genuinely at peace with what had happened between him and Ryan.

Dinner was going well. It felt just like old times with them all just laughing over silly jokes and enjoying his and Griffon’s food. Even Jordan and Geoff had gotten over their hostility from a few weeks prior. Honestly Caleb couldn’t be happier about that because he couldn’t bear to see his family fighting. They were all important to him and he just wanted them to get along which was why it was so surprising when Jeremy announced that he and Kdin had an announcement to make.

“We’ve decided to split up,” Kdin said finally, shocking them all into silence. Caleb, Geoff and Jordan all looked stunned and a little horrified. Griffon was the only one who appeared unsurprised. “Things just clearly weren’t working between us and yes, we tried but we don’t think it’s healthy to keep going. I don’t want to hold Jeremy back like that.”

“This isn’t just a rash decision or anything,” Jeremy continued, speaking more to Geoff as if expecting him to have the worse reaction out of all of them. Caleb had a feeling that the presumption would definitely be true. Geoff didn’t really adjust well to any sort of change. “We considered it for a long time and it just feels right. We both need fresh starts.”

“That’s very mature of you boys,” Griffon said finally once she was sure they were done speaking. “What are you going to do about the apartment?”

“It’s Jeremy’s,” Kdin explained, not sounding at all resentful about it, “We’ve already switched the deeds over to be solely in his name. I’m moving in with a friend a few blocks away.”

Geoff looked as if he couldn’t quite believe it, as if they were playing some sort of prank on them. Caleb found himself wanting to agree. Jeremy and Kdin had been something of a constant despite their arguments. How could they suddenly be ending?

“You’ll still be welcome here whenever you want,” Griffon told Kdin, smiling warmly at him. He smiled right back at her as he nodded.

“I know. Thank you.”

Geoff got up and left the table. Immediately bot Kdin and Jeremy looked stricken. Both Jordan and Griffon moved as if to follow him but Caleb stood up first. “I’ve got this,” he told them calmly, following his boyfriend out of the room.

He found Geoff in the bedroom he shared with Griffon (and increasingly frequently him too), the lights still off. The man was sat facing the window, looking out into the dark night sky. Caleb waited a moment before moving to sit next to him. It was only when he looked closely that he realized the light of the moon was reflecting from the tears in Geoff’s eyes.

Without saying anything Caleb took the older male’s hand inside of his own and held it there. For the next five minutes Geoff just cried, finally opening up in a way Caleb had never seen before. They fell back onto the bed, Caleb happily letting the man be a little spoon to him. For so long he had been worried that he was just an ‘extra’ to Geoff and Griffon’s relationship but he was slowly starting to accept that it wasn’t true. With every passing day he started to feel more needed and more at home with them. Throughout all the hurt and heartbreak their family had been through lately, Caleb had finally found his place with them and for once, he finally felt okay with it.

 

* * *

 

Now that Ryan had finally started to open himself up to life again Lindsay felt like some of the pressure was taken off of her shoulders. She hadn’t complained once about being the man’s crutch and she didn’t resent him for it either but it felt good to be her own person again. She knew that she had needed Ryan during that time just as much as he’d needed her because she was getting used to the end of her tumultuous relationship with Michael but now that was weeks behind her and she had finally embraced the single life.

Lindsay had barely been back from drinks with Arryn, Barbara and Ashley for ten minutes before she heard a knock on her door. She’d already settled down in front of her Xbox with an open bottle of beer so moving wasn’t exactly what she wanted to do in the immediate future but she knew she couldn’t just ignore the visitor. She guessed pretty quickly that it wasn’t Ryan because he’d finally gotten to the point where he felt comfortable just walking into her apartment after a single knocking the same way she liked to intrude on his.

With a mild curiosity for who her late-night visitor was, Lindsay reluctantly pushed herself up and walked over to the door. The moment she opened it, the beer bottle dropped out of her hand and smashed on the floor.

Michael smiled sheepishly at her from where he stood in the doorway, suitcase parked behind him in the hall. “So, uh, I’m back?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to Loft 4B by untutorable which I've been re-reading lately. I didn't actually discover it until I'd started writing this fic so the similar titles are just a really weird coincidence but it's a pretty amazing Lindsay-centric fic with some great pairings and honestly it's one of the best written fics I've ever read from any fandom. You guys should all check it out if you haven't already!
> 
> Only one more full chapter and an epilogue after this. What do you guys think is going to happen?


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lindsay, Jordan and Gavin deal with uncertainty while Aaron and Meg think about the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S HERE, THE FINAL CHAPTER IS HERE!

The girl who had moved in just across the hall from him was going to make his life difficult, Ryan knew it already. 5C had been quiet and unoccupied for months but then Lindsay Tuggey had come along and changed everything. Ryan had been quite content having no real relationships with any of the people on his floor but Lindsay made that a near impossibility with her determination to befriend nearly everybody in the building. He had no idea how it was possible for a person to be that talkative and energetic so often but eventually he had chosen to give up and just accept that while Lindsay lived in 5C he probably wasn’t going to get nearly as much sleep, nor would his life ever be considered boring again.

He wasn’t wrong. Within a few weeks of her being there, Ryan had gone from being a recluse in his own apartment building to knowing a fair few people he had probably lived alongside for months if not years now. Lindsay had even introduced him to an online chatroom on the building’s local server which the occupants used to talk. It was supposedly to file complaints or remind people of important building-wide notices but it was never used for that. The occupants had made it into some sort of game, encouraging them to be anonymous by using usernames so they could have the freedom of talking shit online without being shamed in public for their thoughts.

That didn’t last long either. Apparently not everybody was so keen on the anonymous usernames idea and while Ryan was clueless to the vast majority of people in the chatroom there were definitely some he had guessed straight away. He hadn’t quite realized just how many colourful personalities there were in his building but Lindsay and the chatroom had shone an unwanted light onto that and now he couldn’t ignore it even if he tried. There was always something going on in Austin Heights, he just happened to be unlucky enough to live in it.

One of the chatroom’s frequent and technically banned uses was the promotion of parties happening on the third floor. User ‘Punkelman’ was always in charge of them, decorating her apartment in a variety of themes to fit whatever mood she was in this week. Ryan had come home late from work to find people in togas before, dressed up as 80’s film characters and even as human memes. Needless to say he made a point of keeping as far away as possible from those parties.

Which is why when Lindsay came knocking on his door one Friday afternoon and told him that he was going to accompany her to “Barb’s party” that evening, he flat out refused. For one thing a ‘barbed party’ sounded more painful than fun and for another, Ryan didn’t _do_ parties. He’d just come home from work, he was sore and he was tired and he just wanted to be left alone. Unfortunately that wasn’t an option with Lindsay.

“It’ll be fun!” she exclaimed, practically chasing him around his apartment.

“You and I have very different ideas of fun,” Ryan huffed, throwing a glare over his shoulder at her. Lindsay didn’t seem deterred at all.

“Come on, the theme is ‘what I wanna be when I grow up’, you’re practically done with your costume already!” And then, as if that wasn’t bad enough: “You know, because you’re old and stuff.”

“I hate you, Lindsay Tuggey.”

“Liar!” she scoffed in return, completely unfazed.

The argument continued for some time after that and it was only after Ryan had cracked open a beer and all but chugged it down in one go that he finally relented. Lindsay clearly wasn’t giving up so he’d go to the dumb party for maybe an hour maximum and leave. At least he’d get her off of his back for a change.

Half an hour later and Ryan was freshly showered, shaved and wearing a pair of new slacks. Lindsay took one look at him and raised an eyebrow. “I’m not dressing up,” he told her in a warning tone. She had gone for a red dress and devil horns that made him seriously question her morality but there was no way Ryan was adorning any sort of costume. When he was a kid he’d wanted to be a palaeontologist because he’d had an obsession with Jurassic Park but he didn’t exactly keep an Alan Grant costume lying around just in case.

The elevator ride down to the party on the third floor was an experience in itself. They were joined by somebody Lindsay introduced as JJ who lived on the sixth floor and was dressed as a bumblebee which Ryan decided not to question. Somehow he had moved into a building full of insane people without even realizing it. Lindsay and JJ talked animatedly for the whole journey down which was thankfully rather brief. What was waiting for him on the other side of those elevator doors was something else entirely though.

The party seemed to have spilled out of 3E and into 3C next door. There wasn’t a single person not dressed up in some over-exaggerated costume and Ryan suddenly felt strangely insecure at his lack of one. He still thought it was ridiculous, sure, but he didn’t like to be the odd one out.

“Lindsay, hey!” An excited, clearly rather drunk blonde girl in a Freddie Kreuger costume appeared. The red solo cup in her hand wobbled so precariously that Ryan took a step back so the alcohol wouldn’t splash all over him. “You guys made it!”

“Barb!” Lindsay bounced from foot to foot for a few moments before pulling the blonde into a hug. As expected, the alcohol splashed straight onto the floor. Neither of them noticed. “This is Ryan, he lives in 5D!” Barb pulled out of the hug and looked at him with glazed over eyes, smiling nonetheless.

“Nice to meet you, Ryan!” she slurred, clearly unsteady on her feet. Ryan just smiled weakly back at her but he was saved from any further interaction by a muscular guy appearing and wrapping his hands around Barbara’s waist to pull her away. “Blaine! Blaine, stop or I’ll throw up all over you!” Luckily they were both out of sight before Ryan could see if she was telling the truth.

Turning to Lindsay, he just shook his head. “Your friends are weird.”

“Oh lighten up, Grandpa. Go grab a beer, say hello to some people. You’ll love it!” As if determined to force him out of her comfort zone, Lindsay disappeared with JJ barely seconds later and was totally lost in the throng of people.

It would have been easy to walk straight back into the elevator and return to the fifth floor but something stopped him. Letting out a resigned sigh, Ryan forced himself to walk through the crowd and into 3E in a desperate search for some alcohol to help him through the night.

“Ugh, I can already tell she’s straight. I wanna cry,” a red-haired Catwoman said to a height-accurate Wolverine as Ryan brushed past.

“If I have to hear Aaron banging another dude _one more time_!” a far-too-tall Hobbit threatened as a man dressed as a werewolf – or possibly a Teen Wolf? – nodded sympathetically.

Finally Ryan reached the dining table where a whole host of drinks had been laid out. There were bottles of beer neatly lined up and half a dozen spirits waiting in a bucket of ice, as well as all the mixers behind them. Ryan watched in interest ad amazement as a short blonde girl picked up a beer bottle and pulled the cap off with her teeth. It was surely damaging for her teeth but by god it was pretty astounding to watch.

Ryan had barely taken a sip of his first beer when somebody approached him. The guy had little more than a long black cape and some pale make-up but he had still put marginally more effort in than Ryan. “You’re not wearing a costume,” the new arrival said, catching him off guard with his English accent. He had never been very good at discerning the different English accents because why would it even matter to him? They were in Texas for crying out loud, it wasn’t as if they had a large British population.

“Actually I am,” Ryan countered, remembering to speak after a few moments of staring at the guy in surprise. Underneath all the pale face-paint, he was actually pretty handsome. Sure, maybe his nose was a little on the large side and his hair was too big to be anywhere near tameable but there was definitely something cute about him and that was distracting enough on its own.

“Oh yeah, what do you wanna be when you’re older then?” the Brit asked almost suspiciously.

“Lazy.”

The vampire practically snorted his drink at that, some of it splashing down onto Ryan’s feet. He found himself strangely unconcerned about that because all he could think was how cute the guy was when he laughed.

“Bloody hell, that’s good.”

“What about you? Vampire, huh?” Ryan asked, suddenly willing the conversation to go on a little longer. It was nice to have some company especially considering the madness going on either side of him.

“It was a make do and mend thing,” the Brit said, shrugging his shoulders.

“You just had a cape lying around?”

“Nah, my mate Jordan did. Not quite sure why actually. That’s probably a little weird, innit?” he asked, making himself laugh. Ryan found himself chuckling along.

“Probably, yeah,” he agreed.

“I’m 4B by the way,” the guy said, holding out his free hand, “You’re up on fifth, right?”

“5D,” Ryan confirmed as he gave the other a firm handshake. He was honestly surprised the guy recognized him enough to know he was from the fifth floor. How was that even possible? Ryan was pretty sure he’d never seen the guy before in his life but then again he had spent most of his time living in Austin Heights as a social recluse. Had he really been blocking people out that much that he didn’t even remember what the majority of his neighbors even looked like?

They continued talking for a good ten minutes after that. Being right next to the makeshift bar only encouraged them to drink more and before Ryan knew it he had finished his third beer bottle and the world felt a bit shaky. That was what happened when you started to drink a lot more after spending years staying sober. Now that he had a few drinks in him and some decent company the party didn’t seem so bad after all.

It was only when a bespectacled young man dressed as a dragon came up to pull the Brit away that Ryan realized he’d never gotten his actual name.

 

* * *

 

 

“So, uh, I’m back?”

Lindsay slammed the door in Michael’s dumb face. It was a split-second reaction because she honestly had no idea what to do with herself in that moment. She’d thought that maybe it was Ashley needing to vent about Meg some more or maybe Geoff coming to grovel an apology for starting a fight with Ryan. Michael Jones ending up at her door? No. That was too much to handle.

“Lindsay?”

The muffled voice from the other side of her door didn’t exactly calm her down at all. Why the hell was he even here? Wasn’t he supposed to be in Jersey being a good little mommy’s boy or something? Lindsay was finally starting to feel okay being on her own again and now here he was just to torment her. Had she drank too much when she was out of the girls? Was Michael nothing more than a hallucination her self-deprecating mind wanted her to suffer through?

“Uh, are you gonna open the door again?”

“No!” she yelled back.

“Okay.” There was a pause. Lindsay closed her eyes and silently prayed that he would make this easier for the both of them and just walk away. He could go back to Jersey and Lindsay could drink some more until she passed out and forgot about this the next day. It would be easy. “Can we at least talk?” Nope, there was no hope in Michael leaving.

“Not really?” Lindsay didn’t like how uncertain her voice sounded. She wanted to be certain, she wanted to turn Michael away with confidence but there was a part of her that just wouldn’t allow it. A part of her still wanted to hear him out. Why had he really come all the way back to Austin from Jersey? It wasn’t exactly a painless journey.

“Well I’m gonna stay here and talk, if that’s okay?” Michael didn’t even sound like himself. His voice was softer, his words more careful than Lindsay remembered them ever being.

“I guess I can’t stop you,” she grumbled, leaning back against the wall besides her door. She stared miserably down at the smashed beer bottle on the floor and the mess it had created, wondering whether she was sad because it meant she had to do some cleaning or because it was a total waste of beer. Probably a bit of both.

There was a long pause before Michael spoke again. The silence suddenly seemed deafening and Lindsay hated herself for wishing one of them would fill that silence with at least some sort of lame joke. “Look, I’m a fucking asshole,” he said finally.

Lindsay just laughed. “Yeah, I got that much for myself.”

“I know. I suck big time and I’m the worst and all that bullshit, yeah? I put you through a load of crap and I’m sorry.”

“You’re not wrong,” Lindsay muttered under her breath. She wouldn’t say that she hated Michael for what he’d put her through but she was hardly his biggest fan. She had been so scared of opening up to anybody and the moment she had he’d turned his back on her and left. The wounds hadn’t exactly healed overnight either.

“I just got back to Jersey and I realized that I didn’t give a shit if the job was good or if my family needed me to do it because it wasn’t what _I_ wanted.” There was a slight thump from the other side of the door. Lindsay risked a glanced through the peephole to see Michael sat below her, back against the door and facing Ryan’s apartment. She _really_ hoped her best friend wasn’t home right now because this wasn’t a scene he needed to see. “I wanted to be here,” Michael continued, his voice sounding more vulnerable and open than Lindsay had ever known it to be. “I wanted to be with you so please, if you think that maybe someday you can forgive me, just open the door.”

Fuck. Fucking fuck. A part of Lindsay had known ever since he had turned up at her door that he was about to make some big confession to her because why else would he have come all this way without calling instead? It didn’t lessen the impact of him actually saying those words though and for a moment she felt herself freeze up. Her heart was suddenly beating double time and she had absolutely no idea what to do or say. For so long she had thought that her relationship was little more than a bit of part-time fun to Michael but would he really give up a job for that?

The idea that she could be anything more than a fleeting interest to anyone made Lindsay want to laugh but here Michael was begging for her forgiveness and proving that maybe she wasn’t as much of a lost cause as she thought she was.

“Lindsay? You still there?”

She didn’t immediately reply. Instead she let herself think about it, seconds turning into minutes. Her brain rocked between stubborn individuality and a need to let somebody into her life and heart for a change. She didn’t know which of the two was stronger until her hand was already on the door handle.

Michael all but fell against her feet as she pulled open the door and she couldn’t help but let out a snort of laughter as he looked up at her in utter bewilderment. “You opened the door,” he breathed, the surprise evident in his voice. Lindsay couldn’t blame him. She’d even doubted herself that she was going to do it.

“Shut up,” she muttered, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and pulling him up to his feet. He moved willingly with her, not struggling at all despite how tight her grip probably was. She figured that she deserved that much at least. He was wise enough to do as he was told too. “Just kiss me already.”

For once Michael didn’t need telling twice. Without any resistance Lindsay pulled him in by his collar until their lips met and slowly things started to feel okay again.

 

* * *

 

“You know Chris is putting an offer in on Michael’s apartment, right?”

Aaron was surprised by just how much that sentence really bothered him. Blaine hadn’t really meant to upset him or anything, he had just wanted to keep him in the know but it didn’t change the fact that it made Aaron want to punch something. He settled for glaring at Blaine instead.

“Woah, don’t look at me like that. I’m just the messenger!”

It had been weeks since Aaron had forced Chris out of their apartment and sure he felt a little guilty about the fact Chris was crashing on Miles’ couch but he needed space. He needed to try and clear his head of the thoughts and feelings he had for the boy who was supposed to be nothing more than his roommate and best friend. Somehow things had become complicated along the way and everything had gone to shit in the process.

It was only when Blaine confirmed that maybe Chris was moving on and didn’t want to come back that Aaron realized he’d made a big mistake. It wasn’t fair of him to be angry at Chris for not returning his feelings. Even if Chris had been anything other than straight it still wouldn’t be fair and the thought of losing him altogether just because he couldn’t get his shit together seriously troubled Aaron. He hadn’t meant for this to happen, he had been drunk and couldn’t take it back once it had been said. He was too stubborn for his own good, which was his problem.

Blaine had taken Aaron out for drinks at a bar to distract him when he’d broken the news but it had dwelled on Aaron’s mind for the rest of the night. He couldn’t focus on anything Blaine was saying on the walk home because he was too busy thinking about how his own stupidity and selfishness had lost him the best friend he’d ever had. In fact he was so wrapped up in his own thoughts that he didn’t even notice that when they entered the lobby to Austin Heights, there was already somebody there waiting for them.

Chris pushed himself up from the chair he’d been waiting on for the last half an hour ever since Blaine had text him to say that they were on their way back. He knew that Blaine and Josh didn’t have to help him out and they were probably only doing it to stop Aaron from acting like a whiny bitch all of the time but he appreciated it anyway. He knew there was no chance he was going to get Aaron to himself in his apartment because he would either never answer the door or Meg would be around so ambushing him in a more public area seemed like his only chance. It had been a few days since Josh had finally told him the truth about what he had done to upset Aaron and he wanted to finally correct that. He needed to because he knew he couldn’t keep living a few floors below knowing that he had lost his only best friend all because of a misunderstanding.

Aaron glanced up and froze like a deer when he saw the other waiting for him. “I’ll give you two a moment,” Blaine said in a hushed tone before he slipped away to leave them in private. Aaron wanted to run after Blaine or just straight up run away but he couldn’t. He already felt guilty for what he had put Chris through and doing it all over again would only make things worse.

“Hi,” Chris said finally, waving at him in his usual awkward fashion. It was so goddamn endearing that it made Aaron’s heart flutter. It always had but knowing that Chris would never feel his heart beat faster because of him hurt too. Then again, that wasn’t something he could really ask for.

“Hey.” Aaron wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole but he had no such luck. “How have you been?” He was probably opening a can of worms even asking that question but he couldn’t help it, he still cared about Chris.

“Okay,” Chris lied, still wearing an awkward smile to hide the truth. “You?”

“Yeah, I’m okay too.” Aaron hated himself for lying. There were already too many lies between them. “Well, I’ve been better,” he corrected himself, glancing down at the floor just so he didn’t have to look Chris in the eyes.

Chris let out a small sigh and shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah, I guess I have been too.”

The guilt Aaron felt for throwing Chris out of his own home was definitely multiplied by that. “Heard you’re moving into Michael’s old place?”

“Yeah, I put an offer down yesterday.”

“Good for you,” Aaron said, giving the other male a weak smile as he finally looked up. “That’s… yeah, that’s awesome.”

For a few moments, neither of them said anything. Chris nervously shifted from foot to foot and bit down on his lower lip as if he was holding back something he desperately wanted to say.

“Chris?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m so fucking sorry.” Aaron wasn’t sure where the courage had come from to finally speak out but he was glad he had started because he knew he couldn’t stop now. “I wasn’t fair. I let my feelings take over and fuck, dude, I’m so fucking sorry.” There was a stinging in his eyes as they filled with tears and Aaron was quick to wipe them away. He hated crying, especially in front of other people.

“I’m sorry too, y’know? Sorry I can’t be the guy you need me to be,” Chris replied quietly, looking guilty despite himself. The reply didn’t do much to console Aaron, if anything it made him feel worse in a surprising way.

“Hey, you have nothing to apologize about. You can’t help it, I know. It was silly of me to even think you could. This isn’t your fault,” Aaron argued. He didn’t want to let Chris take any of the blame because it wasn’t really his fault at all. He’d been in the dark about the whole thing and Aaron hadn’t even stuck around long enough to explain himself, he’d just told him to get out.

“I can’t help but feel like it is,” Chris said sheepishly, glancing down at the floor. Aaron wasn’t quite sure when he’d moved so close but he rested a hand on his friend’s shoulder and gave it a light squeeze.

“Please Chris, believe me. It’s not your fault at all, okay? I’ve been an ass all because my feelings got hurt and it was childish. Don’t try and take any of the blame for that, okay?”

“Well if I wasn’t so handsome maybe you wouldn’t have a crush on me, huh?” Chris joked, wiping away his own tears. Aaron burst into laughter then and it felt like the most fantastic thing Chris had heard in a long time.

“You’re a fucking dork, you know that?” Aaron said between bouts of laughter, clapping him on the shoulder again.

“Oh I know,” Chris agreed, finding a smile sitting rather naturally on his face. It was still awkward but it was something. He felt like he hadn’t smiled around Aaron in a long time.

“You don’t have to move out, you know. It was unfair of me to make you leave so if you still want it, the room’s yours,” Aaron said seriously, a hopeful expression on his face.

Chris’ smile faltered for a second. “I’d love to,” he started before shaking his head. “I just think that maybe I need this. Maybe we both do, you know?” Once again he found himself wiping the tears away from his cheeks. Damn it, why did he always have to keep crying?

Aaron felt his heart deflate somewhat but he nodded anyway. “I understand,” he muttered before pulling Chris into a hug. “You’re a much better person than I am. You deserve better than me.”

“Shut up and just enjoy the moment, dumbo,” Chris hissed, unable to hide the laughter from his voice as he embraced his best friend in return. Perhaps it wasn’t quite what either of them had been expecting but it felt refreshing to finally be on the same page even if it left them at different places. Wasn’t that just a part of growing up though?

They spent the rest of the night in Aaron’s apartment, packing up the rest of Chris’ possessions into boxes ready for his move to the floor below. There was laughter, there was tears but most of all there was an understanding that things were finally going to be okay again. It was more than either of them could have asked for.

 

* * *

 

While Aaron was occupied renewing his friendship with Chris, Meg was sat alone in the bar across the street from Austin Heights staring at her phone every now and then. He had promised her that he would come and meet her after hanging out with Blaine but it wouldn’t be the first time he’d gotten too drunk for his own good and had to head home early. She really just wished he could have the decency to text her and let her know so she didn’t feel like she was being stood up.

As always the bar was occupied by familiar faces from the apartment building but Meg felt somewhat closed off from them and she wasn’t quite sure why. Patrick and Kyle were there enjoying each other’s company so of course she didn’t want to interrupt. She probably could have gone and sat with Kdin and Caleb or maybe even Miles, Kerry and Kara but she knew that she didn’t want any of that. She didn’t even want Aaron.

She wanted Ashley and that was the problem. Why did she always have to want the one person she couldn’t have? It had been breaking her apart for months as she sat in silence as the suffering best friend while Ashley gushed about Burnie but now there was an Ashley-sized hole in her life and she felt even worse for it. She wasn’t just in love with Ashley, Meg _loved_ her. She loved being her friend, she loved being her neighbour and she loved being her confidant. She didn’t have any of that anymore and it was killing her.

With maybe a couple too many drinks in her system as she realized that Aaron was probably not going to turn up after all, Meg started to miserably consider heading home when she felt a familiar presence sit down at the bar beside her.

“How much have you had?” Ashley asked, her voice soft and concerned. The butterflies in Meg’s stomach fluttered a little as they always did when her best friend was around. Were they even best friends anymore? That seemed doubtful with the way Meg had been treating her lately.

“Probably too much,” Meg slurred, unable to bring herself to even look at the woman beside her.

Ashley paused for a moment, considering her words carefully. Meg was surprised she’d even stuck around after seeing how much of a mess she was. “I think we should talk,” Ashley said finally. It wasn’t forceful or angry but it didn’t leave much room for argument either. Meg wasn’t even sure she had it in her to argue anymore. She felt defeated as if all the energy from avoiding Ashley and hating Burnie had exhausted her to the point she couldn’t even be angry if she wanted to.

“Sure. Let’s talk,” she huffed, all but dragging her body to the side so she could look at Ashley properly. She was just as beautiful as she remembered and Meg hated herself for going straight o that thought. How she wished that she could see Ashley as nothing more than a friend but that didn’t seem possible. She loved Ashley for so much more than her beauty no matter how overwhelming it was but in Meg’s drunken state it was all she could really focus on.

“Burnie asked me to move in with him,” Ashley said, delivering a figurative blow straight to Meg’s heart in the process. The purple-haired girl felt her jaw go slack as she processed the news. Ashley watched her carefully before continuing. “I haven’t given him an answer yet.”

“Why not?” Meg asked curiously, starting to feel a little more sober. She probably wasn’t sobering up at all but she knew that this needed her full attention and she was done wallowing in her drunken pity.

“Because I don’t want to go if it means we’re never going to fix this. You’re worth too much for me to lose.”

Meg wasn’t quite sure what to say. It was everything she had wanted to hear and everything she hadn’t all at the same time. Ashley was never going to love her the way she wanted her to, she knew that now but the idea that she cared enough to put her own happiness on hold? That was a sign that Meg couldn’t just ignore.

“I think you should go,” she said finally, before snapping to attention a second later. “Not go as in _leave_ like right now! Go as in move! Move… in with Burnie,” she corrected herself, a blush of embarrassment colouring her cheeks. A part of her couldn’t even believe what she was saying. A few weeks ago and she would have begged Ashley to stay but was that really fair of her to ask?

“Are you sure?” Ashley asked, frowning. “I don’t want to go if it means we’ll never—look, you’re really important to me. You know that, right?” After a moment of hesitation, Meg nodded. “I don’t think I can leave if we’re never going to be the same again.”

“But we’re not,” Meg pointed out, placing her hands in her lap and sighing. She wasn’t sure why she felt quite so content considering how much she’d had to drink and how much she’d dreaded this very conversation. “That’s not a bad thing either though. I can’t spend the rest of my life being helplessly in love with you and getting nothing back.” A guilty expression immediately crossed Ashley’s face and she opened her mouth to counter but Meg continued. “It’s not your fault you don’t love me, I get it now. You love Burnie and if you’re happy then I’m happy for you. Just… maybe it’s best if you’re happy somewhere else for now.”

For a few moments Ashley didn’t say anything. She just stared, the shock evident on her face. Meg could see the hurt there too but she didn’t feel as guilty as she might have previously. This was what they both needed, she was sure of it now.

“Okay,” the blonde said finally, her face relaxing into a gentle smile. Meg was happy to return it.

“Okay.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Meg asked the bartender for a glass of water so she could at least try and sober up. Then, without much warning, Ashley leaned in and placed a kiss on her forehead. “You’re my best friend, Meg. Please remember that,” she whispered.

“I will,” Meg promised. Then, as Ashley left, she let out a small sigh of relief. It felt as if a giant weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Wiping the wetness away from her eyes, Meg grabbed her glass of water and made her way across the bar to sit with her friends. Patrick immediately wrapped a comforting arm around her and she rest her head on his shoulder, laughing at the dramatic look of over-the-top jealousy Kyle gave her.

“This one’s a keeper, Pat,” she muttered to her friend. He just beamed back at her.

“Trust me, I couldn’t lose him even if I tried.” He blew Kyle a kiss for good measure. In a move that was far too dorky for a guy that had clearly been some sort of sports captain back in high school, Kyle plucked it from the air and pocketed it. Meg laughed so hard that she couldn’t hold back the tears any longer.

 

* * *

 

England was strange. Gavin hadn’t lived there for some time and he certainly hadn’t considered it his home either. Sure, his real family was there and so was Dan but that was it. He had a family and a life in Austin. He had friends and a job and everything he could possibly want. These trips back home only served to remind him what was waiting for him in Austin at the end of another plane journey.

He knew that it would be unfair to ask Dan to keep visiting him and then never coming back to the UK in return which was why he forced himself to do it every now and then. It usually wouldn’t be so soon after Dan had visited him because he had barely left a few weeks ago and here Gavin was, already back in his country of birth. Then again there was a reason for that though. Things had ended pretty badly with Dan last time and he needed to correct that.

Even though he considered Jordan, Caleb, Jeremy and Kdin his family (not to mention Geoff and Griffon who were basically his parents), Dan was his best friend and had been for a long time. He told Dan everything and never held back. He’d told Dan about how scared he’d been when he’d first moved to Austin for his job, he’d told Dan about the time he thought Caleb was hitting on him and he’d told Dan about the time he met a hunky older man at one of Barbara’s party and had absolutely no idea how to him.

You see, Gavin hadn’t gotten the older man’s name and he cursed himself for that pretty much every day afterwards. All he knew was that the guy lived in 5D and he was ridiculously good looking in the sort of ‘normal person’ way. He wasn’t a supermodel or anything but he was pleasant on the eyes and he was funny and Gavin may have spent a little too long thinking about their sole encounter. They had passed each other in the halls of Austin Heights a few times since then but it wasn’t until Jordan had gushed to him about Ryan, his adorable older boyfriend, that he actually met the guy again. Sure enough Jordan’s new boyfriend that he was so clearly head over heels for was the very same guy Gavin had been dreaming about for months.

He decided to do what any good friend should and keep his mouth shut about his own feelings, instead focusing on being happy for Jordan instead. The other guy meant a lot to him so putting his happiness first was something Gavin was more than prepared to do. They were family, after all.

That didn’t stop him from tearing his hair out behind closed doors though. Dan had known something was wrong immediately and he wouldn’t let it drop until Gavin had finally owned up to the truth and told him that Jordan’s boyfriend was the same guy Gavin had been quietly pining after for months. He’d kicked himself enough for not taking the first step and introducing himself properly to 5D when he had the chance but then it had been too late and there was nothing he could do but be happy for Jordan and try to move on.

Dan hadn’t seen it that way though. He had been blunt in saying that Gavin needed a rebound to get over his feelings. That maybe he should pull away from Jordan so seeing Ryan would hurt less. Gavin knew his best friend was just trying to look out for him but each of Dan’s ideas was worse than the last and it had driven him crazy until the point he snapped and told Dan to leave. He hadn’t quite expected Dan to fly all the way back to England the day after but he had and Gavin knew he had an apology to make and it wasn’t one he could do over the phone.

Jordan had come to him shortly after Dan had left to ask what had gone down. He was probably too observant for his own good because he could tell that Gavin was lying when he said that everything was fine but unlike Dan he didn’t pressure him. He let Gavin have his space but maybe that was more to do with the fact that he was having his own issues with Ryan. Gavin had done his best to stay out their relationship because of his own conflicting feelings but when Jordan broke in tears a short while after their break-up. He’d held it together when they’d both been hanging out in Jeremy’s apartment but the moment Jeremy had left them for a food run, Jordan had completely broken down and all but sobbed apologies into Gavin’s lap.

“I never liked him anyway,” Gavin lied, doing his best to be supportive after Jordan had explained that they’d broken up because Ryan was interested in somebody else.

“Liar,” Jordan said, catching him totally off guard as he pushed himself back up. “Come on, Gavin. I’m not dumb.”

“I… wasn’t saying you were.”

Jordan had the strangest bittersweet smile on his face that made Gavin feel almost nervous. “Ryan’s the guy you always used to talk about, isn’t he? The one from Barb’s party?” Gavin all but confirmed it by avoiding his friend’s eye. “It’s okay, I’m not mad.”

In many ways Jordan was a much better person than Gavin could ever be and he knew that. Jordan was compassionate where Gavin was sarcastic, he was welcoming where Gavin was closed off. They complimented each other perfectly in their opposite ways and they loved each other like family because that was what they were. So rather than make it about him, Gavin just held Jordan’s hand and let him cry until he felt okay again.

Dan, on the other hand, was harder to get forgiveness from. His attempt at Skype calling his best friend had ended before it even began when Dan had refused to even pick up the call. Gavin couldn’t say he was actually all that surprised because they could both be rather stubborn when they wanted to be. Luckily he already had the plane ticket booked because he was going to get his best friend to see eye to eye with him again even if it killed him.

“Look B, I get it. You were looking out for me, I know,” Gavin huffed when he was safely in Dan’s apartment but still pacing around somewhat angrily. “Jordan’s my family and I couldn’t just ditch him like that.”

“Yeah but at the cost of hurting yourself? That’s messed up, B. I don’t want you to get hurt.” That was Dan’s problem, he worried too much. Sometimes it was touching because Gavin wasn’t sure he’d ever had anybody who cared about him half as much as Dan did but other times it could come across as overbearing.

“I’m not! Jordan and Ryan aren’t even together anymore! They’re… they broke up and I’m pretty sure it’s because of me.”

Just like that, Dan softened. He ushered Gavin onto the sofa and let him rant about everything. He let Gavin rant about how he felt like he was stabbing Jordan in the back with his feelings for Ryan, he ranted about how he couldn’t even be sure if he even really liked Ryan because he barely knew the guy and he ranted about how much it sucked thinking his best friend hated him. Dan had pulled him into a tight embrace at that. “I could never hate you,” he muttered into Gavin’s ear, all while crushing him between his strong arms.

“What do I do?” Gavin asked later that night when they were together on Dan’s bed, enjoying the moonlight pouring into the bedroom. There was nothing romantic about it as there never had been between them but Gavin felt more comfortable than he had in a long time. He knew where he stood with Dan but everything else felt uncertain. How would he feel about Ryan once he actually got to know him? Would he always feel like he was betraying Jordan if he ever became more with the man? There were too many uncertainties and it made Gavin anxious.

“One step at a time, B,” Dan assured him, running his hands through Gavin’s hair. “You got this, I know it.”

Gavin boarded his plane home the next weekend with his head held high and a newfound confidence he’d been lacking for too long. Dan waved him off and promised to visit sooner rather than later, a promise that Gavin knew he would keep. After all, they were best friends and they could never spend too long apart. That was the whole point of having a best friend.

 

* * *

 

Acceptance and healing came hand in hand for Jordan. He wasn’t a big believer in spirituality or anything like that but he could feel himself becoming whole again as time passed from his break-up with Ryan. He had been uncharacteristically angry and understandably upset after that but now those intense feelings seemed like a world away. He didn’t hurt when somebody mentioned his name, he didn’t even feel the stab in his heart whenever he saw the older male in the distance anymore. Instead he smiled fondly at the memories of the few good times they shared together and focused on moving on from what was over.

After Jeremy had caught him crying into Gavin’s lap and the Brit apologizing over and over to him, he had been forced to explain the full story to him too. He told him about Gavin’s crush on a random guy at a party and how that guy happened to end up being Jordan’s boyfriend. He didn’t hide the fact Ryan had a crush on Gavin either, even though it made Jeremy frown in concern.

“You don’t sound very upset about this,” Jeremy pointed out.

Jordan stopped to consider it for a moment. “I guess I don’t.”

“How does it make you feel? Ryan liking Gavin?”

Again, Jordan had to consider it. At first he’d been outraged by the idea and had felt understandably betrayed but now? Well now it felt like none of his business. “He can like whoever he likes,” he replied after a while, casually shrugging his shoulders. Jeremy raised an eyebrow at him. “I’m not his keeper!” Jordan added.

“Okay but what about Gavin having a crush on Ryan?”

That was harder for Jordan to consider. He knew that technically Gavin had known and crushed on Ryan for longer but that had only come to light afterwards. It was still difficult to get his head around but did it upset him as much as he thought it might? Strangely, no. “I don’t know,” he admit honestly. “I want him to be happy and I want Ryan to be happy too so…”

“So you’d be fine if that happiness was them together?” As always, Jeremy was a calm and collected middle ground. Jordan considered the idea. How would he really feel if Gavin brought Ryan around to family dinners? Geoff would never allow that to happen, of course, but the thought brought a smile to his lips. If they would end up happily together then who was he to stand in the way of that?

“Yeah. I think I would be.”

With Gavin in England for the rest of the week, Jordan had plenty of time to thought over what he and Jeremy had discussed. The more he thought about it the more he realized just how okay he was with the idea of Gavin and Ryan being together. Maybe there would always be that small part of him that would always be in love with Ryan but then Jeremy would always have a part of him that was in love with Kdin and that didn’t mean they had to spend their lives together.

The Ramseys threw a celebration dinner when Gavin returned from his trip and it was easily one of the best nights in recent memory. Griffon and Caleb had cooked up a delicious feast and Geoff seemed much calmer than he’d been in a long while. Kdin and Jeremy arrived separately but they were pleasant to each other all night. Kdin shared stories about he and his new roommate Val were getting on while Gavin repeated lame jokes Dan had told him back in England. By the end of the night Jordan’s sides hurt from laughing so much.

As he stepped out of the apartment at the end of the night, he found an unfamiliar face struggling with the lock on apartment 6C. That was JJ’s old apartment and it had been vacant since he’d left months ago. “You alright there?” he asked, startling the stranger. The guy has a mop of black hair and a nervous disposition about him but honestly all Jordan saw was how _cute_ he was.

“Uh yeah, the lock’s just a bit stiff.”

“JJ always used to have that problem. He was too lazy to talk to the building owner though so you should probably get on that,” Jordan sympathized. “Here, let me have a go.”

The guy stepped aside, giving Jordan the room to fiddle about with the key. “You new around here?” he asked curiously. He knew most of the faces inside Austin Heights, especially on the sixth floor considering how much time he spent up there visiting the Ramseys.

“Uh yeah, I only moved in this morning. You live in 6A?” the guy replied, watching over his shoulder.

“No, my family do though. I’m down in 4C.” With a bit of struggle, the lock finally clicked the door swung open. Jordan stepped back with a big smile on his face. Watching JJ struggle with his locked door so many times had finally paid off.

“That’s awesome. You’re a lifesaver, dude!”

“Please, just call me Jordan. Lifesaver’s a bit too much,” he replied in a teasing voice. Much to his surprise, the guy blushed.

“Uh okay. It’s nice to meet you, Jordan!”

“And you…?”

The guy’s blush only deepened as he realized he hadn’t even introduced himself. “Oh! Brandon. My name’s Brandon.”

For a second the two men stood there smiling at each other before Jordan forced himself to snap back to reality. “You watch football, Brandon?”

Brandon’s face lit up like a star and a wide smile spread across his face. “Dude, I love football!”

“Wanna grab a beer and watch the game with me tomorrow?” Jordan asked, surprising himself with his own confidence.

“That sounds awesome. I’d love that!” Brandon exclaimed, giddy at the prospect. The enthusiasm was contagious and Jordan couldn’t help but let out a small giggle. Damn it, now he was blushing too.

“Well I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then, huh?”

“I guess you will. Thanks for this, man. The door and the invite. Brand new place, it’s pretty scary at first,” Brandon said almost sheepishly. Jordan thought it was the most adorable thing he’d ever heard.

“There’s no need to worry about that. Everybody in this building? Best people I’ve ever met, bar none.” That included Ryan with his indecisive feelings and Old Man Gus with his never-ending grumpiness. It included all of Aaron’s temper tantrums and Blaine’s obnoxious ranting. Truth be told, even with everybody’s flaws, Jordan knew he wouldn’t trade a single one of them for the world.

“That’s a high recommendation.”

“Trust me, you’ll love it here.” He said that with all confidence.

Brandon just smiled sweetly back at him. “I’m sure I will.”

 

* * *

 

 **Punkelman:** I’m sorry to say there’s no party this weekend guys :(

 **LightOfTheMoon:** WHAT?!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** EXPLAIN YOURSELF

 **TuggLife:** are u sure ur feeling ok barb?

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Yeah this isn’t like you. I’m concerned!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** I BOOKED EVERY FRIDAY OFF WORK FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR BECAUSE OF YOU

 **Punkelman:** Guys chill! It’s no big deal!

 **Punkelman:** I just happen to want a night off

 **Mad_King:** You’re going on a date, aren’t you?

 **Punkelman:** No

 **GavinoFree:** That’s a yes

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I’m not sure, it sure looks a lot like a no…

 **LightOfTheMoon:** who’s the lucky guy huh?!

 **Punkelman:** Oh my god if you don’t drop it there won’t be any parties ever!

 **TuggLife:** omg guys drop it NOW

 **LightOfTheMoon:** NO I DON’T WANT MY FRIDAYS OFF TO BE IN VAIN

 **Mad_King:** You know, I’m actually okay with no more parties…

 **TuggLife:** RYAN NO

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Don’t be Old Man Gus 2.0!

 **GavinoFree:** Ouch

 **Punkelman:** It’s true you wouldn’t want that!

 **Punkelman:** That would be disGUSting!

 **GavinoFree:** WEAK

 **LightOfTheMoon:** GODDAMN IT BARB

 **TuggLife:** of course you went there

 **TuggLife:** i don’t know why i’m so surprised

 **Mad_King:** Yeah, really not your best.

 **Punkelman:** Aw you guys suck!

 **Punkelman:** Anyway I gotta run! These buns won’t cook themselves!

 **Punkelman:** Bye guys!

_[PUNKELMAN is now offline]_

**GavinoFree:** Was that a sex joke?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** BYE BARB

 **LightOfTheMoon:** damn it

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I don’t know what it was but I’m choosing to believe she’s just cooking

 **AhoyWeirdness:** I shudder to think of the alternative

 **Mad_King:** Don’t we all?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** meh i can think of worse thoughts

 **TuggLife:** miles no

 **LightOfTheMoon:** i’m a straight, red blooded male! allow me to have my thoughts!

 **GavinoFree:** Wait you’re STRAIGHT?!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** YOU THOUGHT I WASN’T?!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** GAVIN YOU’VE KNOWN ME FOR A YEAR NOW

 **LightOfTheMoon:** WHAT THE FUCK

 **AhoyWeirdness:** And on that note, I gotta run! The football is calling me!

 **TuggLife:** lmfao get wrekt miles

 **GavinoFree:** Oops

 **Mad_King:** Bye Jordan!

 **AhoyWeirdness:** Gnight your highness! ;)

 **GavinoFree:** Bye!

_[AHOYWEIRDNESS is now offline]_

**LightOfTheMoon:** GAVIN I S2G YOU BETTER BE JOKING

 **GavinoFree:** I’m not!

 **GavinoFree:** I honestly thought you and Kerry were touching tips!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** TOUCHING TIPS?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** TOUCHING TIPS?!?!?!!??!?

 **LightOfTheMoon:** I CAN’T

 **LightOfTheMoon:** GOD DAMN IT GAVIN

 **TuggLife:** to be fair

 **TuggLife:** he’s not the only one

 **LightOfTheMoon:** YOU TOO?!?!?

 **Mad_King:** I didn’t!

 **LightOfTheMoon:** I’M LITERALLY RAGE QUITTING RIGHT NOW

 **LightOfTheMoon:** FUCK ALL OF YOU

_[LIGHTOFTHEMOON is now offline]_

**Mad_King:** Aw :(

 **TuggLife:** probably for the best there’s no party this week huh?

 **TuggLife:** anyway i gotta run

 **TuggLife:** i have a hot date tonight!

 **Mad_King:** Tell Michael to keep his hands to himself

 **Mad_King:** Or I’ll force him to!

 **TuggLife:** uh sorry but ur not actually our choice for a third

 **Mad_King:** A third?!

 **Mad_King:** What does that even mean?

 **TuggLife:** oh u clueless old man

 **TuggLife:** never change

_[TUGGLIFE is now offline]_

**GavinoFree:** Man it emptied out quick in here!

 **Mad_King:** I guess it did. Strange how often that happens.

 **Mad_King:** Maybe I really am turning into Gus…

 **GavinoFree:** That’s a scary thought!

 **Mad_King:** Tell me about it!

 **Mad_King:** So did you enjoy England?

 **GavinoFree:** Yeah it was alright! Glad to be back though

 **Mad_King:** Can’t beat Austin, huh?

 **GavinoFree:** Nah you really can’t

 **GavinoFree:** You know it occurs to me that we’ve never really been properly introduced

 **Mad_King:** Sure we have!

 **Mad_King:** At least like twice now?

 **GavinoFree:** Yeah but being drunk at a party doesn’t count

 **GavinoFree:** and then you were just Jordan’s boyfriend

 **GavinoFree:** Now you’re… you

 **Mad_King:** I’m me?

 **GavinoFree:** Yeah

 **Mad_King:** Ok then, sure.

 **GavinoFree:** We just don’t really know each other, do we?

 **Mad_King:** Are you suggesting we start over?

 **GavinoFree:** I guess I am, yeah

 **Mad_King:** We can do that…

 **Mad_King:** Hi, I’m Ryan, I live in 5D.

 **GavinoFree:** Hi Ryan, my name’s Gavin and I’m 4B.

 **Mad_King:** Well it’s nice to finally meet you, 4B!

 **GavinoFree:** And the same to you :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for the Epilogue, coming soon...


	20. Epilogue: Two Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot of things changed in two years.

“We’re gonna be late if you don’t hurry the heck up!” Gavin yelled from the kitchen. Ryan’s attempt to hurry up led him to mess up the knot in his tie and he huffed, undoing it all to try again.

“We’re not going to be late. It’s _downstairs_ ,” Ryan reminded him, rolling his eyes. It took him a few more times to get his tie done up perfectly but he got there in the end and smiled at his reflection in achievement. Personally he thought he looked a little out of place this dressed up but formalwear was the call of the day and Gavin wasn't going to let him get away with any less than his Sunday best. For his own part Gavin had bought a brand new suit with a brilliant blue bowtie and he beamed at him as Ryan left their bedroom.

"So, how'd I look?" Gavin asked, smiling hopefully. Ryan just grinned back.

"Beautiful."

"Aw, shut up you soppy git," Gavin replied, ignoring the deep scarlet blush that crossed over his cheeks. "You don't scrub up half bad either." Ryan raised an eyebrow and let out a short laugh. Gavin definitely had his own way of delivering compliments but he'd long gotten used to that over the past two years.

Things had progressed very slowly between them but that had been a conscious choice. For the first few months most of their meetings were accompanied by others - Lindsay mainly but sometimes Michael would be there, other times Jeremy or Caleb. Neither of them seemed too keen on Ryan at first, clearly still distrusting of him after how things had ended with Jordan but over time they seemed to ease up and accept him. Ryan wished he could say the same for Geoff who was still just as salty as ever. Luckily he wasn't outwardly violent either, if only because Lindsay made sure to make her presence known whenever he was around. Their GTA rivalry had become something of legend around the building.

Jordan had been dating Brandon three months by the time Ryan and Gavin went on their first official date. Ryan didn't actually get to talk to Jordan about it until a few dates later but Gavin had assured him that his surrogate brother had no issue with it. Sure enough Jordan just sent him smiley-emoticons when he had brought the topic up in a private chat between them and wished them luck. He then proceeded to berate both him and Gavin with double date requests and they were suckered into it every time if only because they'd feel guilty turning Jordan down. He was a master at the puppy dog eyes and Brandon wasn't half bad at them either. The pair of them were rather sickeningly adorable in literally everybody's opinion and Ryan found himself grinning every time Brandon demonstrated just how dedicated to Jordan and deeply in love he was. At least Jordan had finally found somebody who could appreciate him for who he was rather than who he knew and while they had never exactly been the same since the breakup, Ryan was glad they could still at least be friends after everything.

Leaving the apartment behind, Ryan and Gavin joined fellow fifth floor occupant Josh Ornelas in the lift. He was flying solo as always, still playing Chris' wingman while still getting enough game for himself to make anybody jealous. He had become Ryan's co-op partner whenever Gavin, Lindsay or Michael wasn't available but honestly Ryan was glad it wasn't more frequent because Josh put him to shame with his video game skills. It was definitely something strange to be ashamed of, that was for sure.

"You ready for the big day?" Josh asked, grinning at them.

"It's not  _our_ wedding," Gavin pointed out. Ryan just chortled.

"Give it time," Josh muttered, grinning a Ryan. Gavin sputtered out a few noises and fell silent.

As the doors rolled open on the ground floor, they were greeted by a lobby full of guests. The ladies were dressed in a variety of dresses - some long, others short, some glittery and others patterned. The men were all in suits of varying styles, many of them looking just as uncomfortable as Ryan felt in the formalwear. He felt united in their joint discomfort.

Blaine gave the boys a mock salute as they passed and Josh hurried off to join him and Chris in conversation with Aaron and his on-again-off-again boyfriend Tyler Coe. Both Ryan and Gavin had agreed that Tyler had the most amazing voice they had ever heard but he seemed far too laidback for Aaron. Then again who were they to judge? They were hardly matching characters either and they had learned just how well opposites worked together. Tyler seemed to make Aaron very happy (for a few weeks at a time) so the residents of Austin Heights made a conscious effort to be happy for him when they were together and sad when they had suffered yet another inevitable break-up. 

"Well don't you boys look lovely today?" Barbara hollered at them as she approached, making no secret of checking them both out. "Now are you both sure you don't feel that urge to experiment with a girl because I would be game if you guys are." It was her usual teasing and Gavin was used to it by now, simply rolling his eyes and telling Barb to 'sod off' but Ryan felt himself blush.

"You're not really my type," he mumbled, feeling a rush of relief pass through him as Gavin's fingers interlocked with his own. "Besides, this one sorta takes up most of my time." Gavin just beamed back at him. The smile was more than a little infectious. Barb let out a teasing noise of disgust before grinning and moving past them in her usual hunt for some beer.

They had barely made it out into the gardens where the wedding was taking place when Ryan was attacked. All he saw was a flash of red hair before he was pulled into a tight embrace. "We got the house,  _we got the house!"_ Lindsay all but shrieked into his ear. Ryan immediately spun her around, his grin spreading even wider.

"Holy shit, that's awesome!" he exclaimed, finally setting her down. Michael just laughed and pulled Gavin into a quick hug. It was far less excitable than how Lindsay had embraced Ryan but they'd always been a bit over the top. "When do you guys move out?"

"Two weeks on Friday. We've spent all day planning the move, it's gonna be a killer," Lindsay sighed as she stepped back, giving Ryan the chance to finally see her in full. She was wearing a bright blue dress perfectly matched by the blue of Michael's tie. Ryan almost wanted to rib them for their matching couples outfits. They'd certainly done it to him and Gavin when they hadn't even been intending to wear similar clothes and colors. 

Life without Lindsay in Austin Heights seemed like a challenge Ryan was dreading undertaking but he felt some relief in knowing that he wasn't going to be doing it alone. Gavin had moved in almost a year ago and he had grown quite accustomed to having the Brit in his living space. Sure that meant they had to host Dan every few months when he came to visit and Ryan had to deal with twice as much discussion about fake sports and horrible candy but it made Gavin happy and anything that made his boyfriend happy was enough for Ryan.

Michael had moved in with Lindsay only a few months after returning from his short stay back in Jersey. By that point Chris had already put his offer in on Michael's old apartment so he'd been forced to share with Kerry until Lindsay was ready to take the step and let him move in. Ryan had watched their relationship grow in admiration, respecting Michael for not forcing anything and letting Lindsay have the final word in when she was ready to forgive him for abandoning her. Over time all of the old wounds healed and Ryan found himself willing to forgive Michael for hurting his best friend. Now that was a long forgotten event and while Lindsay didn't spend so much time crashing out on his couch anymore, they were still best friends and Ryan knew he was welcome at hers any time he needed it.

"You guys need help with the move?" he offered.

"Yes!" Michael exclaimed quickly. "I'm gonna break my back if I have to do this shit on my own."

"Aw Michael, I believe in you!" Gavin cooed, earning himself a smack on the shoulder from Michael because of it. Ryan just tutted.

"We'd be happy to help, wouldn't we?" Ryan offered, giving Gavin a look. The Brit frowned in confusion before shrugging.

"Guess I don't have much choice, do I?" he huffed.

"Nope!" three voices echoed back at him.

They continued to mingle as the wedding party prepared for the big event. Ryan found himself greeting his boss near the empty refreshment table and caught Burnie looking rather sheepishly hiding a half-finished bottle of beer behind his back. Ashley was scolding him in a harsh whisper but the moment she saw Ryan approach she softened up and pulled him into a hug. It had been a long time since he'd seen her. She had moved out of Austin Heights almost two years ago and while she still made frequent visits back and even sometimes came into the office and sat with him while Burnie finished up work, it wasn't nearly as regular as it had been when she'd lived just a few floors below. That was the way life worked though, some people were bound to drift apart.

The three of them (Gavin having disappeared to chat to Kdin and his new partner) had been in the middle of a conversation about the newly announced next-gen consoles when Ashley's eyes snapped suddenly towards the door. "Meg!" she squealed, bouncing away from them to run and capture her best friend in a tight hug. The dark-haired girl next to Meg quickly pulled away laughing as she watched the two best friends flail around on the spot for a two seconds. Meg had introduced Ryan and Gavin to her new girlfriend just a few months earlier and now Mariel had become a somewhat permanent fixture in all of their lives considering she was a bartender at the bar across the road from Austin Heights. Ryan sympathized with her for the amount of neighborly drama she probably overhead on a nightly basis.

"Missed you!" Meg mumbled into her best friend's ear. While Ryan had never exactly been close with Meg, he still heard a lot about her from Burnie talking about Ashley. It was like a strange game of whispers hearing about their old drama on a third hand basis but Ryan was just glad that they had resolved their differences. It had been somewhat frosty after Ashley had left Austin Heights to move in with Burnie but now not only had her friendship with Meg recovered but she was also sporting a shiny diamond engagement ring. Ashley had stopped by the bar to let everybody know and of course that night had ended up with Ryan waking up on Miles' couch, seemingly too drunk to make it any higher than the second floor.

"Mariel, hey! It's great to see you again!" Ashley greeted the other girl after she finally managed to pull away from Meg, wrapping an arm around Mariel's shoulder and leaning in to place a kiss on her cheek. "You guys look so good!" Mariel was wearing a long black dress with a few select areas cut out to show off some skin while Meg's dress was a sparkling gold that served as a reminder for Ryan to grab some champagne while it was freely available.

Meg hurried off rather quickly, exclaiming in a loud voice "Maid of Honor duties!" after leaving Mariel in Ashley's care. Burnie seemed more than a little overwhelmed by the time Ryan left him in the middle off a discussion about winged eyeliner between the two remaining women.

The guests were all told to take their seats by the time Ryan finally made it back to Gavin. They were all slowly shuffled towards the seats at the back of the garden facing a small archway at the very end. Meg and Blaine were already waiting there, Blaine whispering encouraging thoughts to Kyle who was stood at the end of the aisle waiting. Ryan and Gavin found themselves sat near the back right next to Jeremy and his new boyfriend Trevor. They exchanged hushed greetings before falling into silence as the music started.

To tell the truth, Ryan wasn't the biggest fan of weddings. Big social functions like that made him feel awkward, something he'd learned quickly thanks to Barbara's weekly parties. This was different though. Sure, he wasn't close to either of the grooms but the residents were Austin Heights were a family whether they wanted to be or not. Ryan was willing to put his own awkardness aside in order to make sure that his friends had the best day possible. Besides, Gavin held his hand through the whole thing and Ryan would be lying if he said it didn't make him grin like an idiot because it totally did.

As Patrick walked down the aisle, accompanied by Griffon who had eagerly accepted the role of being everybody's surrogate mother, Ryan felt Gavin's head rest on his shoulder. Turning ever so slightly, he placed a kiss on the Brit's forehead and relaxed against him. Two years ago and he never would have thought any of this was possible. Now though? Well it was a whole new world.

True to form, Meg was already in tears by the time Patrick reached the end of the aisle. Griffon gave Patrick away before joining Geoff and Caleb in the second row, fitting comfortably against the younger male's side. Even Blaine got a little teared up during Kyle's vows as he promised to not only be there for Patrick but also kick anybody's ass who dared look at him wrong. Of course it was the display of ridiculous masculinity that got to Blaine. Ryan couldn't help but chuckle softly.

After the rings were exchanged and the grooms finally kissed to seal their marriage, the place erupted into applause. Everybody was on their feet cheering for them as Patrick grabbed his new husband by the neck and despite their height and strength differences, still managed to dip him just enough to plant a kiss on his lips in true cinematic fashion.

The rest of the night passed by in a blur. Ryan would only remember certain parts of it later as Gavin and Lindsay both seemed obsessed with making sure he never had an empty glass in his hands. He remembered Old Man Gus' DJ set at the party which went down surprisingly well considering the amount of Barenaked Ladies he played. He remembered Kyle and Patrick's touching first dance that was very quickly undermined by a quick cut to Gangnam Style that caused more than a few groans as the new husbands felt no shame about dancing along. He remembered Mariel twirling Meg to some slow ballad while Ashley stood comfortably in Burnie's embrace. He  _definitely_ remembered finding Miles and Barbara making out behind the bar although sometimes he wished he didn't.

And of course he remembered his best friends and his family. Lindsay and Michael had danced long into the night, the life of the party without any shame. Both Gavin and Ryan had been a lot more hesitant to dance but Jordan and Brandon had grabbed them and they couldn't argue as the men pulled them onto the dance floor.

"Thank you," Jordan muttered so quietly that Ryan almost missed it over the sound of the music. He frowned.

"For what?"

"You helped me a lot more than you know you did. You're a good guy, Haywood." Ryan felt himself blush. Then, as if sensing his emotional vulnerability, Gavin swept in like a British Prince Charming and caught him by the hand.

"Come on then, love, let's see your moves!"

Ryan smiled fondly back at him. "I warn you, you'll be disappointed."

"Nah. You could never disappointment me." After two long years and a considerable amount of growing up from the both of them, Ryan finally believed that. He kissed Gavin.

"I love you, 4B."

"Yeah, yeah, you're not gonna get out of dancing that easily, 5D."

They danced the rest of the night away, finally happy in each other's embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S OVER! I'm crying tbh, this is my first multi-chapter fic to ever be completed!
> 
> Huge thanks to Andy/spirithallow for doing SPAG checks on the last eight or so chapters, you're a star.
> 
> Big love to everybody who's been reading since chapter one, thank you for sticking with it and thank you to the people who discovered it along the way! I never thought it would get this many hits/kudos so I'm really overwhelmed!
> 
> THANK YOU SO MUCH <3


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